Chapter 13:

No time to explain, come along

Fantaschiel!! The Legendary Rom-Com without Romance or Comedy in it

And so, the entire clan of Hen went extinct. Nobody particularly minded though. Clans are one of those things that sound super cool in theory, but once you get to experience them for yourself, you kinda wish you never did.

Especially the neighbors didn’t mind- listening to the loud clunks of weapons coming from next door from dusk till dawn is quite the nuisance. Think you can file a noise complaint against an ancient clan? Technically, you can. You really shouldn’t though.

On the way back to their newly purchased luxurious villa, the Fantaschiel duo got stopped by a group of armed men. In fact, an entire battalion.

Now, killing a battalion of soldiers wouldn’t be any trouble for the overpowered friend-couple, but killing anyone in broad daylight is frowned upon, regardless of whether the world is placed in a fictional setting or not.

Apparently Elmax is sending his regards- and by regards, we mean a group of bloodthirsty mercenaries to kindly remind Fantastasia and Dezechiel they should, in fact, be rescuing Lysterinn from Buddhapest.

And so, with heavy hearts and a crippling cigar smoking addiction (this won’t be explained later), they take their leave from the wondrous holiday resort of dreams.


Buddhapest is the polar opposite of Okichiwawa- a city filled with mist and shadows, a place on earth almost as gloomy as Brighton, London.

The town used to be bustling with life in the past- so what happened? Well, as the name suggests, there used to be a large statue of Buddha situated in the city center. However, for whatever reason, one day, the statue just got up and left.

Thought towns worship gods just for fun? Think again. Without the blessings of a local deity, one plague after another found its way into the lives of the residents- death, war, famine, and the worst of all, an Amy Schumer stand-up.

Soon, the population dwindled down to a shocking number of four- and two of those turned out to be fake IDs traced back to a certain man by the name of Taxel Fraudman.

And this is the type of city Buddhapest is- the city Where Light Doesn’t Shine and God Dares not Enter.


Fantastasia regrets a single thing. A few weeks back, she was in one of those stores that have a bunch of useless things that look cool, but you won’t ever wind up using. She saw a head lamp, but after a snarky remark from the angel, she decided not to purchase it.

However, this place’s alleyways are so dark and misty she could really use one right about now.

“Hey, Deze, how are we supposed to find your side piece?”

“You realize you’re the side piece, right?” he retorts.

“Heh, as if. You wish you could get a piece of this!” With a smug expression and playful elbow hit on his stomach, Fantastasia assumes she has won this exchange.

“If Lysterinn is the side piece, then who’s the main girl?”

That single remark completely wipes the grin of victory from her face. She comes to believe this argument was rigged from the start and she would have lost regardless.

While the two bicker, they fail to notice the clicky sound getting closer and closer to them. This time, it isn’t your average crackhead rattling his teeth- Buddhapest is basically vacant, after all.

When they turn the corner, they are greeted by a never ending crowd of puppets, all holding various kinds of weapons.

“Eeeh, I thought we were past the point in the story where we clear out vast amounts of low level enemies!” Fan-Fan doesn’t seem one bit as enthusiastic as the last time this happened.
She leisurely strikes the closest one with her spear. Hmm, it’s kind of not cutting through.

She tries pulling her weapon back out of the wooden soldier, but even that proves to be an arduous task.

Lederkuchen wasn’t kidding when he said they’d be dead for sure once they came to Buddhapest- home turf advantage is something to consider, especially in regards to stuff like maintaining a large amount of deadly familiars. Or football.

Panicked, the duo tries to carve out a path with brute force. However, with the handicaps of Fan-Fan not wanting to use her ice magic and Dezechiel being forbidden from angelin’, it isn’t going particularly well.

Something distracts Fantastasia for a second- she recalls how Dezechiel fell into a latrine once. Before she realizes it, one of the puppets is about to stab her with a pitchfork. Not in a lethal manner, but being stabbed with a pitchfork is not a pleasant experience regardless.

“Watch out, sweetie.”

From the evening sky, a tall, slim and mysterious gentleman descends onto the scene. Long overflowing raven hair flows down his pitch black button-up shirt like an abounding rain. Actually, calling it a ’button-up shirt’ is quite a stretch- he’s not using too many of them, after all. With a V neck so large it puts Fan-Fan to shame, he casually destroys the puppet next to her with a single swipe of his hand.

While the demon girl visibly ogles the tall man, without even breaking a sweat, he takes out a good number of wooden dolls in their vicinity.

“They didn’t hurt you, did they, my princess?” he tosses his luscious hair over the shoulder, revealing a couple of blond highlights.

“Eh? Ah? Naah, I don’t think so,” Fantastasia gets more flushed than a shopping mall restroom.

“That’s wonderful to hear.”

Dezechiel finally turns around, busy dealing with the wooden enemies up until this point. He notices the shady looking man next to him, pondering whether he poses a threat to his romantic chances. After about two nanoseconds worth of thinking time, he comes to the conclusion that he most definitely does.

“Huh? Who are you?”

The tall, slim and mysterious gentleman brushes his hair with the hand he used to decimate a puppet just a few seconds ago. “Ah, how rude of me. I apologize. My name is Sefure Netori.” He casually reaches his hand out to Deze.

The dumbfounded angel agrees to the shake. He’s still busy processing what’s going on.

“Dezechiel, please to meet you…” he gives his introduction absentmindedly.

Sefure’s eyes open wide. “Dezechiel? Did you just say Dezechiel?!” He violently shakes the surprised angel.

“Uhm, yeah, that’s me,” the brown-haired swordsman isn’t too sure what happenstance he can attribute this reception to.

“Dezechiel! You’re Lysterinn’s husband, right?”

Ah, he doesn’t think he is. Did she introduce him that way?

Actually, chances are she DID introduce him that way.

“Not really but-”

“You need to go save her!” Sefure insists. “She’s trapped in a nearby church, held captive by the villainous Lederkuchen! She needs your help, Dezechiel! You’re going to go, right?!”

Deze feels very weird about this. Sefure Netori gives the feeling of a pushy door-to-door salesman.

He also probably scores a lot with the girls, so Dezechiel subconsciously respects him.

“Ah, uh, sure,” he gives in to the pressure.

“Great,” Sefure nods, letting go of Dezechiel and smashing two puppets into the ground right after, “Fantastasia and I are going to head for the plaza where the puppet control device is!”

He forcibly takes the unassuming demon girl by the hand, then storms off into the night before she has any time to respond.

However, given her dreamy gaze, she’d most definitely agree.

Huh? Dezechiel is getting this weird feeling. Sefure Netori is a really dodgy name. Is it really ok to leave The Resident Girl’s Novel & Manga Enthusiast with him?

Waitwaitwait, did a tall, slim and mysterious gentleman just take Fan-Fan away? Isn’t that kind of skewed towards the genre that gets mistaken with the National Tournament of Rendentalia’s abbreviated name?

He wants to protest, but the odd man has long since disappeared with his lifelong crush.

Eeeeeh? Did we really have to end on this note?!?