I am a nobody.

Since the training room could not be huge, as it originally was intended for auxiliary storage, there was no good way of replicating throwing javelins at people far away. Except marking a bull’s eye and making consistent hits to it the accepted level of skill for using throwables. In the three days we have partied more, but trained far more than that. The last session was in the space suits, outside. My task was to hit Hiro as many times as I could with two quivers of javelins, which held a dozen each. Of course, we tried that a few times. Finding the training ammunition was easier thanks to blue cloths at the back end of each and every one. But still annoying, as I could throw javelins for over a hundred metres. Hans and Yuki duelled. I could see that Hans’s right leg wasn’t as mobile. That was because it too, was a prosthesis. Because of that, his suit was specially made not to wrap around that leg fully. It had latches that allowed that. Essentially he used his impairment to reduce the amount of vulnerable parts of the suit. However, making the process of putting it on even longer.

The silence did not fool me. I saw clearly, that Hans and Yuki were doing their very best. I thought to myself that they could get muscle cramps the next day, as I did after the first training session. But then I remembered, they had trained many times before, and they knew what they were doing. Hiro jumped high and low, dashed around, and charged at me, all to simulate a real battle. She held a metal stick, the size of the common, two-handed spear. It was so that I had to throw the javelins strongly enough so that they were so fast, that she couldn’t parry them. Alone, a feat not difficult. But combined with her evading skills, it was extremely challenging. My record that day was four hits. And all of those were during her charging at me. Even if the most likely, it was also the easiest type of movement. She still managed to parry two.

As we returned inside, Hiro congratulated me. That was good enough for a novice. Except that unlike her, I would need to travel with two quivers of javelins. She said that her record was ten out of twenty four, with Kevin being the one dodging. Vice versa, Kevin had reached twelve recently. Hans also trained his accuracy with Hiro evading. His record was nine. He would bring one quiver of javelins, and a spear on his travels. Being the only one of us three who would be able to fight both at a distance, and in melee. Not accounting for me being technically able to use a javelin without throwing it, up close.

Then Hiro explained to me why she threw her javelins to Kevin when we fought against the Crimson Vanguards in front of my dome. Apparently, the formation is such that the helm of the party has to have javelins, in case they are the ones who see the opponent first, and can get a clear shot. In case they are being charged at, the role of a ranged fighter falls on the person in the back. This tactic wasn’t too common, but they have fought opponents who had done the same. This time there would be no weapon swapping, so I had to go last, while Hans would be walking first. That made it simpler for me, as it would be difficult to lead the way as I had not really paid much attention the last time I went to my dome with Hiro and Kevin. I made myself a mental note to remember landmarks this time. Even though I would be able to do that only well into the trip, as it would be too dark before that.

I asked Hans and Yuki why their suits had blue drawings on them, and then Hiro had to state that they used paintless suits because of a job they were doing when I stumbled upon them. They said that usually marks are used, but also it is in a form of a drawing, because in that way it is harder to copy them and, most importantly, you can actually differentiate between your team members. Hans's mark was a horned, weird skull, Yuki's was a simple flower, which I, of course, did not recognize. Yuki said that Vanguards had worn other colours than red to make surprise attacks before, but those occasions were very rare, as every Vanguard squad that walks around with different colours risks getting attacked by their own. There is no simple way of communicating, so in the case of friendly fire, the side that is being attacked is supposed to surrender and propose to talk through touching suits, with signs. And no peaceful settlements use red, because they would risk getting attacked by their allies. Although as in the case with Hiro, Kevin, and me now, paintless suits are used to blend in better, but are downright horrible if you have a big squad, as there would be no way of differentiating between people. In other words, you wouldn’t know who to give the javelins to. Of course, in the heat of battle people can mistake one symbol for another, since they have to be of the same colour, but that is still much better, than the alternative. Other colours represent different ally groups, but really, the only ones to worry about were the red ones. For the time being my suit wouldn’t have any paint. Although I was promised a personalized drawing, once I became one of them.

I packed some food and water with me. As did the others. We also took big bags with us, which had containers for water. I dreaded the fact that the three of us would have to carry that much over a long trip to Nurin from the dome I woke up in. Naturally, we would rest up there besides collecting the water. Yuki showed me my revolver. Hans succeeded in persuading Gareth to give it to him for this trip, but Yuki had to be the one to bear it normally. We agreed, that if there were three or more Crimson Vanguards, Yuki would pull the gun out, and give it to me, as fast as she could. Since I am known to be accurate. A bit later, we exchanged the last pieces of conversation for a many hours. Suit to suit conversation was for emergencies only after all. Moreover, specific ones at that. The exit chamber depressurized and we set out. At night, as always. I did remember to have my eyes peeled, but at this point we were navigating by the stars and direction sense alone. Hans and Yuki were faster, than Kevin and Hiro. I assumed it was because they knew how good my stamina was, unlike the others before. Or maybe Kevin and Hiro we slow out of caution towards me. Either way, even I had no concrete idea of whether I had the endurance for such a pace. In the end… Yes, I had.

***

As we neared the dome, Hans gave out signs that meant that we couldn’t relax, that the enemy could be inside. Unlike when we were entering Compor, we did not knock on the doors. We started depressurization immediately. I was told by Hiro at one of the parties, when I asked about it, that the rhythmical knocking is done to avoid the chances of there being someone inside, who doesn’t have their suit ready. In that case they would have the time to react and block depressurization, by opening the second doors. All tensed up we entered. We started up the pressurization. I had been warned beforehand, javelins were practically useless indoors. If you fought inside, it would be in close quarters, after all. Yuki pulled out my revolver, and handed it to me, as we couldn’t know for sure whether there was anyone inside. We had left the place in hibernation mode, which was still on, so we waited for it to warm up the air before pressurizing the room. That took long, and the waiting was nerve-racking. As even then, there could theoretically be an ambush inside, we weren’t about to find out unprepared. We didn’t take our sack helmets off, except me, as we had agreed beforehand. Because I would be the one in the back anyway, so a vulnerability didn’t change much for me. The ability to hear, however, could be crucial as we opened the doors. Hans pressed the button, and I raised the muzzle before me.

There was no ambush. We made sure of that.

‘What was that bag outside, Indra?’ eventually asked Kevin.

The thing hopelessly stood out. I could not see any benefit in lying. Even if I could lose these friends by saying the truth, lying to them would bear the same risk, but arguably greater. And either way I would be scared.

‘It’s corpses. I don’t know if you were told, but I woke up among fresh corpses with bullet wounds. With a revolver in my hand. One was fresh enough to say my name among curses as he saw me. That was how I learned it. All evidence points to me being a mass murderer.’

‘How many?’ Yuki uttered.

‘What?’

‘How many are in the bag. And how many do you think you have killed in the past.’ Yuki sounded unusually stern.

‘Three there, and as Kevin supposed, probably dozens before those. The revolver has barely any bullets left after all. Two to be precise. And if I had gotten my hands on any, there probably was a lot.’ I felt pathetic saying this.

‘Dozens is a modest estimate, if, as Hiro said, you didn’t miss.’ Coldly said Yuki.

‘I think I had missed once, while fighting in here. Judging only by a mark on a wall.’

‘Well, in your case that’s good… You know, we aren’t much better. We have killed many people too. Five between us two. That is enough to make me shiver when I think about it. So I can only imagine how scary the acknowledgement of that is for you. Anyway. I would recommend not to brood over it. Won’t help. I tried. She too.’ Hans reassured me.

‘Hans is right. Don’t let it get to you. If you can. As inhuman as it might seem, that is the only way out.’ Yuki’s expression softened. Now I couldn’t be sure whether her coldness was towards me, or her own demons.

The first thing we did after making sure that we were safe was eating, getting out of the suits and taking showers, which I now noticed to have much more water than in Compor, of course, this tiny place had a water extractor after all. I was the last to take one, and right after I got a strange thought.

‘Isn’t it strange that this outpost is so small?’ I asked. Of course, this was a rhetorical question.

‘If it’s just for water, why not?’ answered Hans.

‘Because in that case, any water extracted would need to be delivered to the settlements that actually needed it. And as we soon will experience that is not an easy task.’

‘And?’ said Yuki.

‘Wouldn’t it make much more sense if this place had a pipe, or pipes, connecting to the big settlements around?’

‘No.’

‘I mean, in the mess of buttons and information here, we could have missed it… so-’

‘I don’t know if you’re thinking that only because you have no wish of hauling two thirds of your bodyweight, or more, of water, but that is most certainly not a thing. Come on, a pipe? Spanning kilometres? On mars?’ Yuki had a point.

‘Maybe, a thin tube then?’

‘In theory – maybe, in reality – the folks in the closest settlements would have known that and would have found this place long ago. As such important information wouldn’t be just lost.’ To this, I had no counter argument. Maybe I did think that, because I remembered how hard it was to drag a corpse to Compor. The distance to Nurin was very similar.

‘Heh. You win. I acknowledge my lack of thought.’ I jokingly bowed to Yuki.

‘As for your original argument, the water was probably transported by a truck.’ Yuki surprised me. I had completely forgotten the discrepancy that led me to think about the possibility of an intercolonial water pipe. Which she effortlessly explained, while I had overlooked the fact that cars, aren’t just a fantastical beast, present only in videogames. My respect for her grew.

We took naps, two at a time, to be alert at all times, and to be immune to the chance of oversleeping the optimal period of starting our trip to Nurin, however small it was. Since the naps were forced, and during an awkward time in our circadian rhythms, they weren’t all that helpful. But even a light rest was appreciated. The one of us who was awake also had to fill dozens of containers that we brought. When I did it, I felt a wave of annoyance, as, of course, there were no truly big ones. In other words, all of us, would have to find a way to comfortably walk with several smaller burdens, instead of simply dragging one. In the very beginning of the evening, we figured that out to the best of our ability, and set out.

It was as horrible as I imagined it, and yet I couldn’t be sure whether it was worse than the corpse. I thought to ask Hans and Yuki for their opinion, but during the travel, that would be difficult and uncalled for. After many, exhausting hours, we trudged up another crater, and inside, lo and behold, a huge settlement – Nurin. The way down was easier, although it was bittersweet. As even if it is easier to descend than to do the opposite, we also had to be careful not to drop the merchandise, or to topple with it. A challenge I almost failed.

It didn’t take long for me to realize. Nurin was at least an order of magnitude bigger than Compor. It made sense that they would need water more, but I could only guess, why settlements so similar, could have such a glaring difference in scale. The reason was probably historical. One was younger than the other. Although, that did not mean I could figure out which one that easily.#

Hans banged on the door with the blunt side of his weapon. In the same rhythm as Hiro did. We entered, and quickly started the pressurization procedure. Yuki and Hans laid down their weapons, and I did the same. Although, as I now realized, Yuki forgot to ask for the gun back, during our stay at the water dome. I had no idea what to do with the revolver, as I supposed we would be searched, but leaving an item as rare as it on the floor in the open didn’t seem like a good idea. At the same time I wasn’t ready smuggle a firearm inside a friendly colony. Thankfully, I had enough time to ask her, before the door opened. Right after she took off her sack-helmet. She looked at the holster I held in my hands and frowned. Yuki took it and put it inside her bag. In the end we still would be taking the weapon with us. She at least had more experience with such things than me. I still decided to double check.

‘You sure we can bring that?’

‘No. It’s my first time here. But we’ll take out chances. Even if they search us and find it, we’ll say outright why we have it. It should work.’ Hans laughed as Yuki said that. While I pressed my hand into my forehead, and thought whether there was a good enough reason for me to protest. I couldn’t find it. A firearm is an extraordinary treasure after all. The doors opened, and I saw a guy holding a handgun aiming at us, and another guy with a crossbow beside him. He too, held us in his sights, and yet that was insignificant. Understandably, I got scared.

‘Who are you?’

‘We are from Compor. We came here to sell water. See these?’ said Hans as he pointed at the containers. It seemed that he wasn’t intimidated at all.

‘Russel, go bring Compor’s emissary.’ Said the first guy to the one bearing a crossbow.

‘How was the way?’

‘Delightfully unremarkable.’ answered Hans.

‘Good.’

An awkward pause later, another person came rushing in, with the crossbowman.

‘Ah! Hans, and- Who is that? I recognize Yuki, and can attest to their trustworthiness, at least to my knowledge. But that gentleman…’

‘He is on his trial to prove himself to be one of us. It’s fine, he doesn’t need to go any further, but do call someone to carry his water containers.’ quickly replied Hans.

‘As per usual conduct, he will have to stay in here then.’ Said the envoy. For now I was a nobody, and had no right to go deeper into the settlement. That was a surprise, and yet I could have predicted it.

‘Fine by me. I guess.’ I decided not to stay silent. It was then that I noticed that this room was fitted with many metal plates, making it safe to shoot. The doors too.

The initial scare quickly ended, when without any questions, they just gave me a chair, and Yuki and Hans disappeared into the depths of this place with the goods. Until it hit me. We would have to spend the day here, since even if the deal is done quickly, it would be bad to travel at this hour, or any time soon. I could not last ten hours on a chair.