Point of View

Our bus suddenly stopped after about half an hour on the road and I looked up at Max to see if he had any idea what was going on. We were not supposed to arrive back at the hotel for at least another 30 minutes. He calmly shrugged and looked just as confused as the rest of our classmates. At last, our PE teacher shouted over the intercom: “Okay everyone, we’re making a surprise stop to take a short hike to a viewpoint in the woods. Gives y’all some time to stretch your legs before we board the bus again! As you are aware, we will take a long, guided hike through the forest tomorrow. Hopefully, this will give you a little taste of what is to come."

I do not think anyone on the bus was ready to stretch their legs, let alone "get a little taste of what was to come" by taking a walk to the viewpoint our teacher had mentioned. Despite some light protests, everyone eventually got up from their seats and put on their jackets. Max and I did the same and were one of the first students to jump out off the bus. With our overly enthusiastic PE teacher as its leader, our hoard of lazy students started its pilgrimage to the viewpoint in the woods. In an attempt to take my mind off Joey and off the horrible things Georgy had said, I started to count my footsteps. Unfortunately, it did not work, especially when Derek's loud voice unexpectedly disrupted my focus.

“Hey, where did you disappear to this morning? You were suddenly gone after the tour, I was looking all over for you!” Derek exclaimed protectively while trying to match my pace. "Did something happen? I thought for a while that you were exploring the museum with Max and Georgy, but you were not with them when I saw them near the statue gallery." I remained silent and upped my pace, hoping that Derek would leave me alone if I kept ignoring him. “Come on, Simon, talk to me," he desperately uttered.

The viewpoint's deck towered above the treetops like a beacon and its full height slowly revealed itself to us as we neared the structure. Our teachers, who were luckily not completely devoid of empathy, decided to make the climb optional when they noticed the growing discontent on their students' faces. Most of my fellow classmates threw in the towel and loitered around the clearing instead of taking on the challenge, but I was not as easily deterred. Derek had never been the sportive type, so maybe this would be the perfect opportunity to shake him off my tail.

“Simon... Please wait,“ he whined when I started my ascend. He hesitantly halted in front of the steps and for a moment, I joyously believed that he had given up. But alas, I should have known better than to underestimate Derek and his stubbornness. By the time we reached the 50th step, he had stopped talking to me, but the death glares that he occasionally shot in my direction told me enough.

When we finally made it to the top, Derek instantly collapsed and kissed the wooden deck in a bout of sudden madness. "Holy hell, we made it! I hope everyone saw that because I will not be doing it again," he manically panted. His chest quickly rose and fell as he tried to catch his breath.

I walked over to the railing and wistfully stared into the distance as the wind gently tousled my hair. From up here, I could see that the carpet of tree tops beneath us stretched out for miles and miles in every direction, often giving way to small lakes, rivers and patches of frozen grassland. The water reservoirs of the woods sparkled like sequins in the bleak sun.

"You always get like this when you're upset." Derek stood up with a laboured sigh and dragged his feet over to me once he had calmed his ragged breathing. "You don't talk to anyone, you drown in your own self-pity and then you blame your horrible mood on the people around you. Sometimes I think it's a good thing that you have me to talk some sense into you."

“Can you blame me?!" I exclaimed angrily while I threw my hands up in frustration. "Georgy called me a slur, for fucks sake! I have a right to be mad at him! What kind of friend says such things? Not even Joey or Jacob would dare call me a 'flamboyant fag' and I’ve had beef with them for years."

Derek's gaze softened. "I'm so sorry that happened to you, I had no idea. Georgy is well-known to be a hothead, but I can't believe he would do such a thing. That behaviour is unacceptable." He appeared to be lost in thought as he looked out over the landscape. "I know what it's like to constantly be scrutinized for who you are. As head of the GSA, my sexuality is always on display and some people think that is an open invitation to make assumptions about my life, personality and identity. It's awful."

Derek's words touched me deeply and I immediately regretted my childish behaviour. "I'm sorry for avoiding you," I muttered. "Bottling up my feelings has always been easier than actually dealing with them, but talking things through with you helped a lot. So, thank you."

"You're welcome," Derek kindly smiled as he gave me a friendly pat on the shoulder.

I fiddled with the buttons of my coat before I continued. "I... I'm not sure Georgy actually meant what he said. Don't get me wrong, his actions were extremely hurtful, but I don't think he intended them to be."

"Well, if you're unsure, there's only one way to find out," Derek responded with a shrug. "Sometimes harmful actions simply originate in ignorance, but ignorance is something that can be fixed. It'd be a shame if you were to lose a good friend only because you are afraid to confront him about something hurtful he did."

“You’re right… I don’t want to lose you guys,” I relented. “I’ll go talk to him…”

"We're in the same boat, darling! Instead of fighting each other, let's stick together from now on, okay?" Derek lightheartedly replied. “Now, please explain to me how -in god's name- you can walk up the stairs so fast. I felt like I was going to die!"

I laughed. “Running away from my problems all the time has given me some great stamina, I guess.”