3.2: All Alone Again

So that’s it, then… They really did up and leave me, and for what? Because I was a bit angry yesterday? Come on, didn’t that shorty prick say himself that we shouldn’t be divided? What’s the deal…

As I was busy pondering these questions all to myself, I drank the coffee I had the innkeeper brew for me. He asked why I wasn’t rushing anywhere, since I had explained to him the situation I was dragged into, starting from the ITA letter.

“I mean I understand you’re upset,” he said as he wiped down the empty beer mugs from last night, “but didn’t you say the ITA’s gonna be on your case if you don’t do this?”

“I did,” I answered back, calmly sipping my Latte, “but what can I do about it? They were the ones who left me, so I can just tell the ITA what happened truthfully. I’m not the one at fault here.”

“You sure?” he asked again, “Because if I looked at it from their perspective, they could just as easily lie about you to the ITA and say something like He went home on his own, thus putting the blame on you fully, no?”

At first I didn’t think that to be probable at all. Why would they do that? I thought, but things slowly started to make all too much sense and my suspicion (as well as my anxiety) started building up immensely. I had no idea what these dumbasses are capable of, I know barely any useful information on them, and vice versa. Cutting off one loose end doesn’t seem too difficult on their part, and they have no obligation to be nice to me in any way…

With that, I took a big swig of my Latte, finishing it off in record time, before paying and running over to the ITA.

“Don’t rush your drink…” the innkeeper tried warning me, “Your stomach isn’t gonna accept that much coffee that quick, y’know?”

***

Running with all my might to the ITA, my breaths were getting more and more ragged by the second. I guess that coffee really did a number on me… Even with that, I powered through, before making it to a location I’ve never been to.

“Huh…?” I stopped to reaffirm something, “Wasn’t the ITA Base supposed to be this way? Or wait, was it on the next one… Damn, I don’t know this place! I should’ve consulted the innkeeper, or payed attention to the signs more or something!”

I ran around from block to block, from street to street, but I simply couldn’t find it anywhere. It was as if nothing went my way ever since this damned trip started… Just then, I stopped to gather my thoughts.

“Okay, so my options from here on out are: Go back home to talk it out with the ITA and hope I wasn’t falsely accused of being a deserter” I said, “Or: Just go on my own and hope I can catch up to them in time.”

I reasoned that traveling alone wouldn’t be that different than traveling with these fucks, and with how wacky and not-so-serious they all looked, I’m sure I could not only catch up to, but even surpass them with ease! As such, I went with the latter option of the two and boarded another transport wagon to Melgam.

“Finally, some peace and quiet.” I thought as I noticed how empty the wagon was, “I should make a point of traveling in the morning from now on…”

Thinking back now, the last time I traveled alone on a transport wagon was… When I was 5? I remember trying to run away from home even back then, but my parent’s quickly found me and I got a stern talking to, not to mention I got the biggest grounding of my life. God, it takes me back…

As I fondly remembered my parents and my time back in Whitehood, I remembered another dear friend who hails from there.

Speaking of, I wonder how Ed’s doing? He said he was going back to Trivis Numerica, but he never mentioned where to exactly… I guess he’s going back to Whitehood, since he used to always complain about missing his parents. Oh, but then again, he did say:

“You explore your side of the world, and I’ll explore mine.”

Does this mean he hasn’t given up on our grand adventure yet? On one hand I sure hope so, but on the other hand I wouldn’t want to see him have to deal with any of this nonsense that I’m dealing with now… God, I wish I could visit Trivis Numerica myself. I’d go with him, Nelly and Cecily, and maybe some of the Generals, like Aaron. I remember he said he was from Secundis, same as Ed and I.

We could all go and visit my home village, I could introduce Cecily to my parents, and it’d be a blast! Then we’d go visit Anna and Arthur over at Springwood. I bet Arthur’s gonna have a heart attack when he hears about Nelly! (Actually, I don’t wanna jinx it…)

Anna… Now that I remember, she did say she’s branching Arthur’s to a global scale, but I wonder how far she’s come with that project. Trivis Numerica is mostly done, but the world is vast… No, they’ll make it! They have each other to rely on, unlike me…

Jumping from one thought to the other, I slowly drifted off to sleep. On second thought, it’s gotten way too quiet for my liking. I’ve made so many good friends on this journey so far, and yet here I am, sitting in an empty transport wagon. (I guess this is what Aaron would consider ‘poetic’?)

***

Wooohooo! Dream world! I realized where I was. I haven’t been here in ages! Must be because of the coffee! That innkeeper gets full credit!

I was quite ecstatic over the fact I was aware of being in a dream. The reason for this is purely a hypothesis of mine, but when I was young I once figured out I could control my dreams if I realized I was dreaming. When I asked the other kids about it, they just told me outright It’s impossible to control your dreams, idiot! But I knew for a fact that it was, since I had the proof in my head!

It’s occurred a couple more times since then, but the last time was definitely before I started this journey, so… 4 years at the very least. In any case, I tested my abilities out by thinking up the ability to soar through the sky. It was extremely intuitive, and I felt as free as a bird as I flew through the clouds. It was like second nature, in a way, I wonder if flying would be this fun in real life... After flying around for a good while, I perched myself back on the ground before remembering the ones I held dearest to my heart…

I wanna see Cecily and Nelly so bad! I thought.

As quickly as I expressed my wishes, these two materialized right in front of me. Cecily wore her leisure wear, and she held a sleeping Nelly in her arms as she quietly sang her the lullabies that she knew.

"Nelly, say hi to dada!" Cecily waved to me.

"Ah." Nelly tried her best to pronounce the word, but ultimately failed and went back to sleep. Cute...

I never did ask this, Cecily, but how do you know so many lullabies?

She paused for a second before answering, “I used to sing these to Carter when he would have nightmares…” She then continued to sing to Nelly in a calm tone.

I wonder if this is actually true, or just my dream telling me what I wanna hear? Carter… I really do miss him, and I’m sure she misses him more. Why’d you have to leave us, man? But wait… If I can make even the impossible happen, like flying around, then surely seeing him here and talking to him like before is possible as well, no?

Thinking up the phrase I wanna see Carter! I noticed something start to materialize. It… It was him… It’s really him!

Carter! We’ve missed you so much! I said as I gave him a bear hug.

“Yeah,” said Cecily, “how long has it been since we last saw you?”

“…mare…” he murmured something.

Did you say something? I asked, Speak up, bud!

“NightmarenightmarenightmarenightmareNightmareNightmare…” he said the same word multiple times.

Nightmare?

“NightmareNightmareNIGHTMARENIGHTMARENIGHTMARENIGHTMARENIGHTMARE”

NIGHTMARE!

“Gaaaaaaaah!!!” I woke up, scaring the driver.

“The hell’s your problem, dumbass! Want me to go off-road or something?!?” he scolded me.

“Sorry, I had a pretty intense nightmare.” I tried explaining.

“Nightmare? Seriously? Come on man, you’re not a kid anymore! Fuck’s sake…” he grumbled.

But what the hell did that dream mean? I asked myself. Just then the driver abruptly stopped the wagon.

“Uuh, everything alright?” I asked as I peeked my head out the front of the wagon, only to see the driver leaned forward with an arrow through his head.

“What?!?” I screamed, quickly grabbing my weapon as I jumped out of the wagon.

“Well well, looky here!” A voice emerged from the surrounding bushes, “Guess nothing's that easy in our line of work!”

Suddenly, a ton of people started laughing at this person’s joke, leading to them revealing themselves to me.

“Who are you guys?!” I yelled back at them with my sword unsheathed.

“Ooh, a fighter, how dangerous~!” he jeered, “But, since you asked so nicely, I’m gonna tell ya’! There are some who call us… bandits, and we’re gonna be needing you to hand over all of your stuff, y’see.”

“Over my dead body!” I lashed back at them, “I need this stuff!”

“That can be arranged, friend~!” The bandit spoke up, provoking me further.

Can’t fucking catch a break on this damned trip…