That Can't Be True, Right?

“I have no friends...?” I repeated in disbelief my mother words as I pointed at myself.

“No, no, no, that's not true, right?” I denied that ridiculous statement while waving my hands wildly.

Whereas I continued to justify myself, my mother's facial expressions showed me that one question mark after another popped up in her mind.

“Don't you know Fynn and Jack? One of them is an honor student while the other is a basketball freak!”

“Fynn? Jack? Never heard of them.” mom admitted as she was still in thoughts.

“What about Anna?! Surely I must have told you about her! She's my girlfriend!”

My desperation grew more as my mother showed no reactions aside from doubt.

“G-girlfriend?!” she raised her voice in surprise as her eyes got bigger.

Finally, my mother reacted differently. But it was not the reaction I sought.

“H-hey, mom... This is just a bad joke, right? Please stop playing with me... After all, I have no memories, you know?” I begged her with a self-mocking smile.

I felt my body breaking out in a cold sweat.

“L-Leon, liste-”

“A-according to them, we've been friends since middle school...”

I interrupted my mother who was about to reach out her hand to me.

“M-mom, I...”

From then on, I had no idea what I was saying. I could not even tell how my mother looked at me.

Everything began to spin in my head.

The thoughts and suspicions I had after school started to resurface all at once.

I actually have no friends? There is no way! I mean, for the past few days, I was hanging out with Anna, Jack and Fynn who treated me like an old friend!

I may not be the right one to judge but the bond we four have is one we must have forged over all the years we spent together. Yes! They definitely are my friends!

But would mom lie to me? From what I saw, she was always worrying and caring about me. She treated me kindly and gently. Spouting such a lie did not fit her image!

In the end, both sides contradict each other which did not help me at all...

One side must be lying but it would be unthinkable for both...

Dammit! I don't get it! I don't get it!

The only one who had the answer was me- the me with his memories intact.

I hate it! I hate having no memories! I hate feeling so helpless because of that!

I feel helpless and yet also so scared...

It is scary knowing nothing. Putting all your trust into people who you think are trustworthy but could be in truth sly and deceiving you...

This thought alone destroys me...

In my current state, should I even trust those around me? Was their kindness to me genuine or fake? Were the people I knew being themselves or acting? Were my friends my friends? Was black black and white white?

The more I questioned things the more did my head spin. I felt like I was not far away from going crazy if this continued.

I snapped back to reality when I noticed that my body was wrapped in warmth.

“I'm sorry, Leon.”

The gentle words whispered to me came from my mother who hugged me tightly out of nowhere.

“Well, ...” she started speaking softly.

“I guess I forgot to reveal to you that I'm actually pretty bad at remembering things, my bad...” she stated apologetic.

“...is that so?” I said with almost no strength left in my voice and body.

I had the feeling that this was a lie. However, my mouth did not open.

“Yes...”

Then, she freed herself from me while still holding my shoulders with her hands.

“You look tired. How about going to your room and resting there?” she suggested with a smile which did not reach her eyes.

Completely drained, I only gave a small nod before going to my room.

After I entered my room, I let myself fall onto my bed like a chopped off tree.

My room was empty. Besides the essential furniture and things, there was absolutely nothing. It could even get mistaken as a guest room.

People say that one's room tells a lot about the person. So does it mean that I'm empty?

“Ugh...” I groaned silently in pain.

My head stings...

No wonder. It was not really pleasant to think about all the things from a while ago.

Usually I would be left alone with my thoughts due to the emptiness in my room but today I thought that I could fall asleep in just a mere seconds. I just don't want to use my head anymore for today...

Just like that, I felt my consciousness slowly but surely leaving me.

“You make me sick. To be honest, I could vomit on you right now but this wouldn't be enough.”

“Go ahead and play king all you want for now. Just remember my words: I'll make you pay for every single little shit you did!”

“Thanks, uncle. You're a great help.”

“Now my-”

Ring!

“!”

“Haa... haa... ha...” I gasped for air while wiping my sweat with my forearm.

What was that that...?

My breathing was inconsistent and I felt my whole body burning.

I turned off my alarm clock which ended my dreams.

“Dreams?”

Everything was pitch black. The only thing I still remember was that I heard myself speaking. The tone may be more sinister and furious but I was sure that it was my voice.

Payback? Uncle?

On whom did I sought revenge and with what did my uncle help me? What kind of person was I?

But were they really dreams? It felt so real...

“No way...!”

Reflexively, my body jumped out of the bed.

I grasped my head with both hands.

Did I get a glimpse on my memories?!

“Haha... hahaha!” I laughed loudly.

I sounded happy and yet if my neighbors or family saw me they would definitely think that I am some kind of maniac. However, I could not care less at that moment. I finally got a clue on my old self even though the content was questionable.

Bzz!

When I danced around in my room, someone was calling me on my phone.

“Hello?”

[Gosh, how could sound so carefree after ignoring our messages?]

It was Anna. Today, she seemed rather mad...

Wait. Messages?

“Oh, sorry. I had no chance yet to read them. I just woke up, hehe...” I said hoping that she would understand.

[What?! You ju-]

[Hey, give me your phone!]

“Fynn?” I was surprised to hear his voice.

[That's right. Leaving the call to Anna would lead to nothing so I'll keep it short.] he mocked Anna like it was nothing.

[We're currently on our way to the mall. Do you want to join us? Jack is also here.]

“...”

I hesitated for a moment due to all the things my brain had to process.

My thoughts of yesterday still did not leave me be and then there would be the 'dream' from today.

[Leon?] Fynn called me out worriedly.

“Ah, yes?”

I guess, I made him wait.

[You coming or not? It's a nice day today, you know? And it would be more fun if you are with us!] he tried to convince me with one argument after another.

I heaved a sigh.

“I'll be there in an hour.” I replied defeated with a small smirk.

I still want to trust my friends whom I held so dearly.

But sitting at home pondering about my problems would lead to nothing. I had to take action.

 Hopefully, my mind will be cleared up after hanging out with them.