The first time that Natsumi was called Selfish

Moriyama Natsumi, the child prodigy, the runaway.

A girl born to the family of two extremely famous and extremely successful actors, a girl who has it all since birth is now walking with her face down as she headed to the library. Although she doesn’t know if acting was for her or not, it was still the only thing that she had and it was not like she ever hated it. To her, acting was the same as helping others. Others requested for her, she’s there to assist and help them achieve what they want to achieve. That’s what acting was to her…

But running away from home with the intention of being herself rejuvenated her acting spirit again.

She wanted to dye the world in her passion.

That was all. And now that she has the chance, she was going to prove herself if that’s what she really wanted to do…but still –

She can’t sing.

No, in fact, she could possibly be classified under Congenital Amusia or as commonly known as tone deaf. The number of times that she was scouted after hearing her soothing normal voice only to be asked to lip sync a song and has someone else with a similar voice sing the song instead has turned from a surprising event to a full-blown fact was not a joke. Different directors will have to tell each other that she cannot sing and many jobs offered have been restricted because of that.

With a heavy shoulder, Natsumi walked towards the library and that was when she heard a –

BANG!!!

coming from the upstairs.

Having the free time, she decided to check out what happened. While a little scared that it was a gun, she thought to herself that no one would do that in such a countryside like this. While one thought said that it’s none of her business, the other thought replied back with “you should definitely check it out!”. A little bit like when someone got both an angel and a devil arguing in their head…but this one… just an overly dramatic two conflicting thoughts of a teenager going through adolescence. She decided to check it out…

Well…you will have to pretend that she’s worried rather than nosy…

“Are you alright?” Natsumi rushed upstairs and slid the door open and asked instantly without checking if she even got the right room or if she shouldn’t be there. But it wasn’t like something that was rather inappropriate was happening, in fact… it felt a little anti-climactic.

When Natsumi opened that door, she saw a black-haired boy looking at her face while blowing three different coloured balloons all at once. He was sitting on a half-broken chair that can twist although there was a piano and a piano stool.

“Yeah, I am good. Do you mind closing the door?” One of the small balloons deflated blowing his hair up and it flew across the floor in front of Natsumi.

“Oh, yeah…sorry.” She quietly closed the door behind her. “I just heard a really loud bang... I thought someone got shot.”

“Ah, that was me. Not the getting shot part. Just balloon. It popped in front of my face.”

“Balloon…wait, why a balloon?”

“I am just trying to re-create a sound effect in P.D.Q. Bach Overture.” He was holding the balloon tightly to not let any air escape. The balloons were bouncing off each other in his palms.

“Back who?” Again, it seemed that her mind and thoughts are leaking.

“A composer…if you don’t have any more questions…can you leave me alo –“

He didn’t have the chance to finish his sentence. Natsumi swooped at the chance the moment it was presented.

“Did you just say a composer?! So you can sing?”

“I never said that, but I guess I can sing…a bit…I never took any lesson though.”

“Really?! That’s so awesome! Can you teach me how to sing?! Or even play the guitar?!”

“Look. You really barged in here, interrupted my practice and now you are going to ask me to teach you? I am not a teacher. Go ask someone else…now can you lea –“ By now, all the balloons have all been deflated and have flown all over the floor.

“My name is Moriyama Natsumi and I am in the first year.” Natsumi cast her eyes downwards as she muttered over her words. “I want to participate in the school play this year…like really really want to… but I can’t sing.” Her cheeks…a little red.

“And why should I do it…what am I going to get out of it? All you have done now is wasted my time with your selfish wish. You think I care about that?”

“I – I…” It was the first time she got insulted to her face, selfish too. She has always thought that acting was for other people, that she was doing it because others wanted her, because they needed her. Before, all she has ever received were praises even if it were lips service. And yet, a boy that she has never met before is calling her selfish. “I – I…” She was holding back her tears but it seemed like she couldn’t stop her voice from breaking.

“If you have nothing to say, please get out. You are wasting my time.” He said in a louder voice, a little more aggressively. Natsumi took three-steps backs and her back hit the door.

“I – I want to act for other people.” She shuffled in her place. “I – I want to show everyone tha –“ Her voice was shaking, her body was shaking and her tears already leaked out a little even though she tried her best to hold them in.

“All I am hearing is ‘I want this, I want that’, at the end, you are just a self –”

“Yeah, I am a selfish girl! I want to act! I want to try many things, acting gives you the chance to be anything, O-I want to act and find my true self!” She didn’t even know what she was looking at, at him? No, her eyes were so blurry from all the tears and she started shouting, her mouth, about to rip and her voice box begging her to stop.

“ I want to be myself and not someone else! I want to –“

“Yeah, you are selfish alright.”

Haruki stood up from his chair and the chair squeaked a little. “I am Kamishiro Haruki, first-year. Looking forward to working with you.” He extended his hand to her.

“Really…? W-wwait are you just trying to hold my hand?!” Natsumi took a step back

“Is this what all city girls are like?”

“You can tell?”

“Super easy with the way you speak and walk and everything…it just seems so tensed.”

“So…when can we start? Now?”

“Hold your horse, you have wasted all of my free, I couldn’t even try to replicate a canon sound in Tchaikovsky’s overture.”

“Chai tea what? Never mind…did I just befriend another nerd.”

“Who said that we are friends. Student-mentor, that’s what we are.”

“Are you embarrassed to have such a cute girl like me as a friend?”

“You are really calling yourself cute…you aren’t even my type.” Haruki’s face reddened a little too honestly, but he shook his head disappointedly not sure if it was at himself or at her.

And that was the first time that a boy just said that she wasn’t cute nor his type.

Too many first today…hasn’t it?