We aren't so different after all

“I just don’t get it.. How did SHE score first in the entire school? She’s a new transfer. Is that even possible?” I walked briskly, grinding my fingernails into the strap of my backpack, almost inaudibly cursing her under my breath as Sen and I headed off towards first period.

“Don’t look at me. I told you that girl was trouble. But nobody wants to listen to oooollllld Sentaro!” He jutted his thumb at himself as if there were someone else he could be talking about. I really just wanted him to be quiet just this ONE time so I could calm myself down. As we paced down the hall eventually reaching our class, I turned in with my head down the whole time, shuffling my feet to the back and taking a seat. I stared at my own hands as I picked at my fingers anxiously, glancing up to notice the girl in front of me. At first, nothing in particular stuck out about her, but I could just barely make a spiked leather choker poking out above her blazer.

“This is a joke. This has got to be a joke right? No, I’m being punished for something. Is that what this is?” I whispered to myself and glanced out the window up into the sky, asking whatever Gods might be listening why they had to be so twisted. I tried to occupy my mind and ignore her, pulling out my erasers and lead pencils out of my bag to get ready for class. The small plastic click of me setting my pencil down on the desk was enough to stir her into turning around.

“Oh, it's you again. Listen, as long as you don’t have any hard feelings about the exam scores, I won’t have any hard feelings about you almost making me wreck my board this morning, fair?” She’d spun around half way with her forearms resting on the back of her chair, leaning forward just far enough I could glance at her cleavage.

“Ah…yeah, sure thing I guess…” I mumbled, making a conscious effort not to stare too obviously as she propped her elbows on the chair and placed both her hands under her chin, squishing her chest together a little bit tighter.

“Hey, thanks. Maybe you aren’t such a bad dude after all. And if you need a tutor or anything…You know, for next exams. I could help you out, just ask kay?” She closed her eyes, tilted her head a little and beamed at me with a little smile before turning back around. I hadn’t noticed , but at some point I’d grabbed one of my pencils and started bending it so forcefully it snapped and crumbled audibly into pieces on the desk.

Morning classes that day seemed to drag on for an eternity, I don’t think I retained a single piece of knowledge from any of them. I was too fuming to listen to any of the teachers at all, trying to figure out how to explain to my dad that for the first time in my highschool career I had been knocked from first place. By a new transfer, no less. Eventually though, the morning did pass, and with its passing came the lunch bell. As usual I grabbed my bento box and pushed a desk over to sit right next to Sen, who was sitting looking hum-drum because he only had a rice ball for lunch.

“I just don't get it. I work harder for this than anyone. How does she pull off getting top score?” I sat there prodding the tuna onigiri and miso soup my mother had packed for me with my chopsticks.

“Are you gonna eat that?” Sen was staring at my lunch, his belly abruptly grumbling.

“Knock yourself out.” I said, sliding it over to him. “But are you even listening to me, I mean it's just not fair!” He had already begun slurping down the miso soup, taking big bites out of the onigiri and wiping bits of rice away with his sleeve.

“I just don’t know what you want me to say. The test is over, you can’t do anything about it now. And you got second out of how many students in this class? I wish I could do that good.” He continued to slurp and munch as he spoke, reaching across the tables to grab my milk carton and down it in one gulp.

“I guess so. I’m just not used to it, ya know? I’ve always been the best. There hasn’t really been any competition for me…until now.” I looked around the classroom, all of the students had huddled their desks together into their respective friend groups. Everyone except for Aiko. I watched her as she went from group to group, saying a few words, everyone would shake their heads no and she would move on. She did this to every group in the class until finally…Sen and I were the only group left to approach.

“Mind if I sit?” Whatever strong indestructible confidence had been in her voice earlier had been reduce to a humble chirp. She hung her head a bit low and glanced off to the side, unable to look at us. “You know what, dumb question…I’m sorry.” She began to walk away to go sit alone, but to my surprise Sentaro grabbed her hand and pulled her back.

“The more the merrier I always say, besides… I might be a bit of a jock but I know what it's like to have to sit alone.” This time I was the one whispering under my breath ‘what the hell are you doing?’ but before I could protest further, Aiko had already pulled over a desk and chair. We all sat quietly for some time, the only sounds being the laughter and chatter from the rest of our classmates and Sen chewing his food like he hadn’t eaten in days. Aiko was the first one to break the silence.

“Hey, about before… I’m sorry. I’ve changed schools so many times over the years that I usually just act cold to everyone… It’s a lot easier to move on when nobody likes you from the start.” she mumbled rather quietly.

“Well that's no way to live…” Sen stopped to slurp up some more miso. “I mean I’m sure transferring to a new school is hard but that’s no reason to not make friends, right Ren?” I’d been quiet so far during his conversation, and although I was curious myself I had wanted to keep it that way.

“Mhmm” I nodded to Aiko. Our eyes met and we both looked away.

“I don’t think I really explained well enough… This isn’t my first time transferring schools…it's actually my ninth'' Aiko turned her face away again and glanced out the window. The dull sky from earlier had turned a pale blue befitting of winter.

“N…nine?” Both Sen and I blurted out , glancing at each other then back to Aiko.

“How does one kid even get accepted by that many schools in Japan let alone transferred that fast? I’ve never heard of anything like that before.” I leaned in with my elbows on the desk, my curiosity getting the best of me.

“ Well you see… I’m only half Japanese… My dad is an American and works on a lot of the bases all over Japan. I went to four different schools in Okinawa alone…That was back in grade school. By the time I was in high school we’d come to the mainland but we still moved around all the time.”

“I knew she looked a little funny Ren, she’s an American! It all makes sense now. That's the only reason they’d let you get away with your hair, makeup and clothes being that way…” Sen smiled, thinking he had it all figured out, sitting tall and proud with specks of rice at the corners of his mouth.

“Uhh…Sen, I don’t wanna burst your bubble or anything. But you’re Japanese and they let you dress and look the way you do, too.” I watched as his face dropped and became coated in confusion.

“Well…yeah, but…I just get a pass because the teachers know if they say anything I could probably take them in a fight.” This answer elicited a small giggle from Aiko. It was the first time in my life I’d heard her laugh. It was adorable.

“Well if that's the case why don’t I get a pass too, I’m the only one in school who can kick your ass.” Aiko looked back and forth between the two of us. Sen easily had 40 pounds on me and was built like a brick house, whereas I looked like…well…someone who was studying to be a lawyer someday.

“Really? Have you two fought before or something?” Aiko seemed to relax a bit finally, reaching into her lunchbox to open her milk carton.

“Have we fought before? Have we fought before?! That's the only reason we're friends to begin with!” Sen slapped his hand on my back in a friendly gesture, but was a bit too rough and it stung quite a bit.

“Really, how does that work? People become friends from fighting?” Aiko stuck a long red and white striped straw down in her milk and took a long sip, pursing her cute black lips around it as she looked at me for answers.

“Yeah, the first year of highschool Sentaro was a big bully… he’d smack everyone in class around so he could get extra money for snacks. He finally got down to just me, and when I told him no he said He was gonna break my nose.”

“But…you somehow won, Ren? No offense but Sentaro seems a bit…bigger and stronger.” Aiko let the straw fall from her lips, black lipstick stains coating the tip of it.

“Well that's true…but what Sentaro didn’t know is that my dad has had me enrolled in Taekwondo and Jiu Jitsu classes since I was four. Long story short I got to keep my money and Sen got a broken elbow.” I laughed and squeezed the loose skin under his elbow before he had time to pull away.

“Ha ha…very funny. Anyways, the next day I followed Ren around and asked if he could show me some moves. I always loved martial arts as a kid but my Mom could never afford to send me to classes. The closest thing I ever got was the wrestling team. It turns out we actually had a lot more in common… Music, video games…movies. From there we just ended up hanging out and sparring everyday and we’ve been best friends ever since.”

“Guys have it so lucky… all you have to do is beat each other to bits and all of the sudden you’re friends for life.” Aiko cutely crossed her arms and pouted, blowing puddles into her milk. For a moment, I actually felt better about everything, but in his usual manner Sen jarred me back to reality.

“So how are you gonna deal with your pops? He’s gonna be pretty pissed when you get home and tell him you aren’t first in the class anymore.” I glared at him, anxiously grinding my knuckles against my thigh as I tried not to break down in the middle of class. I saw Aiko staring at me with a strange look on her face, she stopped blowing bubbles and looked back and forth between the both of us, seeming genuinely surprised.

“You’re joking right? Your dad is gonna be pissed because you got second out of your entire grade?” Her voice seemed a bit higher than before, as if she’d become genuinely concerned for my well being.

“My dad is…” I never had to explain what I thought about my father to anyone besides Sentaro before, and even he found out by himself when I invited him over one day and he kicked him out for being ‘a no good delinquent.’ Truth be told, I owe my father a lot. For as cold and rude a man as he could be, if it wasn’t for him I wouldn’t be nearly as intelligent as I am or have half the skills I do. I wouldn’t have a bright and prosperous future all planned out for me…so why did I want to tell her that I resent him? That he never allowed me to be…well…me?

“My dad is…really set in his ways. If you're not first, you’re last. There are no rewards for second place. Your best doesn’t mean shit unless it's better than everyone else.” I gazed off out the window as I spoke, watching a few doves out on a distant power line nudge against each other. It had started to drizzle again, the faint pitter patter of tiny water droplets cascading down against the windows began to echo against the walls of our small little classroom.

“Don’t let Ren fool you, there’s no other way to say it. Guys a total jerk, all he does is walk around acting all high and mighty while putting everyone else down.” Sen had a deep grit to his voice as he spoke, on more than one occasion my father had reminded him he wasn’t the type of person anyone should be friends with, like he was a lesser being or something.

“Hey, in a way you’re lucky. I mean, I guess it seems cold and all, but that’s his way of showing he cares. I don’t really have that with my dad, he’s so busy doing work for the American military all the time that sometimes I don’t even see him for days at a time.” Aiko propped her head up with her palm and wore a somber little grin that was obviously just a mask to cover up a deep stinging pain. Who would have thought that in the end, the three of us weren’t so different after all.

“ I mean, your dad must care too, right? He makes sure you get into all these good schools and has traveled all over the country with you. Dad’s can just be like that sometimes, at least you have your mom with you , too.” I chimed back, trying to lighten the mood a little.

“Actually My Dad divorced my mom when I was four…She was tired of being dragged around with him everywhere, being dumped in new apartments every few months so he could focus on his work. She writes me a letter one a year on my birthday usually…I think she’s living in Sasebo.” The cold detached tone that Aiko had in her voice from earlier that morning had returned, and our little groom seemed to have a cloud of gloom resting above all of our heads. We spent the rest of lunch eating in relative silence, the dark cloud not lifting for the rest of the school day.

“You sure you don’t want me to come with you? Or maybe you wanna come over my place until your pops cools down a bit?” Sen walked beside me as the bell for last period rang and all of the students rushed out into the hallway, loudly chatting and bumping shoulders as they filtered through the thin corridors of the school.

“Nah, if I don’t go straight home my dad will just call and ask about them and it’ll be like getting scolded for it twice. And as much as my dad would love to have you over for dinner…I think I better go alone this time.” I pushed open the large blue metals doors at the back of the school, exiting from there instead of the front so I could avoid the crowd. Sen came up, raised his fist to bump with me and smiled.

“Alright man, you know best. Just remember I’m one call away if you need to talk or come over.” I raised my own fist, unable to contain a small smirk as we bumped knuckles and parted ways. The rain had seriously picked up again, a frigid miserable downpour that seemed to trickle right through my jacket and into my bones. I opened my Umbrella and stepped out into the storm, starting my slow stroll to the train station.

“Hey, hey ren…wait up!” I heard Aiko’s voice call out from behind me, I turned to see her running towards me with her skateboard tucked under her arm. She got under my umbrella with me, intertwining her free arm with mine as we both continued to walk. I blushed, the abrupt affection taking me off guard. Surely she didn’t think this was normal, right? If anybody saw us like this they’d surely think we’re a couple…but for some reason I didn’t mind.

“Uh, what's up? Don’t you have to be getting home too, Ai-chan?” I looked over to her, she had tucked herself in close to me and was shivering. I stopped and slid off my jacket, handing it to her as we stood under the umbrella together, the only sound around was the constant little thumps of rain droplets rolling the umbrella above us. She slid herself into my coat without hesitation, it was comically big on her and she quickly rubbed her hands up and down on the sleeves to get some friction warmth going. She exhaled, her white breath lingering a moment before dissipating out into the storm.

“Yeah about that, I’m not actually going home right now.” I really wasn’t sure what to say. We continued to walk slowly with our arms intertwined, I could feel my cheeks heating up and turning red. Don’t be an idiot, Ren. A cute girl is holding onto you right now and all you have to do is just not say something stupid.

“Is there any reason you’re um…holding onto me? Why aren’t you going home?” Damn it. That is NOT how you let her know you like it. Moron, Moron, Moron!!! I wasn’t sure what to expect after completely blowing it, but what came out of her mouth next was probably the least likely option of all.