Chapter 2:

Cat-Girls & Robots & Friends, Oh My!

My Life Is Already Bad...I Don't Need A Cat-Girl Making It Worse!!


After a few minutes, I heard something tumble to the floor outside. She’s probably done, I thought to myself.

I left the room with a sigh. “Hey, Nisa,” I started but was soon shut down by the scene developing before me.

There she was with no pants on, and a shirt stuck above her head. Her arms and head were in the shirt, but it looked like her hands had gotten stuck in the shirt’s long sleeves. She flopped around in a panic, cutely growling as she struggled to get it on.

“Woah, Woah!” I let out as I tried approaching her.

It didn’t look like she was willing to listen to me or even knew I was there. Her tail was frizzled up and waved wildly.

Feeling like getting any closer would be a bad idea, I stopped some distance from her and tried to calm her down, “C-Can you calm down a bit?”

Unsurprisingly, she did not calm down.

Seeing a girl in her underwear growling and shaking from side to side was an odd sight, to say the least, but my main concern was the fact that she was making way too much noise. Regardless of the fact she was a catgirl, she still sounded more so like a human. I feared what people would imagine if anyone overheard the sounds she was making and the bumping of furniture and floor.

I took a deep breath.

With my resolve solidified, I apologized beforehand and jumped on top of her. Instantly I aimed for her arms, putting them down to her sides. Her head was freed, but she was still in a panic.

“OW!” I let out as she scratched my arm.

Nisa panicked, launching herself back and lowering her ears.

My arm felt like it had been stabbed. Blood started to spill from the opening.

H-How?! I thought to myself as I saw how deep the cut went.

I used to have a cat when I lived in my parent’s home, so I knew a thing or two about scratched by one. I also have a sister, so I knew what it was like to be scratched by a girl. However, this was far beyond what either cat or human could do. Not only was it deep, but it was also a perfectly straight line. It was like a razor-sharp knife had sliced right through it.

I quickly stood, covering the wound with my hand. As I did, I noticed Nisa curling into a ball and shivering.

I ran to the bathroom for the first aid kit, deciding to think about her behavior after I stopped spilling red all over the floor. However—

A silent hiss came from the metal box on the table. The back panel suddenly popped off, hitting my legs, and knocking me to the floor.

“Ow!” I yelled once more. I was apparently destined to be hurt by everything today.

Hello!” a voice I didn’t recognize said. “It looks like you’re hurt.

Before I could see the origin of that voice, I felt a cold substance flow into my wound. I snapped my head to my arm and found an odd sight before me.

There, was an upright rectangle made of metal with a red X on its chest. It had thin arms protruding from the sides and blocks of metal where the joints were supposed to be. It was on top of a grey volleyball-looking sphere oddly attached to the base. On top, being held up by a cylinder was a metal cube with a single red circle that looked like an eye and an upside-down triangle for the mouth.

“Aaaaand who are you?” I asked the robot as it finished spraying that white substance into my wound.

Honestly, I had already been blown away by the whole catgirl revelation, having a robot around really was a step-down from that.

Hello!” It said enthusiastically. “I am the ‘Robot Under Direct Order to Help Nick When the Cat Girl Inevitably Harms Him’ or the ‘RUDOHNWCGIHH’. But you can call me Bob.”

“Bob? How do you get Bob from all that?”

If you couldn’t tell, my creators weren’t the best at naming conventions.”

“Note taken,” I said as I looked at my arm.

Whatever that robot—Bob—had done, it had stopped the bleeding. It probably had some sort of pain relief properties too because it felt like the wound never existed.

“What did you do…here?” I pointed at my wound.

Trade secret, haha. It will help your body with the healing process.” Bob rolled side to side.

“Uh-huh.”

That whole catgirl thing really did a number on what I found shocking. At this point, I could believe anything. No questions asked.

While I sat there, Bob rolled up to Nisa who was still curled up in a ball. The moment it got close, Nisa hissed and scratched at it. Unsurprisingly, it did no damage.

I see you’re as energetic as usual.” It laughed as it tried to pat her white head.

Immediately, his arm was ripped off from the body.

“Um, is that going to be a problem?” I asked. “I wouldn’t want to be billed for her ripping you apart.”

I was supposed to take care of Nisa, so I was basically responsible for her actions. The last thing I was going to be able to do was afford to repair a robot of this caliber.

Worry not!” Bob said with what I think was a smile. At the very least, its little triangular mouth shined a bright yellow. “Look at this!” it said as it rolled over to its amputated arm.

With its other claw-like hand, it picked up the arm and easily reattached it to its body.

My creators were at least smart enough to think of this possibility. She’s done this plenty of times before. We’re basically best pals!

So apparently these two knew each other. Although the ravaging hissing and clawing didn’t indicate they had a good relationship.

“I’m going to make some ramen,” I said as I walked away from the situation.

There was an intelligent robot and a catgirl in my living room. Not a sentence I ever thought I’d have to think if in my life, yet here we were.

The knee-high robot, Bob, rolled up next to me. “I want one too!

“Can you even eat?”

Only one way to find out!


After finding out that Bob could definitely not eat, I made two cups of ramen. I usually wouldn’t waste this much in one day, but today was a special occasion. Most people drink their problems away, but I just eat ramen.

“Do you want some?” I put the cup on the table in front of Nisa.

She looked at it and her eyes glowed, but then she glanced at my arm and her ears when all floppy again.

“Are you still worrying about this?” I pointed at my arm. “You really don’t have to. Even if Bob wasn’t here, I still wouldn’t be mad at you. I know it was an accident.” I finished with a smile.

Her eyes looked indecisive. She kept glancing at my arm, then at my eyes, before looking back down.

Humans are sturdier than you think.” Bob rolled up near her. “Not as much as you and me, but—” his body and limbs were thrown every which way.

Nisa really didn’t seem to like him.

“Oh right!” I said as I ran back to the kitchen. I grabbed two pairs of chopsticks and placed one of them on top of the cup on the table. “There, now you can eat.”

She looked at me, then the cup.

Me.

Then cup.

Me.

Then cup.

This continued for a few minutes, until—

*BAM BAM*

Two loud slams rattled my front door. Within seconds, the door slammed open.

“Is the security of this apartment really that bad?” I asked myself.

“Definitely.” A voice answered. “You can even hear what other people are saying through the vents if you put your ear up to it.”

“Of course a creep like you would know that.” A female voice said.

Standing by the doorway were my only two friends in college: Vang and Ritsue.

Vang had short hair brushed to the side and freckles all over his cheeks. Like me, he wore basic uninspired clothes that were most likely randomly picked that morning.

Ritsue, on the other hand, had a complete look going on. She wore boot-like shoes that were all black with light accents of purple on the soles. Black tights with a long black skirt on top and a black long sleeve shirt to match. The shirt had a white design of some roses and stuff. Around her neck was a black and white chocker with small chains coming out from either side that hung loosely over her chest. Her hair was shoulder length and had hints of white highlights.

Although you’d usually see people like her wearing some sort of make-up as well, she was always adamant not to wear it. I couldn’t really understand why.

“O-Oh, hey you two…” I stuttered. “What bring you here?”

“Well,” Vang started. “We heard some weird sounds coming from your room, so we wanted to check if you were banging some chi—Ow!” Ritsue elbowed him on the shoulder.

“We were worried you got yourself in problems again.”

“Again?” I asked.

“Yeah, like that one time those guys came to beat you up cause they thought you were checking out one of their girls,” Ritsue explained.

“Oh right, that time.”

“Or” Vang started. “That one time you owed that guy next door money, so he tried to beat you up.”

“R-Right…”

“Or that other time—”

“Okay, okay, I get it!” I stopped Ritsue mid-sentence. “But no, I’m all good. I swear.”

The two of them looked me over. They got closer to me and spun circles around me like vultures. Suddenly, they stopped.

“He’s hiding something.”

“He’s definitely hiding something. No doubt about it!” Vang grabbed me by my neck and slammed me against the wall. “You better fess up.” He whispered.

“Or what?” I challenged.

“Ritsue. The ramen.”

“What are you going to do with my ramen?”

Ritsue went to the kitchen and found the bag filled with ramen still on the counter. She picked up two cups of them and put them in front of her so I could see them.

“We’re going to put them in the microwave.” Vang said.

“What about it? You can cook them in the microwave too.”

He brought his mouth closer to my ear and whispered the haunting words: “Without water…”

My eyes shot open. That would inevitably ruin the ramen, I knew that, and they knew it too. They were threatening me with starvation to get what they wanted. Those animals…

Through gritted teeth, I finally answered, “…Catgirl.”

“Whatcha say?”

I repeated myself, much louder this time, “Catgirl!”

The two of them looked at me like I had lost my mind. Maybe if I had given more context than just “catgirl” it would’ve made more sense to them, but oh well.

“Hehe, you take us for some fools, huh?”

Vang put me down and walked over to Ritsue. He grabbed one of the cups and put it in the microwave.

“No, wait!”

“Are you going to tell the truth?”

“I did!”

“I’m starting the timer.”

He pressed the timer for five minutes and was about to press start when suddenly—

Sorry to disturb you, but I’m going to pass through here!” Bob came in rolling from the living room.

““?”” The sudden introduction of a robot shocked both frozen in place. Then came the second surprise of the day for them.

“HISS” A thin white frame wearing nothing but her underwear came jumping from the living room too. Her white hair, tail, and ears were frizzled in anger.

With jaws agape, Vang and Ritsue looked at me, then at the robot, then at the Nisa. Neither was moving a muscle.

“I-I can explain...” I said defeatedly.

Nellien
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Senkosenpai
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Ochroleucous
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Momentie
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