Chapter Nineteen - Missed

“I haven’t had such a good night’s sleep since the hospital.” Said no one ever. For a place that often prescribes rest for the ailments afflicting their customers the entire environment seems hell-bent on not allowing it for anyone. Between hourly nurse visits to poke and prod and the incessant beeping from the machines there is little chance to get much of it.

As the sun crept reluctantly over the mountains to the east, I found myself staring at the black empty rectangle of my phone, my haggard face reflected in its smooth glass. It had been half an hour and I still hadn’t turned it on. The nurse took my meager breakfast away and I was soon left alone.

What if she’d left me a bunch of messages? What would I even say? Both Saki and Emi told me to talk with her, but what could I say? “You flirted with me a few times and I know you can do anything and anyone you want, but I hate it and it hurts my feelings. Even though we’re nothing but friends and I’m kind of a creeper, I guess, but I got butt-hurt.” Oh, yeah, Kasumi, real smooth there. God. I really was kind of cringey.

Worse yet, what if she hadn’t left me any messages at all? Well, at that point in time, I supposed, I would simply chalk everything up to my over-active imagination and have to move on with my life secure in the knowledge that only Emi and Saki knew the truth of the matter and they’d never tell. I jumped as the door opened, the doctor from the day before strolling in.

“Ah, good to see you awake this morning, young lady.” He said without really looking at me. He picked up the chart and flipped through the pages, nodding. “You’re making great progress and aren’t contagious anymore, so I think we’re on our way to a complete recovery.” I opened my mouth to say something but only a useless gasp came out. If this was “on our way” I didn’t want to know what “not doing well” turned out to be.

“So, if we keep making progress you can go home in a couple of days, I think,” he continued on, still not looking at me. “You’ve had quite a few visitors wanting to come see you. I’m sure we can get a couple in this afternoon if you want.” He looked at me for the first time and I nodded. It would be nice to see my friends. “All right, Kasumi. Just get some rest and you’ll be home in no time.” He flicked the smile on and off again before turning and walking out. He seemed like a fine doctor, but his bedside manner left a lot to be desired, in my opinion.

I turned my attention back to my intimidatingly blank cell phone and bit my lip nervously. Well, I finally decided, nodding my head imperceptibly as if I’d had some deep and meaningful revelation, time to rip the band-aid off. I pressed and held down the button and the screen came to life. I keyed in my code on the cute anime girl lock screen (seriously, the screen was literally called cute anime girl when I downloaded it. Not the height of originality but, admittedly, she was cute) and waited as the phone loaded in. I kept my eyes glued on the top of the screen as everything continued to load. Wait. What? 264 messages? What the hell?

I opened the messages app and cocked my head to the side. 209 messages from Aria? 37 voice mails? Well, I had my answer as to whether she would message me or not. I realized I had been holding my breath and exhaled finally. The last message was 9 minutes ago. I tapped the screen to open the app.

Please! I talked to my uncle, so I know you’re ok but please please please text or call me! It’s an emergency!

Uncle? What uncle? What was she talking about? I cocked my head to the side and nearly dropped the phone as it buzzed signaling another text had come in. I refreshed the screen and Aria’s latest text appeared.

You finally read one of my texts! Don’t leave me on read! Call or text me! Please!

What was she doing? Sitting in her room with her phone in her hand refreshing whether I’d read her texts or not? That was…well, I guess it was sweet in its own way but also kind of creepy. Of course, I’d done the same thing, really, the entire trip to Hiroshima, so I couldn’t judge her too much.

So, now I had my answer as to whether she’d text me. The question was, what to do about it? I had turned it over and over in my mind to the point it was all jumbled up but wasn’t any closer to an actual answer. What should I say to her? Why so many texts? If I didn’t know better, she was acting like someone who had been caught doing something wrong and was trying to ascertain the level of damage done. Of course, as I’d decided previously, we were nothing to each other except friends. I steeled myself and typed:

Sorry, I’ve been out of it for a couple days as you, obviously, know. I need to talk to you, but my voice is gone. The doctor said I’ll be out in a couple of days. I’ll meet you at Koyamaike Park on the benches to the right of the bridge when you get out of school Monday at 4.

I read the text over and over before nodding my head. Yes. It sounded reasonable and not too clingy, nor too harsh, though it did sound formal, but I couldn’t think of a better way of saying what I wanted. I pressed the send button and relaxed, my back ached from how tense it had become without me even being aware.

Now, I guess, it was time to read over the messages I’d been left. I had to admit, the period of time after I’d tried to call her was of particular interest to me. Scrolling up the list of messages left gave the impression of someone vacillating between breezy dismissal of the call and panicked pleading. I finally reached the first message after the call and opened it.

I’m sooo sorry! My cousin answered my phone! He’s such a jerk sometimes! I tried to call you and Emi, but you didn’t answer, and she said you’d gone to bed ☹ ☹ ☹ I’ll text you in the morning! You’re mad at me, huh? Please don’t be mad at me!!!!!

Cousin, huh? I scowled. I hadn’t considered a cousin. I hated things falling outside of expected parameters. I figured since she was new to Japan the only male who could be answering her phone would be one she was dating or…well, fucking, I guess. I hadn’t counted on this new tidbit of information. I switched over to the voicemail app and listened to the oldest message she’d left me which would have been the one she left when I refused her call in Hiroshima.

“I’m so sorry, K-chan!” Aria’s disembodied voice said from the speaker as I held the phone up to my ear. “My cousin’s an ass! I kicked him out of my room so please call me back! I promise he won’t answer! Pretty please?!”

I nibbled on my lip again, capturing it between my teeth and scowled. This was unexpected indeed. You mean to tell me all of this was simply a misunderstanding? That sort of thing happened in manga all the time but stuff like that happening in real life seemed remote. She’d never mentioned this “cousin” before. I mean, there really wasn’t a reason to, I guess. Gah! I dropped the phone between my legs onto the blanket and scowled at it. What a pain in the ass. I’d gone from having the moral high ground to being the clueless agitator in the blink of an eye and I didn’t care for the twist at all.

The phone buzzed as if reacting to my self-inflicted moral dilemma and I picked it up. Aria had replied. I flicked the message notification with my finger.

Ok. I will meet you at the park on Monday at 4. I’m sorry, Kasumi. I really really am. I hope you forgive me because I love you and don’t want you to be mad at me. I won’t bother you since I know you’re trying to rest. Get better! I’ll see you then!

“I love you.” I scowled. What the hell did that mean? Seriously? What did it mean? I love you like, “I love you like you’re my bosom buddy” or “I love you and want to dip my tongue in your Ramune pouch” love? A vivid image of Aria’s tongue and where she could dip it flashed in my mind and I blushed fiercely. I really had to take care of some business as soon as I got home, I decided.

Drawing my attention away from my lewd thoughts reluctantly I fixated on those three words once again. “I love you.” Fuck. What did that mean? Should I ask? Would I look stupid if I asked? “Hey, what do you mean by ‘I love you’? Who’s going to be the husband? HAHAHA!” No. That was moronic. My fingers hovered over the keys, twitching as if they wanted to type something but without receiving any sort of detailed instruction from my brain they merely flailed about helplessly.

Ok.

I finally typed and sent and dropped the phone in exhaustion. The mental circles I was racing through had tired me out and I lay back with my eyes closed as if I’d just run a marathon. I coughed and winced as it felt like my throat was on fire. I wiped the back of my hand over my lips and found, to my relief, there was no blood. Thank god. I didn’t need exsanguination crap on top of Aria’s crap. There was, after all, only so much crap I could cope with in one day. My eyes closed for just a moment and I was asleep.

“Kasumin!!!” The voice ripped through the relative quiet of the room like a gunshot and I shot upright, my eyes opening in shock and fear as I stared around me. What the hell was going on? Emi marched toward me from the door, followed by Mizuki and, finally, Saki. It had, of course, been Emi who had scared the shit out of me. Mizuki seemed slightly embarrassed as she followed behind and Saki seemed back to her normal, small animal self, timid and uncertain.

“This is a hospital, Emi,” Mizuki chastised her, glancing around nervously. Emi ignored her and bounced onto the bed beside me, hugging me tight before glancing back at Mizuki and sticking her tongue out.

“So?” Emi sniffed. “This is Kasumin! I haven’t seen her in forever!”

“It’s been two days, Emi. Sorry, Kasumi,” Mizuki shook her head ruefully. “Emi thought you were going to die so she’s a bit rambunctious.”

“I did not think she was going to die!” Emi puffed her cheeks out with displeasure.

“Wh-what am I going to do?’” Mizuki sobbed mockingly, trying to imitate Emi while grabbing onto Saki’s shoulder for imaginary support. “If Kasumin dies we’ll never get pubic hair together! We’ll never brush our luxurious locks of velvety down there hair and talk about conditioning! She has to be ok! Tell me she’ll be ok! What do I do!?” Saki looked around vainly for a hole to crawl into and I cocked an eyebrow quizzically at Emi who was blushing fiercely and scowling.

“I never said that!” Emi protested angrily. She looked down in humiliation. “I mean, not in those terms exactly. Why are you mocking me?”

“Because you’re funny when you’re worried,” Mizuki grinned.

“You were worried, too!” Emi snapped, doing her best Mizuki impression. “What if my best friend dies? I’ll only have Yuto and his stupid lizard to lean on for support and I won’t let Emi talk to me about what’s bothering her because Yuto is calling and I’m a big jerk!”

“I knew she’d be ok,” Mizuki sniffed.

“That is not what you were saying on the train! Oh! My! God! Lying children don’t get birthday gifts so now you have to give me all of yours! You were all ‘She looks bad! What do I do? What do I do? What if she dies? Don’t die! Waaah!’” Emi shot back.

“W-Well, so were you!”

“Was not!”

“Were too!”

“Ok, maybe a little. But you were worse!” I finally had to step in. I folded Emi in my arms and hugged her tight before gesturing Mizuki closer to hug her and then, finally, Saki as well. I had missed them more than I could have imagined.