The Watch

I ran as fast as I could to the house, luckily Judy left and I didn't have to explain to her why I was so emotionally charged. I could barely stop myself from crying as if suddenly all the emotions were overwhelming me. I didn't know which of them was dominant, sadness, rage at myself, disappointment, fear, or maybe love after all.

I burst into my room and started going through my belongings. The item I needed was a hand-engraved pocket watch that Tristan was associated with. Such items important to spirits helped us summon them. We, as the mediums, managed without them, but with them, it was much easier. Anyway, ghosts were somehow drawn to them subconsciously, not so as to keep them permanently in some place, but they liked to check from time to time what was happening with their property.

This watch ended up in my hands completely by accident, a woman came to my office one day but refused to use my help. She gave it to me, saying she had a feeling it should belong to me. I remembered it because such things didn't happen to me often. I felt the watch was closely related to some spirit, but I wasn't going to go into it. I threw this watch in some boxes at the bottom of the closet and forgot about it until now.

After a while, Tristan showed up, and from then on, he became a part of my life. An inseparable part of ... Okay he pissed me off, but I got used to his presence over time. He was always by my side, and new memories of pleasant moments, polite gestures, common conversations, and laughs appeared in my head. Quite quickly, even though I kept repeating that I would like them to disappear, I found that I do not expect it at all. But I couldn't admit that I had changed my mind. Teasing has become a nice part of everyday life.

I got scared as I threw away the layers of things, and there was still no trace of the box in which the watch should have been. Fear began to fill my heart, I couldn't wait for Tristan to show himself after gathering enough energy, I wanted to see him and talk to him ... What should I tell him? I gave up searching for a moment, wondering if this was what I should have done, but then realized I owed him it. I was the bad one, at least I had to apologize for everything.

After a while, I exclaimed triumphantly, finally finding that damned watch, but again I had some doubts. I didn't feel confident knowing that I would have to admit my mistake. I had to pull myself together and understand what I felt myself, although so far I was sure that I knew it perfectly well.

A few times I almost grabbed my watch and then withdrew my hand, still trying to summon my courage and searching my head for the right words. I finally grabbed it and pressed it to my chest, pouring all my power into it and summoning the spirit. I didn't sense his presence yet, but I was afraid that when that happened, I wouldn't be able to speak my words, even though I wanted to see him so badly. I closed my eyes and felt that I couldn't hold back my tears any longer.

"Tristan, I don't know if you're already here, and if you can hear me well if you can't show up yet. I wanted to apologize to you for everything. I was mean to you and I couldn't appreciate how lovely you are. I don't deserve someone like you in my life. I've told you so many times to disappear." I laughed through my tears. "I really don't want this to ever happen. It turns out how selfish I am. I just want you for myself, and then I seriously meant that I love you. I needed alcohol to summon the courage to say it out loud. I'm sorry I couldn't understand it sooner. Please just come back to me, I miss you now more than ever." I still didn't feel his presence and just squeezed my eyes shut tighter. "Thank you for the gift, the bracelet is beautiful, I will wear it with pride and boast that it is my beloved's own handiwork."

Suddenly I felt someone hugging me, I recognized this specific spiritual touch without any problems. I let myself be embraced as if all the air was gone and I began to cry even more.

"I'd have been waiting for you forever, but it's nice you understood it a little earlier," Tristan replied, his voice weak but slightly amused. "I love you too."