Chapter 4 Providence

What is with that guy , we just met yesterday and now I am his girlfriend!?Just because his parents and mine agreed to it doesn't mean that I do too. If I would be in a relationship ,I want that to be my own decision , and not anyone else. Because that is how it supposed to be . I rushed to the science department library and hid in the corner. At least it is the least of the places they think of to find me.

Books are not my thing ,because they are tedious and sometimes boxed the minds of its readers by stating specific , single and easiest most efficient way to get to things or to know things. I just read a few pages and learn the rest by experiencing firsthand. That is why I don't like the library much . Because to me it is another prison.

I sat on the edge of a shelf , leaning my back against it. Though its not directly in front of me , I still can see the stain –glass window, that really made this library famous. I rest my bag in my cross-leg lap and plug in my earbuds and listen to music.

A stereotype music like me would have listened to instrumental classical music, however I don't follow that standardization., I prefer variety , pop rock , classic , jazz, anything that is unpredictably beautiful.

I spend my all day class time on that library. For some ironic reason , I felt peace being here. That same feeling that I feel when I am inside my room. Throughout this day , my folks tried to contact me but I shot them down every single time. I don't want to be bothered so I turned on the flight mode of my phone. Besides if I answer one their calls , they'll just make me apologize for speaking up my mind. Pretty sure they will be waiting for me at that house with frown faces and tons of words. I feel like I don't want to go home...no... I don't want to go home. I felt suffocated there , I am not even allowed to make my own friends. All of the kids I played with before are just the kids of their business partners wanting to get close to my parents. Now that I think of it I don't have any friends , and my parents are always against me .... I am just a lonely child.

I heard the sound of a wood scratching a concrete floor , a chair being pulled is my best guess . A slight thud on a wooden surface , the table probably , suggest that something is being put down , since this is the library it is probably just some books. Seems like I dozed off a bit and my earbud fell off. I looked at my time and its almost 3 pm., looks like I really did took a nap. The thought of going home run through my mind. I really don't want to go home. I grabbed my purse and thank God for I still have cash , for I don't really want to go home. So I decided to stay at a local hotel for the night. I stood up slowly and felt pain in my calves and thighs like many needles pricking them. I waited for a minute for it to subside and stretch my back and arms grab my fallen bag , re-plug in my earbuds and off I go.

In my phone plays a ,music of a different language, though I don't understand it , the melody sets the mood and I always got swayed by it. I walk by the shelf that I have left , my thighs are still a bit sore so I walk slowly . As I walk pass the shelf , from the corner of my eye I saw him. A man lighted by the stained glass window with a dignified posture reading a book. Seems normal but to me , in tandem with the music and the kaleidoscopic light of the stained glass window , this , I mean he is "a divine intervention , a God sent subject " that I need to capture.

Spiky dark brown hair , back leaning outward in a sitting position , both hands resting on the table while holding a book which he is reading , eyes that is dived in fully on the book , and kaleidoscopic rays of the stained glass window , complemented this still image which I need...I WANT TO PUT TO A CANVAS.

It was as if time literally slowed down as I turn to look at him directly to see every detail of his being. Though its on sideways and I can barely the whole of his eyes, I can perceive a slight glimmer in it. Like a child being able to play in a wide open play ground.Moments past after another and I still cant help but to stay still and observe and my instincts tells me to get close to him ,to touch him , to see him clearer at close proximity, but my brain tells me that if move or make a sound , he will notice me, and like a gazelle he will run like hell to get away from the lioness. Even so , I wanted to pounce on him, to ensnare him , to capture his whole being so I took a step and for a second he shivered and turn to look at my direction. That moment I saw the truth in his eyes .The glimmer is there , however the child is alone in that open playground. Deserted and misunderstood. Those eyes are beautiful but sad. Seeing it heighten my urges to surrender to my instinct. He looked at me for a moment and turned away to continue on his reading.

To some he is an ordinary man reading to kill time but to me , he is a gazelle gave up of running and exposed his vitals to his predator. So I surrendered to my instincts again like I always do and move to him inside his personal space with an intent to examine every inch of his face. He turned to me and our eyes met , I think he is stoned for he just remained still and silent for a moment. I could hear his breathing clearly because of this silence.

"what can I do for you ?"-he asked , in almost a whisper.

I think he is really nervous to have someone suddenly invade his personal space, well I guess that goes for everybody. So I move back a bit , his eyes seemed to sighed in relief. Which I interrupted by touching his eyebrows with my fingers .I stroked my finger down his cheekbone to the center of his lips. I move closer to examine his lips , every crack. After each touch , I impulsively utter something that would usually mean "oh . I get it."

I've finished examining his front face features and I pushed his right cheek to observe his side face. Particularly the positioning of his ear.

"could you tell what you are trying to accomplish after moving away a bit"-he uttered which brought me back to reality that I am already on top of a complete stranger close enough to feel his warm skin. I back out a bit before somebody sees this extremely embarrassing situation and get the wrong idea .Our eyes met and I completely move away and immediately apologize.

"oh I'm sorry , I just cant help my painters instincts kicking in when I see a potential subject"-I said which he replied with a sluggish laugh.

Then 2 strangers suddenly appear out of the blue and talk to the guy . Probably those were his friends , a boy and a girl. Based on their ID they are all from the science department . I felt like the odd one out so I laid low and tried to make a silent escape but I hesitated for a moment for the girl is staring intently at me. For a moment I stared back as well , but I ignored it and leave that spot.

I stayed a bit after they were all gone , and able to read little bit on the book that guy is reading

"paper town"---didn't they made a movie of this title , maybe I will just watch it rather than reading the whole book.

On my way out of the university even from a distance I can see my parents dissatisfied frowns. This lecture session is going to be long. When I have reached them , only then that that jerk showed up.

"what commotion did you started again"- my mom begun I just looked away for I am saving my energy to at least draw a rough draft of that subject from my memory.

"look straight at me and answer the question"-she commanded.

The jerk interrupted and told them that he is the one who started it. Well that is true , but I don't need to be saved by him . And I don't really feel that he is sorry for it. For if he really want to apologize , he should have done it to me first. As expected my parents sided to him and made me the villain again. I really hate people who only acts good when someone is watching , but will transform to somebody else when there is no one to watch.

I kept silent with my earbuds plug in as I begun to sketch a rough draft of that guy from the library. When my parents notice me with my arts stuff , they usually leaves me alone so I can concentrate. So this is the perfect excuse not o get scolded , and its all thanks to that guy at the library.

I rushed to my room as soon as we got to the house. I dropped all my stuff in my bed except for the sketch book that I have been holding into and sat at my work table. I put my glasses on , turn up the volume of music a bit , and start finishing the rough sketches of his features. I made a full portrait of him with that background . I still cant perfect the details of his face but for a long distance shot , my features should be fine.

After 20 tries , I decided to call it off and get change for I am starting to smell stinky. I took off my glasses and earbuds and head to the mirror. I remove my hair tie with my right hand and unbutton my shirt with my left. I unzip my skirt and walked away to let it slide down as I remove my clothes and leave them lying on the floor. I removed my under garment after I entered the bathroom. I took a warm shower first and took a dip on a hot bath for 15 minutes and finished up with a very cold shower. Which felt like being struck with a thousand needles. I walk to my room still dripping and stark-naked. I walk to my wardrobe t to wear an underwear and a sleeping gown I wrapped my hair with a towel to dry it and head to my computer to visit that website again.

My frustration for losing 3 consecutive matches to that guy still in me. So tried to hunt for to have a revenge match , but it seems that he doesn't show up that often. I scrolled down at the match making panel and saw a message that seems addressed to me

:the girl who lost 3 consecutive matches to the strategist ...I challenge you:

Wait...what , that guy is the legendary strategist that had created this site. So that is why I cant find him . I heard that if you dive in here for the first time , you will have a privilege to have a match with the strategist if you win he will tell you who he really is and whoever does win against him will have a pot price that had been building up for the past 2 years, which already had reached a million dollar on a certain bank. Not that I am interested in the money , I just want a match to stimulate my mind to activate my creative side. Sadly , for the past 2 years no one had ever won 3 consecutive matches. All we know that if he graduate , he will graduate with all his secrets and with the pot money and now he is a senior.

This guys seems to know something since it is a private match so I think he can be a fodder so I replied.

:I only play with someone of his caliber:- I chatted

:well...just accept the challenge...you wont regret it:-he replied and I accepted and the match begun.