A Saint's Duty

Faint whispers danced along the edge. They were barely even voices. Just noise that poked in. It took so long for them to even be recognized as words. And even still they weren’t words that would be understood. It was just a voice echoed into the void. A consuming void that pressed in upon Sophia.

Suddenly, her awareness started to return. ‘Where’s the forest? Am I dead? No, no, no I don’t think that’s the case. But I feel odd. I don’t feel anything. Or am I asleep?’ She tried to move, but nothing reacted for her. Her body didn’t even seem to be connected to her. ‘What’s wrong with me? This isn’t happening because of all those bad things I said about the goddess is it? She’s not punishing me for not believing she’s real?’

Doubt and confusion spurred her to wake more from her thoughts. The distant sounds that became voices started to become clear. And yet it was a mix. There wasn’t just one singular voice. ‘This isn’t how being dead supposed to be, right? It’s supposed to be quiet.’ Voices were talking over other voices. She could hear urgent tones giving out orders.

“I’m glad I’m not dead. Though it’s too loud to sleep.”

“I’ll be sure to tell the doctors to speak softly to their patients.”

“Oh it’s the Prince. He would be able to tell everyone to be quiet.”

“But I’m not.”

“Because he’s mean.”

“Naturally.”

“Are you going to finish waking up or are we going to keep having a conversation like you’re half asleep?”

Sophia’s eyes opened sharply with reality finally hitting her. She looked over to see that it was indeed Prince Henri. And she was in some sort of makeshift clinic. Quickly she tried to hide under the blanket. “There’s no blanket.”

“No, supplies are a little short. For as stupid as you were to take a blow for me, they say your barrier protected you from the worst.”

When he said that, she tried to move as the rest of the pieces fell into place. Sharp pain rose through her back like she had never known. It wasn’t like when her back hurt or even a cough. She had never been injured severely. The whole feeling, the intensity was shocking and crippling. “The pain…it’s going everywhere.”

“You’re still injured. But others were far worse.”

Finally, all the voices became clear to her. There were groans of pain, shouting for the goddess, orders to brace someone, it was all chaos. “I remember the fighting. I thought it wasn’t bad. There weren't any injured.”

The Prince shook his head. “From your position you couldn’t see everything. You only saw the ones still standing.”

“Then I failed.”

“The heart of the den is purified and the expedition succeeded. It was never going to be without death or injury. We won because of your aid.”

Sophia laid still. For once her mind was blank. Only images flashed to her. The fighting, the blood, the monsters. Scenes that she didn’t remember played for her. Maybe she remembered them now after blocking them out. Or panic clouded her mind. Or his words just filled in blanks that she didn’t know existed. The cries of the soldiers filled her.

“I need to do something. It’s my fault.” She tried to move again, but the searing pain burned through her back again.

“You will stay where you are and heal.”

“This is a problem.”

“Yes. Listen to me.”

“No.”

“Sophia.” His voice came in firm and yet not cold. However, her mind cleared into a focus. Immediately, she closed her eyes and looked inward.

The Veil flared around her in response to her call. Mana flowed into the formula. She had done it before, even if the circumstances were different. Light surrounded her. “So this is what it feels like. It’s sort of like swimming in bathwater. It’s not so bad.” Quickly, all of the burning ceased. There was a little itching and awkwardness, then a tightness like someone pulled on her whole body. “And now it’s weird.”

It all happened so quickly that any attempt by the Prince to stop her or act was too slow. His hand rested on the cot she laid in, even as he leaned in a little. “Did you heal yourself?”

“I wasn’t told I couldn’t, though I never tried before.” Sophia sat up properly in the cot and twisted a little to look around the whole room. “Everything doesn’t hurt anymore. I can walk!” And then she jumped out testing her own confirmation. A little stretch of her arms and everything felt right. “This whole magic thing feels like cheating. But it’s not so bad.”

Sophia recalled the same feeling of the clinic. ‘I did it by accident that time. But I can do it. I just have to focus.’ Even though she had managed it before, the case of creating a magical formula that reached everyone and mended injuries, lost limbs, any condition was far broader than her attempt before. ‘I was able to cure any disease and injury even though that wasn’t my target. I really don’t understand this magic as well as Mister Jolsi believes. How can it do such impossible things for me?’

An image of the reason came to mind for Sophia, but she pushed it away. She refused to let that be the answer. ‘I just need to help everyone. If I had more practice, understood magic better, but I have to make do.’ She didn’t know how much mana it would need. This was far more than the clinic with the sick. She didn’t even see all the soldiers. It was all just voices in the air. And they all needed help.

The Veil around Sophia exploded off her as the magic array spread out over the whole room and beyond. Prince Henri tried and failed to have his voice reach her with the blinding white light that filled the space. All the voices of pain and agony calmed to confusion and then silence.

When the light finally faded, Sophia had a hand on the cot nearly kneeling. Her body was hot, almost like a fever. “That was far more exhausting than I expected.” It felt like she had been hollowed out. The clinic was draining, but this stretched her far more. Her body felt empty in a way that it hadn’t before. “Is this what it’s like to be completely empty of mana?”

“Sophia? Are you okay?”

She looked over to see the Prince kneeling down to see her. It was a strange feeling. ‘The coldness is gone.’ Swallowing roughly, everything felt off balance. She probably would have fallen over without the bracing of the cot. “How is everyone? The soldiers? Did I help?”

“You did enough.”

Her hand reached for his arm. She pulled on him. “Did I?”

“Yes. The men look improved. I’ll check everyone later, but you need rest.” He helped her back to her feet.

Tolen and Noan rushed over to her side. She could see the relief on their faces even as they tried to argue with the Prince over supporting duties. ‘I hope it is enough.’ A bit of a smile came over her watching the Prince actually getting a little heated with her guards. ‘Why is he so determined?’ In the end, he was their superior and won out.