Her Plan is Flawless!

The red-haired girl who had left with me was now walking in front of me. She carried herself so effortlessly; her slightly skipping steps were the complete opposite of the hefty dragging of my feet. But as we were wandering in search of a less busy place to finalize our business, there wasn’t even a moment of the kind of awkward silence I had suffered through when it had been just me and her two friends.

“I can’t believe you agreed to something so stupid with no hesitation! I have a feeling we’re gonna get along”, she giggled, looking at me over her shoulder.

“It was a reflex. I’m practically married to Neri-nee already”, I grinned back.

It was difficult to contain my excitement whenever I gazed at her and fortunately, I didn’t have to. I couldn’t help but smile at the mercy of such a merry sight.

“I support that. Long live self-insert supremacy!” she proclaimed.

In the end, we decided to step out from the stuffy karaoke place altogether – I doubt that sorry excuse of a building even had any air conditioning. Though, in all honesty, the sultry heat of the summer evening that was waiting for us on the other side was barely less suffocating.

The dusky parking lot was nearly unoccupied but it made sense. After all, the establishment was filled with a bunch of minors, most of whom had likely made their way over here through means that didn’t require owning a motored vehicle.

I felt a light tap on my shoulder – I assumed it was the redhead's way of indicating she wanted my attention. After having confirmed that I was actually listening, she started to talk.

“First things first, I have my priorities in a weird order. I’m sorry but... also kind of not. I got so excited I forgot to ask for your name! So, who are you?”

The chiming laughter punctuating her sentences left its mark on the moment in the form of a slightly haunting echo.

“Well, I’m Kakuji Ran but I don’t mind nicknames. My best friend calls me Kujiran, as in a whale. You know, because of my gacha addiction”, I presented.

“Ah, that’s funny! I like it. Is it okay if I use it too?” she asked.

“Go ahead. How about you, what do you want me to call you?” I inquired.

The girl leaned forward a little with both hands behind her back and started her self-introduction without skipping a beat. It was a dauntless speech by someone, who had assuredly done it countless times before.

“Nice to meet you, Kujiran! I’m Hajime, family name Aiko. Feel free to call me by either one. You can even call me Neri-nee if you want to! But that’s only eligible after accepting the terms and conditions of my contract proposal.”

“Good to know. What do you have in mind?”

I didn’t want to be kept in the dark for any longer. Luckily, Hajime was just as eager to demonstrate her plan.

“To be honest, I’ve always fantasized about a situation like this, so I know exactly what I want to do! Since it’s summer break and all, we should date, like a couple. But not as each other. To you I’m Neri and to me you’re Mikarin. We can alternate personas fairly between dates. And to show you how serious I am, I’m willing to be your darling first. Any questions?”

There it was. And what a great plan it was indeed – I sure let it show on my face. To be honest, I too had entertained the thought of a friends with benefits type of relationship with someone resembling my adorable Neri-nee. It’s just that until this evening, a scenario like that had felt about as plausible as me getting a girlfriend in the first place.

“Also, is physical contact okay with you? Because to me it’s basically the essence of this contract but if that’s beyond your boundaries, I won't go there!” she ensured.

Not only was I touching grass, I had also been granted with the opportunity of graduating from the infamous kissless virgin status?! I was ready to sign. I could’ve given her my left testicle as a warranty. I could always become a wizard in my next life.

“I’m... fine with it as long as you are. And speaking of questions, I’ve got another one. When’s the first date?” I smirked.

Once again, I earned a little laugh from her side. She seemed like the type to be easily amused but I was proud of myself nonetheless. I’m glad being friends with Iruka had trained me into quite the talented banterist despite not getting much social stimulation on the whole.

Speaking of the devil: not too long after our agreement had been properly verbalized, my phone started buzzing in my pocket. For the second time today already, Iruka had interrupted my effort at engaging in pleasant contact with someone else than him. Did he have a built-in yandere reflex or something?

I signaled a subtle apology to my companion before answering the call. As soon as I did, the guy on the other end started whining.

“Are ya even here dude?”

“Yes, I have been trying to reach you for the past hour or so, in case you didn’t notice”, I annotated.

“Well, where here?” he insisted, completely ignoring my snarky remark! He was one sore loser.

“Actually, it’s a long story. I’m outside at the moment”, I stated.

"Come and tell it to me then. I’ll meet you in the lobby in mere minutes!” Iruka demanded as he hung up.

I simply shrugged and sighed in response to my best friend's incorrigible behavior.

“Sorry, I have to go soon. I promised my friend I’d meet up with him. He’s kind of the reason I came here today in the first place but because he didn’t answer my messages, I ended up bursting into your room. And well, you know the rest”, I explained.

Hajime wasn’t shaken up by my sudden announcement.

“Don’t worry about it, we’ll be seeing each other plenty, hopefully! Are you working this summer?”

“Yeah, whaling is quite the strain on my wallet. But I’m willing to cast my heart into a volcano and donate my brain for suspicious scientific experiments if it’s for Neri-nee's sake!” I declared.

“Woah, I totally feel you! You’ve got such a way with words. Cute and cool are about the only adjectives in my vocabulary and it’s so frustrating! I want to be able to express my love for Mikarin better, he deserves it", she wailed.

“Thanks, that mainly comes out when it comes to her though. I think everybody feels like that with their favorites sometimes. Even I feel like nothing I do for Neri-nee is enough to express how much I love her, it’s painful!” I agonized.

She kept nodding vigorously in agreement of everything I said. I was sure her head could’ve fallen off her shoulders at any moment.

“Anyway, since Neri-nee is due for an event, I’ve been taking it easier with the summer shifts. It’s not as much of a hurdle to call in sick when there are just a few shifts to skip. Next week I’m only working on the weekend”, I revealed.

“You’re so shameless! I love it”, she scolded playfully. “How’s Monday sound then?”

“Sounds great. I’m too impatient to wait any longer anyways”, I laughed.

Once we had gone back inside, I had to admit that the slight wind blowing outside had been more of an asset in keeping my body temperature in control than what I had given it credit for: just a couple steps inside the building put me in a state of complete exhaustion. However, I tried my best to keep up credible appearances in the company of my newfound, exceptionally good-looking ally.

As a last deed before our divergence, I escorted Hajime back to her friends. After all, she was basically my girlfriend now! We exchanged contact info and goodbyes in the same doorway we had met at approximately 30 minutes ago.

"See you on Monday, Kujiran!" she waved with a dazzling smile.

"Looking forward to it, Neri-nee!” I smiled back.

As the door in front of me closed once and for all, I had to do everything in my power not to collapse right then and there. Every single one of the emotions I had experienced during the evening was raging violently, demanding to be expressed. And that’s how it came to be: the heaviest sigh I had ever breathed in my life.