A Little Town in the Sticks

When I come to, I'm blinded by a bright light almost directly in front of my face. After a brief adjustment, it becomes clear that the light is actually pretty small. The world would be completely black if not for this small flame.

"Ah, you've finally woken up."

I'm laying beside the fire with a blanket over me. One seat away is the armoured form of Bernard, currently chewing away at a piece of hard bread.

"Where am I?"

"We are camping on the village outskirts. Tomorrow, we will join the knights in escorting the survivors to Theinard."

"Survivors!? Those folks were able to escape!?"

He softly waves his hand. Having risked my life to save their people, hearing about the fate of the village is enough to make my wounds reopen.

"Around half of the villagers survived."

The answer wasn't from Bernard, but from a young hero sitting across the small flame. He doesn't look me in the eye, choosing instead to watch the dancing embers. Beside him is an equally silent Katherine.

"Guys…"

There are a lot of words that I want to say to the foolish children, but a few come to mind first.

"Thanks for coming back."

Maybe they had expected me to yell at them first, but the shock on all three of their faces makes me glad that I started here.

"So many more would have died had you not stepped in. Me as well."

"But…"

Leon is being reserved, guilt obvious on his face. I don't need to tell him how many lives would have been saved had he joined me from the beginning. However, there's no point in dragging that point into this tranquil night.

"It's fine. You saved us in the end, so hold up your heads!"

To prove my point, I push these aching bones into a sitting position. I even pump my fists to show how healthy I am. Everything hurts like crazy, but nobody can deny that I'm alive.

"What of the Demon Lord? Did you fight her—I mean it?"

"We were unable to."

Leon tosses a stone into the bonfire, causing bursts of embers to break away into the sky. His lips are pursed in frustration, fists clenched against his lap.

"We attempted to chase, but it continued to lead us farther and farther from the village. In the end, we decided that it would be best to return and defend the village."

"So that's what happened…"

Recalling how Ailith had talked about these children of hers, that must have been her aim. Interacting with the heroes led to them being injured or killed. While she could have undergone a fight to the death, she decided to quietly lead the threats away. Once her distraction was over, she returned to monitor them again.

"If only we had pulled back sooner…"

Katherine pulls down her hat and hides her face in shame. No matter how much I console them, it appears that the scars of their mistake will not disappear so quickly. That's fine, as kids need at least a few to grow up properly.

"Rado."

"Hm?"

Leon finally looks directly at me, lights dancing within his dark eyes. Unlike usual, these flames are not his own.

"Why did you not allow me to kill that demon?"

This unexpected question leaves me at a loss. For somebody so engrossed in his rage, seeing him stopping to think about killing leaves a strange taste in my mouth. I can't say that it's a particularly poor taste.

"Ah, that…"

"I heard that you lost your village to demons. Do you not desire revenge?"

Looking down at my hands, I notice a set of wrappings not weathered by battle. The fabric is a clean white surface without a single scratch or tear. They must have seen the scars that even I'm too scared to witness.

"Let me tell you all a story."

I watch as the embers pull themselves away from the fire and climb upwards to the glowing moon. The higher they go, the closer they resemble fireflies that filled the forest of my home.

"I came from a little village. Everybody knew everybody, from the oldest grandma to the youngest child. When you spend your whole life tending to fields and feeding pigs, you talk to whoever you can to pass the time."

My tale is very mundane, probably a bore to listen to for these young heroes.

"There were always these kids that kept trying to build a ladder down the side of the cliff. Took one broken arm for them to give up. Don't ask how I got a stiff elbow, alright! Haha!"

They've seen the bustling life of the city and experienced the action of adventure.

"You should've seen how my old man handled the neighbour's kids! He would rough up the boys with a stick, then give away sweets to the girls. It was unfair, I tell you!"

Yet here I am, talking about all the little things that happened in our middle of nowhere. There was no flow in the events I presented, just raw memories as they came to my old mind.

"Tried to ask a girl for her hand in marriage. You know what she told me? Said I was worth less than a pile of mud, and mud is at least good at keeping the pigs happy! Can you believe her!?"

I try my best to visualise every face, every name, every quirk. While I may not describe these people in much detail, I can see them clearly in my heart.

"After my old man was gone, I thought that I'd be alone in that hut until I die. Somebody else would come in and clean up the place for me once I was in the dirt."

Tears push towards the back of my eyelids every time I blink, but I push them back. I have these young heroes' attention and it would be bad manners to start crying halfway through. After all, I'm holding true to my little girl's dream.

"Then I found a little girl abandoned in the woods. Parents were travelers or something, but who cares. I took her in, and she brought light to that little shack of ours. Whatever room she entered suddenly became several times brighter."

I let one drop of water slip from the dam. All I can do is wait for it to travel down my cheek and into the soil. A heavy sniff later and I continue talking.

"She was such a good girl, would put all of you rascals to shame. Always so kind and put everyone else before herself. She did leave out the fish to dry for too long one time. Got it snatched by birds and all, but how could I ever be mad at her? She was always such an angel."

Her face is still clear in my mind. Even if I forget everything else, I want to hold onto at least this image.

"That was my little girl, my Sunflower."

Saying her name out loud, I allow Leon, Bernard, and Katherine to take her existence into their hearts. Now I'm not the only one to know her story. Her memory won't die with me.

"You see, Sunflower dreamed of moving to the city, using her wonderful voice to become famous and all. Then she was going to tell everybody about our little village, about her home. That girl, she was more than we deserved…"

Even if my vision is blurred, my head is clear. The answer that I may not have had yesterday comes naturally.

"Do I want to kill demons? Somewhere inside me probably still does. I lost everything, and demons were responsible."

The flames that smoldered inside my chest had threatened to consume me, and I nearly let them.

"But, the one thing I know for sure…"

That fire will never truly disappear, but I can watch it quietly burn alongside me. It's a part of me. However, something greater is also there inside.

"...Is that I don't want revenge."