The Tale of how I Fought an Edgelord Hero (Part 1)

" About the demon lord, we should talk. " Those words echoed through my head in my final moments before rest. Luckily we had money to afford rooms in the guild. Unfortunately though they were about as comfortable as a Spanish donkey(the torture device, I mean), even so it was nice to finally get some rest.

Suddenly I felt an odd groping feeling on my right pec. Immediately I shot up.

 " What the hell! " I turned to see a highly confused Graxia her hand still tightly embracing my mooby.

" This is tradition isn't it? Wait what about Makono? Shouldn't she be educated as well? " Graxia asked with an innocent look on her face.

And then I was left with an impossible decision, I could grope Makono to my left and risk death, or I could tell Graxia that this whole groping session is built on lies, and risk death.

What a situation to be in, how did this happen?

A few hours earlier Lux was explaining. " For now you should get rest. Having the demon lord alone for too long is dangerous even here, to be safe you should share a room. "

Makono growled in anger " Stop talking like I'm not here! Fine I'll share a room with him! But only because he knows if he tries anything. I'll.. " 

 " Kill me? " I interrupted sarcastically.

 " I'm coming too! "

And that about explains it.

As my hand reached for Makono's chest part of me wished that someone would burst through the door and force me to stop. But it never happened.

I placed my hand on her chest gently as to not wake her.

 " Now squeeze! " Graxia exclaimed as she did the same.

 With my mooby taken hostage I had no choice, I could say at least that the demon lord had one hell of a rack. They were not too big to smell of seventy year old milk in any case of heat, but they were big enough to provide a good squish.

Makono shot up so quickly her hat fell off, I could see Graxia drool at the sight of her adorable fox ears riddled with bed head.

 " What did I say I'd do if you tried anything? Something about, killing you? " I saw pure hatred emitting from Makono's eyes.

With my free hand I tried to defuse the situation " Wait I can explain. It's a tradition! "

That seemed to calm her down, but not enough. " What tradition? " She sneered.

 " When you wake up you immediately grope the person to your left, the earlier the better. " Once again I used the same lie hoping it would have similar effects.

 " Do you think I'm dumb? As if something so retarded actually exists! " I closed my eyes thinking that at least if I was to die I'd have somebody's love muffin in my hand. " There is nobody to my left! So who would I grope!? "

 " Oh. It's like a circle. In this scenario you'd grope Graxia that way everyone gets fair groping. " The more I spoke the dumber I sounded.

 Makono didn't even reach for Graxia and for some reason I was disappointed a little. " My arms are too short! I'll just grope you! "

Suddenly my savior walked in. A pair of floppy rabbit ears sat atop her head as she burst through the door in a superman stance.

Usagi's face turned red as a strawberry as she broke her stance to shield her eyes though she was obviously peeking through her fingers. " Wha.. What is going on!? " I began to think what this looked like from her perspective. To my left was Makono groping my chest as I groped hers, while she was close enough count my stubble(had I any that is). On my right was Graxia also groping me but she had a steady stream of drool falling from her face looking incredibly ecchi. 

 " Um. Tradition? "

Putting the awkwardness aside Lux was waiting in his office for us with a very much shaken Usagi at his side.

 " Did you get the rest you needed? " He asked in a generous tone.

" Didn't I tell you Lux! They were totally bumping fuzzies! Rolling in the hey!? Playing wheelbarrow!? Introducing Mr. P To Mrs. V!? "

" What! You dumb rabbit! Your delusional! I was simply learning his very pervy traditions! " Makono protested.

" Nothing pervy. Just groping the person to your left. " Graxia added.

" Is this true? Lux your father came from the same world as Tokuma. Is this really the case? "

I looked to Lux with pleading eyes as everyone else looked to him in curiosity. I swore to him with my eyes "I'm not a perv I swear. At least no more then every other teenage boy." 

Luckily it seemed he read my eyes " I wouldn't know first hand. But my dad did say something about a morning tradition involving groping the person to your left. So perhaps he's telling the truth. " Lux whimpered under Usagi's pressure.

" Give me a real answer! "

" YES! It's in fact tradition to grope the person to your left in the world of heroes! Now can we please get to the matter at hand! " Lux outburst surprised us all but I was also very grateful he kept the act up. And slightly terrified as to what my future held in store.

" So the demon lord. There's a few things you have to know about her. " I assumed Usagi was in on this since she didn't even flinch as she stood beside Lux's chair. " Do you know what the aura of malice is? "

Makono looked down in shame, a gesture I couldn't understand at the time.

" It's an aura the demon lord produces with the power to corrupt heroes and high priestess alike. Most commoners just know it as the omen of the demon lord, but for whatever reason those who don't have any connection with Thanatos don't seem to have as potent symptoms. It's primary ability is to amplify any dormant emotions in you such as anger, fear, sorrow, grief. In Graxia's case it amplified her greed and lust. "

" What! I am not greedy! " Graxia pouted, ironically enough as she did guld coins she fetched from the treasury fell from her bosom. " Fine I'll prove it! "

Graxia stormed off, we figured she'd be back soon so we didn't bother to stop her.

" Anyways, you seem to have a resistance to the aura for whatever reason and that is good. But remember it's not a complete immunity. "

I recalled my fight with Musashi, I almost died because of my anger. Could that have been the aura? 

" I'm only half hero so the aura doesn't effect me much, but for you. When you get into a fight you have to be careful to not get riled up, if you do the aura with take hold resistant or not. Most heroes lose their mind but I've never seen one like you, perhaps the effect is even worse. "

The room was enveloped in momentarily silence between us four.

Suddenly I heard a thundering explosion echoing through the air then two more.

Lux looked out of the window and soon the window was covered in the four of us as we peeked out 

outside was a guy my age dressed in a long black cloak trimmed in crimson red, his eyes were a bloodthirsty red and his hair was a peerless white that hurt to look at in the blazing sun. On his left eye was an eye patch like mine but even edgier, in his hand was a model 500 Taurus raging bull revolver, it was pure red with a black lightning design engraved in it. 

" I've got some intel a demon lord is here! " The guy shouted as he shot his gun three more times into the air. He turned his back swiftly as his cloak flapped dramatically in the wind that was not there. On the back of his cloak was an insignia of a decapitated oni as a three droplets of blood fell from it's neck.

Lux's eyes widened at the sight. " Usagi tell the rest of the adventurers to stay. Don't let them fight him, they'll die. Tokuma you have to stop him, I'll watch Makono. I'd fight if I could but if he sees me or the demon Lord, the organization he's working for will destroy all of Lyrn to find me and kill Makono. "

Everyone was taken aback by the obvious sincerity in Lux's voice but the way he spoke demanded our attention, even Makono didn't protest.

Without asking anything I made my way past Usagi as she was calming the adventurers down.

 " What was that explosion? We're adventurers we can handle ourselves. " 

The commotion was getting louder so I slipped out.

" And you are? You don't have red hair, nor a aura of malice that's still coming from inside, so obviously your not the demon lord. so that means, are you a hero? " The man spoke in a edgy gruff voice as I left the guild. " I don't need your help. I can take him by myself. "

The guy started to walk past me when I grabbed his arm stopping him in his tracks.

" Are you getting in my way! " He scoffed in disdain. " I'm afraid you just made a fatal mistake. You've made yourself an enemy of me Miyamoto Hajime. The hero who will slay the demon lord and kill anyone or anything that gets in his way. "

He pointed his gun at me. Up close I could tell it shared some uncanny resemblance to the red door in Makono's castle as far as materials go.

Right in front of his barrel I made a invisible portal that led to his ankle.

" Why is there magic in front of me? And why can't I see it? " Miyamoto released himself from my grip and created distance between us, a good strategy for a long distance fighter.

" You can sense magic then? Great. " his ability to sense magic would be troublesome, now greater illusions would be much less effective. " Don't suppose you'll tell me how? "

A bullet nicked my check as it flew by my head blasting a hole through the guild wall.

" What the hells your problem!? You could've killed someone! " I could feel the aura of malice taking root so I quickly calmed down.

" Casualty of war. What's one life out of a whole world? "

I gritted my teeth together trying to remain calm and think of a plan.