Chapter 2:
Dead Child
Footsteps of Aru
I saw soldiers coming toward our trench.
I started firing.
Baat-baat-baat!
“Focus, everyone! Make them slow down! Fire at the ground in front of them!”
I fired several rounds. The enemy soldiers hesitated.
“Move! Everyone, mark your positions!”
I saw them launch rocket-propelled grenades and mortars.
I ran toward the enemy through the heavy rain, firing as I moved. I dropped to the ground to make myself a smaller target.
A mortar struck one of our soldiers.
“Help me!” he screamed.
“Nick! Go to Kevin and give him the morphine!”
“Roger. Best of luck.”
Luck, huh?
I laughed bitterly and advanced.
All around me, I could hear nothing but gunfire.
“Everyone, get down! Mortar incoming!”
I looked toward Nick. He was beside Kevin.
Kevin looked at me. I could see it in his eyes.
He knew he wouldn't survive.
I wanted to say, Please save him.
But Commander Lupin shouted, “If the chance of survival is low, kill him. He is wasting our time.”
I wanted to slap him.
He is our man.
but i could not.
He was our senior commander.
And, deep down, I knew he was right.
Nick opened his knife.
“Jim, I'm sorry.”
Kevin looked at him.
“Tell my wife I love her... and tell my son to always protect his little sister.”
He tried to say something else.
He never got the chance.
Nick stabbed him and closed his eyes.
Then he stood up and continued advancing as if nothing had happened.
But I saw his eyes.
Something inside him had changed.
He had become a part of death.
He had lost himself today.
I wanted to tell him that I understood.
But somewhere inside, I knew I couldn't.
Then I heard the voice again.
“Advance, comrades! Kill the bastards!”
I ran forward with my machine gun.
“Go! Go! Go! Fast!”
My team rushed toward the enemy position.
“Secure the position! I'll provide backup!”
I stood up and started firing.
Brrat! Brrat! Brrat!
Ten, fifteen rounds.
Reload.
Fire.
Reload.
Fire.
Then something hard struck my head.
I fell backward.
Blood ran down my face.
I looked up.
The sky was filled with dark clouds, rain, planes, and thick smoke.
Is this my last moment?
I couldn't hear anything except a loud ringing in my ears.
“Are you alive?”
“Maybe.”
“How many fingers do you see?”
“Four.”
He quickly changed his hand.
“No. It's five.”
He gave me a small smile.
I smiled back.
“Can you move?”
I knew I couldn't.
“Yes,” I said.
I picked up my gear and injected myself with a small dose of morphine. Then I slapped my face hard.Wake up.Come back.“Not today,” I whispered. “I must survive. I have to find a way home.”I picked up my gun and started firing again.I ran.Sometimes I jumped.Sometimes I dropped to the ground.Sometimes I crawled toward cover.Then I heard the strange voice again.“Lower... lower...”Without hesitation, I dropped flat onto the ground.A rocket flew over my head.I looked around.“Who are you? Why are you helping me?”There was no answer.Commander Lupin shouted, “Not many enemy soldiers are left! We can win!”I forced myself to concentrate.I ran toward cover with the others.We spotted an enemy bunker.“Find them! They're the last hundred!”I helped one of the soldiers load a rocket launcher.“Shoot it! Now! Fast! They may spot us!”He aimed.“Shoot!”The rocket screamed through the air.Soooooosh!It hit the bunker directly.“Get back!” Commander Lupin shouted. “It's firing toward us! Pull back! Pull back! Hold the ground!”“We're out of ammunition!” I shouted. “We need backup!”“There is no backup!”I looked at the battlefield.There was barely an hour of daylight left.“We have to finish this and secure the post,” Lupin said. “Use the time we have. Attach the knife to your gun and attack the enemy.”I opened my knife and attached it to the gun.Then I ran toward the bunker.They were out of ammunition too.Inside the bunker, I saw a soldier trying to choke Nick.I kicked him in the ribs.He flew backward and fell several metres away.I looked at his face.He was a young boy.Maybe fifteen.I grabbed my gun.“Kill him, Aru!” Nick shouted. “He has a bomb!”I froze.The boy looked terrified.I pushed my knife into his throat.He fell.Blood poured from the wound.He tried to stop it with his hands.“Sorry,” I whispered. “I'm sorry. I don't know what to do. I'm sorry.”What have I done?He was just a boy.Maybe the same age as my little brother.With these hands...I killed him.I looked into his eyes.His hands were still pressed against his throat. Blood filled his mouth.There was something innocent in his eyes.I started crying.“What have I done?”My voice broke.“I killed a boy.”Everything went black.I found myself standing in a black void.The boy was there.He looked at me.“You killed me.”I couldn't speak.“My mother and father are waiting for me. Who will take care of them in their old age?”I lowered my head.“You killed their support.”His voice became louder.“I haven't even seen the world yet.”I whispered, “I'm sorry.”Again.And again.“I'm sorry.”But my apology meant nothing.Someone grabbed my legs.I looked down.The dead soldiers were there, their bodies reduced to skeletal forms.“Leave me!”I tried to pull away.“I didn't want to kill you! It was a mistake!”I fell into despair.Then the strange voice spoke.“You know what? Today, you killed yourself.”I looked around.“Welcome to hell.”Her voice sounded almost amused.“We're going to enjoy our time together.”“No!”I screamed.“Stop! I want to go home! Please! Somebody help me!”Then I saw Aru sitting beside the boy's lifeless body.His face was completely blank.He slowly turned toward me.“You murderer.”I tried to run.“Please, stop!”The world began falling apart.The boy climbed onto my chest.“I will never leave you.”His eyes were filled with hatred.“I am waiting for you to die.”Then he laughed.“Ha... ha... ha... ha... ha...”I closed my eyes.What is happening to me?Which side am I on?Am I doing the right thing?Are we really heroes?I don't know anymore.“Coffee. Want coffee?”I opened my eyes.I was back.I looked at the soldier sitting beside me.“No, thanks.”He looked at me.“Aru, this is war. Every second, somebody dies. That's how it is.”He paused.“You're not a god. We're merely puppets for the king. We promised to protect this land. It's our job.”“Don't be sad.”I looked at him.“At what cost?”Everyone around us became silent.I picked up my gun.I made a choice.I will always remember how many people I killed with my own hands.The sergeant pointed toward the dead boy.“Throw the body.”Umang picked him up and threw him into the pit.I wanted to give him a proper goodbye.A proper sign-off.But I couldn't.Umang looked into the pit.“Check his body. Maybe you'll find some supplies or gold.”I searched the boy's pockets.I found a pencil.Two or three packets of prophylactics.A small diary.And a letter.I sat beneath a tree and turned on my torch.I opened the letter.Dear Mom,I know you are upset and angry, but please don't be. I'm happy to fight for my country.Say hi to Father.Tell my brother he can keep my bicycle.Tell him I love him.Now I have become a hero.I met someone.Bye, Mom.Your favourite son,Lewis Parker.I stopped reading.There was something else written at the bottom.A song.I really like you, Mom.I really love you, Mom.Warm and gentle, Mom.Can you kiss me, Mom?You can call me, Mom,And I'll be happy.My only one, Mom.I want to hold your hand,Go to the park with you.That makes me happy, Mom.I really like you, Mom.I love you, Mom.I want to meet youAnd eat your food, Mom.I couldn't breathe.The silent night seemed to suffocate me.I wanted to die.Please... somebody let me die.But I folded the letter carefully and put it inside my pocket.“Lewis,” I whispered, “I promise. After the war, I'll give this letter to your mother.”I opened his diary.The first line read:War does not only kill people—it slowly erases the person who survives it.I stared at the sentence for a long time.Then I took the pencil.I crossed out the line.I opened to the next page.And I wrote my first journal entry.1 November 1001.The beginning.That night, I couldn't sleep.That was the moment I realised everything had changed.The world was different now.Everything had become black and white.The colour was gone.I missed you, Maria.My love...
I started firing.
Baat-baat-baat!
“Focus, everyone! Make them slow down! Fire at the ground in front of them!”
I fired several rounds. The enemy soldiers hesitated.
“Move! Everyone, mark your positions!”
I saw them launch rocket-propelled grenades and mortars.
I ran toward the enemy through the heavy rain, firing as I moved. I dropped to the ground to make myself a smaller target.
A mortar struck one of our soldiers.
“Help me!” he screamed.
“Nick! Go to Kevin and give him the morphine!”
“Roger. Best of luck.”
Luck, huh?
I laughed bitterly and advanced.
All around me, I could hear nothing but gunfire.
“Everyone, get down! Mortar incoming!”
I looked toward Nick. He was beside Kevin.
Kevin looked at me. I could see it in his eyes.
He knew he wouldn't survive.
I wanted to say, Please save him.
But Commander Lupin shouted, “If the chance of survival is low, kill him. He is wasting our time.”
I wanted to slap him.
He is our man.
but i could not.
He was our senior commander.
And, deep down, I knew he was right.
Nick opened his knife.
“Jim, I'm sorry.”
Kevin looked at him.
“Tell my wife I love her... and tell my son to always protect his little sister.”
He tried to say something else.
He never got the chance.
Nick stabbed him and closed his eyes.
Then he stood up and continued advancing as if nothing had happened.
But I saw his eyes.
Something inside him had changed.
He had become a part of death.
He had lost himself today.
I wanted to tell him that I understood.
But somewhere inside, I knew I couldn't.
Then I heard the voice again.
“Advance, comrades! Kill the bastards!”
I ran forward with my machine gun.
“Go! Go! Go! Fast!”
My team rushed toward the enemy position.
“Secure the position! I'll provide backup!”
I stood up and started firing.
Brrat! Brrat! Brrat!
Ten, fifteen rounds.
Reload.
Fire.
Reload.
Fire.
Then something hard struck my head.
I fell backward.
Blood ran down my face.
I looked up.
The sky was filled with dark clouds, rain, planes, and thick smoke.
Is this my last moment?
I couldn't hear anything except a loud ringing in my ears.
I couldn't think.
A soldier ran toward me, grabbed my legs, and pulled me behind a small mound.“Are you alive?”
“Maybe.”
“How many fingers do you see?”
“Four.”
He quickly changed his hand.
“No. It's five.”
He gave me a small smile.
I smiled back.
“Can you move?”
I knew I couldn't.
“Yes,” I said.
I picked up my gear and injected myself with a small dose of morphine. Then I slapped my face hard.Wake up.Come back.“Not today,” I whispered. “I must survive. I have to find a way home.”I picked up my gun and started firing again.I ran.Sometimes I jumped.Sometimes I dropped to the ground.Sometimes I crawled toward cover.Then I heard the strange voice again.“Lower... lower...”Without hesitation, I dropped flat onto the ground.A rocket flew over my head.I looked around.“Who are you? Why are you helping me?”There was no answer.Commander Lupin shouted, “Not many enemy soldiers are left! We can win!”I forced myself to concentrate.I ran toward cover with the others.We spotted an enemy bunker.“Find them! They're the last hundred!”I helped one of the soldiers load a rocket launcher.“Shoot it! Now! Fast! They may spot us!”He aimed.“Shoot!”The rocket screamed through the air.Soooooosh!It hit the bunker directly.“Get back!” Commander Lupin shouted. “It's firing toward us! Pull back! Pull back! Hold the ground!”“We're out of ammunition!” I shouted. “We need backup!”“There is no backup!”I looked at the battlefield.There was barely an hour of daylight left.“We have to finish this and secure the post,” Lupin said. “Use the time we have. Attach the knife to your gun and attack the enemy.”I opened my knife and attached it to the gun.Then I ran toward the bunker.They were out of ammunition too.Inside the bunker, I saw a soldier trying to choke Nick.I kicked him in the ribs.He flew backward and fell several metres away.I looked at his face.He was a young boy.Maybe fifteen.I grabbed my gun.“Kill him, Aru!” Nick shouted. “He has a bomb!”I froze.The boy looked terrified.I pushed my knife into his throat.He fell.Blood poured from the wound.He tried to stop it with his hands.“Sorry,” I whispered. “I'm sorry. I don't know what to do. I'm sorry.”What have I done?He was just a boy.Maybe the same age as my little brother.With these hands...I killed him.I looked into his eyes.His hands were still pressed against his throat. Blood filled his mouth.There was something innocent in his eyes.I started crying.“What have I done?”My voice broke.“I killed a boy.”Everything went black.I found myself standing in a black void.The boy was there.He looked at me.“You killed me.”I couldn't speak.“My mother and father are waiting for me. Who will take care of them in their old age?”I lowered my head.“You killed their support.”His voice became louder.“I haven't even seen the world yet.”I whispered, “I'm sorry.”Again.And again.“I'm sorry.”But my apology meant nothing.Someone grabbed my legs.I looked down.The dead soldiers were there, their bodies reduced to skeletal forms.“Leave me!”I tried to pull away.“I didn't want to kill you! It was a mistake!”I fell into despair.Then the strange voice spoke.“You know what? Today, you killed yourself.”I looked around.“Welcome to hell.”Her voice sounded almost amused.“We're going to enjoy our time together.”“No!”I screamed.“Stop! I want to go home! Please! Somebody help me!”Then I saw Aru sitting beside the boy's lifeless body.His face was completely blank.He slowly turned toward me.“You murderer.”I tried to run.“Please, stop!”The world began falling apart.The boy climbed onto my chest.“I will never leave you.”His eyes were filled with hatred.“I am waiting for you to die.”Then he laughed.“Ha... ha... ha... ha... ha...”I closed my eyes.What is happening to me?Which side am I on?Am I doing the right thing?Are we really heroes?I don't know anymore.“Coffee. Want coffee?”I opened my eyes.I was back.I looked at the soldier sitting beside me.“No, thanks.”He looked at me.“Aru, this is war. Every second, somebody dies. That's how it is.”He paused.“You're not a god. We're merely puppets for the king. We promised to protect this land. It's our job.”“Don't be sad.”I looked at him.“At what cost?”Everyone around us became silent.I picked up my gun.I made a choice.I will always remember how many people I killed with my own hands.The sergeant pointed toward the dead boy.“Throw the body.”Umang picked him up and threw him into the pit.I wanted to give him a proper goodbye.A proper sign-off.But I couldn't.Umang looked into the pit.“Check his body. Maybe you'll find some supplies or gold.”I searched the boy's pockets.I found a pencil.Two or three packets of prophylactics.A small diary.And a letter.I sat beneath a tree and turned on my torch.I opened the letter.Dear Mom,I know you are upset and angry, but please don't be. I'm happy to fight for my country.Say hi to Father.Tell my brother he can keep my bicycle.Tell him I love him.Now I have become a hero.I met someone.Bye, Mom.Your favourite son,Lewis Parker.I stopped reading.There was something else written at the bottom.A song.I really like you, Mom.I really love you, Mom.Warm and gentle, Mom.Can you kiss me, Mom?You can call me, Mom,And I'll be happy.My only one, Mom.I want to hold your hand,Go to the park with you.That makes me happy, Mom.I really like you, Mom.I love you, Mom.I want to meet youAnd eat your food, Mom.I couldn't breathe.The silent night seemed to suffocate me.I wanted to die.Please... somebody let me die.But I folded the letter carefully and put it inside my pocket.“Lewis,” I whispered, “I promise. After the war, I'll give this letter to your mother.”I opened his diary.The first line read:War does not only kill people—it slowly erases the person who survives it.I stared at the sentence for a long time.Then I took the pencil.I crossed out the line.I opened to the next page.And I wrote my first journal entry.1 November 1001.The beginning.That night, I couldn't sleep.That was the moment I realised everything had changed.The world was different now.Everything had become black and white.The colour was gone.I missed you, Maria.My love...
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