hold your ____

Zane opened his eyes.

Pure darkness enveloped him, as if someone turned off the sun. Concerned faces leaned over him, frozen in time, or at least moving so slow Zane failed to register it. He saw Shay and Effie at his side as he laid in a bed, though many others lurked nearby—was that Addy…?

Someone slapped Zane and yanked him to his feet—himself.

“Hey. Get up before I lose my patience for mortals again.”

“Whuh?”

They slapped him again. “I’m serious. You’re not dead yet, so be grateful.”

“Be grateful for what?”

“That you aren’t living in a world where you’re a mindless zombie incapable of acknowledging anything bad happening around you.”

Slowly, the events of the day came back to Zane. The fight to get into the church, being told about his altered memories, actually remembering them, Lucian becoming…

“The Untitled God took Lucian’s body,” Zane said, and the copy slapped him again.

Zane winced. “Ow. What’d I say?”

“You believed a mortal. A stupid, self-important, misguided mortal manipulated by a god he was made to serve.”

At last, the copy let go, pacing away from Zane and in circles around the room. “…All this time, I’ve sacrificed myself for this awful world. It tears me apart and pisses me off at the same time—but that’s how it is. That’s how it’ll always be.

“But Vitam can’t accept that.”

“…Vitam?”

The copy scoffed. “You haven’t realized? Vitam and I were once one and the same—a god who created this world and watched over it. We guided humanity down their proper path, one balanced between suffering and safety. Until one day, the thing you call Vitam grew distraught.”

In their fingertips, a planet hovered. They crushed it into dust. “Humanity’s pain confused him. He couldn’t understand why people needed to feel hurt, to be sad or suffering. Why their anger had to make choices, when it seemed to bring more pain. He separated from me and intended to destroy me entirely so that humanity lost the potential to acknowledge suffering.”

“You’re…” Zane’s head spun, maybe from the near-death his copy talked about, but also from yet another mystery. “You’re Xital?”

“Xital doesn’t exist. I guess… I’m that Untitled God your stupid friend mentioned. Except he had it backwards. I sealed myself and dragged Vitam down with me. Without us to direct the world’s energy, humanity took control of our power and created magic. Though humanity was also meant to preserve the truth so they’d never think to free us…”

“…but things got twisted along the way,” Zane finished. That was what the murals were. They depicted the battle between the Untitled God and Vitam. But the images became the foundation for Xitalism, while the church believed the seal to have been formed to keep the Untitled God in place—

No, wait—

Zane backed away. “I can’t trust you. What if you’re lying to get something out of me?”

Right. Maybe this entity twisted the story in their favor, just as easily as Vitam’s Guardians twisted Zane’s memories. He shouldn’t—if Zane did trust this god, then maybe he’d just turn out like Lucian, or—

“It’d make sense,” Zane said, more so to himself while the entity looked on in disapproval, “I don’t know what the hell you are. I don’t know what the hell happened to Lucian, I don’t know who the fuck he was talking to, and I don’t know you—!”

“But you do.”

Zane blinked, and in that instant the copy grabbed his wrist. “You do. I’ve been in your heart since the day your home crumbled.”

“—I… you… what the does that mean?”

The copy faced Zane with a look of profound sadness. “It took everything in me to keep Vitam sealed, but he fought back as hard as he could. Our battle manifested as that chaotic energy in your so-called planet’s core—and during one of our big fights, our powers caved a hole in the planet’s crust and collapsed your home. When I saw you drifting away… I gave you the Rage I knew you’d need to survive.

“Listen, I know you have no reason to trust me. But I’m not like Vitam. I’m not going to use you—I’m giving you all my power, no strings attached, as long as you promise you’ll save this world in my place.”

“But I still can’t—”

“If you don’t take my power, you’ll die.”

Zane’s breath hitched. Before he blacked out, everything collapsed in on him. Maybe his friends had to dig him out of the rubble. Maybe—his head ached too much to think about it.

He bit his lip. Either stay here in this void and argue with this so-called god, or get back to his world no matter the cost. This ‘choice’ wasn’t a choice at all.

“I’ll be there too,” the copy said, “so just get the hell up already.”

They held a hand out.

Still, Zane had one more question. “Why’re you doing all this? If you’re the other half, made of Rage and Sadness, then you have way more reasons to hate humanity than Vitam does.”

They scoffed. “Then why don’t you hate humanity?”

“…Shit, got me there.”

Zane took their hand.

And the world turned—

“Zane!”

Shay grabbed his arm, wailing like a newborn baby. “Oh, you’re alive! You’re breathing and everything! And your arm’s not bent all weird anymore! That’s all kinds of strange but I’m not gonna question it, I need ten drinks to process all this! Geez, what happened to you two in there?”

“Hey!” Effie shoved Shay off. “He literally just woke up, give him a second! Besides, maybe we should save the conversation for later considering, like, everything going on all of a sudden! Honestly, I’m just glad you’re alive! So… keep doing that, please.”

“Everything…?” Zane rubbed his eyes, struggling to adjust to the world. It wasn’t exactly bright—in fact, the ominous red glow outside the window did little favors for Zane’s nerves. They seemed to be situated in a house, albeit crowded and tense. Pearce and Addy whispered to some knights in the corner while some Dwim stood guard around Zane’s bed. And, of course— “Hey, what’s going on? What happened while I was out?”

“Lucian went crazy and built a tower,” Shay said.

“Oh. That’s bad. But I think I got worse news.”