Chapter 40:

My Big Bros are Protecting Me.

My Dad is an Otaku, My Mom is a Fujoshi, and I Wish I Was Dead


The sun is out, it's a beautiful day, and I'm skipping summer school. Why? Because obviously I've got more important things to do, like going out and shredding like a badass in public.

After weeks of practice, I feel like I've gotten better, and my bros are...well...slightly better than terrible. I'm not worried about it, though, because today all we need to do is play a few chords while the guy with the actual talent does his thing.

"Hey Tanakan, you wanna go pick up some bitches after this?" Acchan says cheerfully, leading us four with the bag containing the bits of his practice pad slung over his shoulder.

"I don't know, dude.." Tanaka replies, dragging his portable amp along. "The last time we did, some girl told me I looked like a clown and I should piss off, and then her boyfriend and his friends went after us..."

"So what? They were just jealous of how cool we were."

I hoped Tanaka's fashion sense had improved even a little bit, especially since we're gonna be performing in front of people today, but it's days like this where he chooses his worst outfits. That beanie does not go with his jeans that have legs wide enough to fit a small child in, and he's wearing a t-shirt over a longer t-shirt when it's at least 32 degrees out. Man, it's fucking hot today.

...And he's got an ugly-ass fake chain around his neck. I can tell it's plastic from all the way back here.

After a few minutes, we reach our destination- a spot by a pedestrian bridge that crosses over four lanes. We had to go all the way out to the east part of town because we didn't want to get hassled by people we know and shit- I'm trying to avoid the teachers that I know are out looking for me.

Now that we're here and setting our equipment up, I'm starting to get a bit nervous. Playing a street concert sounded like such a badass idea when it was just us four in the store, but now that we're out here, it's started to dawn on me what we've gotten ourselves into. What if I fuck up in front of all these people passing by? What if I forget everything I learned?

"Hey, kid, are you nervous?" I hear the deep voice and see the shadow darken my vision before I turn around to see Shige.

"A little bit."

"The first time I played in front of people I was seven. It never gets easier. Just follow my lead and you'll be alright."

"Thanks, Bro."

We're supposed to be a "band", but we're really just Shige and his backups. We decided that I was the backup guitar, because I know a little bit, Tanaka was the bass because all he has to do today is keep strumming one chord, and Acchan is the drummer because he liked hitting them really hard. You can't hear a drum pad over the sounds of electric guitars anyways, so it's not like he can do anything to affect the song.

"So listen to this, dude." Even though he's trying to screw his drum pad and stand together, Acchan hasn't stopped running his mouth. "Last night I took this home and I was listenin' to Coldsnow and I was like really fuckin' feeling it so I cranked it all the way up and I started WAILING on this shit, dude. Like, I was going ham on the pads, bro. I was slamming it like it was Kouga's girlfriend and my room was a love hotel- oh, sorry, Ryou- and my fuckin' dad comes in, drunk off his ass, and yells 'SHUT THE FUCK UP I'M WATCHING DOWNTOWN' and then he punches me!"

Slamming? Why would he want to punch Nee-san? Because she's annoying as fuck? Makes sense- wait, no it doesn't, gangster thugs leave women alone. You were the one who taught me that, Acchan, you dipshit.

"For real?" Tanaka looks at him with a slightly concerned expression.

"What? I hit him back."

I know Shige told me it would be okay, but I'm still too antsy to say much of anything, much less joke around like my big bros are doing. Acchan is such a dumbass that he probably doesn't even get nervous.

As I plug the guitar I borrowed from old man Mitsukoshi into the amp and start to play a few notes to feel it out, I'm drowned out by Acchan shrieking into a megaphone.

"Everyone, we'll be starting in five minutes!"

A few of the horde of people walking by briefly stop to look, but most keep on walking.

"We are..." He suddenly pauses. "We are...uhh..."

Turning toward Tanaka, he hisses in a low voice, "Tanakan, what the fuck are we?"

"A band."

"No, our name, dumbass!"

"I don't remember."

"Fucking idiot. Ryou! What's our name?"

Try as I might, I'm drawing a blank. "I don't think we have one."

"Are you fuckin' serious?! Shige! You remember?"

"The kid's right." Shige shrugs his shoulders. "We never came up with one."

"You fucking kidding me?! We had two fucking weeks to come up with it and you ain't done shit!"

"You didn't do shit either!" Tanaka hisses right back at him.

Quickly, I gaze over the tiny crowd that's stopped to watch, and a few of them are whispering to each other. Oh fuck, they think we're stupid. They're right about some of us, but not me.

"We got no name! What the fuck am I supposed to- Wait a minute!" It's like a lightbulb goes off over Acchan's ugly mulleted head. "No name, that's perfect!"

"We're Nanashi!" he announces over the megaphone after almost a minute's pause, then stands there proudly like he expects the small crowd to break out into wild applause. He gets no response.

There's definitely a band out there named something like that and we'll probably get sued but let's worry about another day.

Five minutes seems like five days when you're nervous. Not that I am nervous, but still...like I said before, this is the first time I've ever played an instrument in public.

No, I'm not writing the kanji for "person" on my hand and swallowing it. That's for kids and pussies. Shut the fuck up.

Alright. The guitar's in tune, at least. We're okay on that end.

"Hey everyone!" Acchan begins. Shit, it's time. Focus, Ryou. Focus. "We're Nanashi! Usually it's the guitarist who introduces everyone, but Shige didn't want to and Tanakan is too stupid to, so I'm doing it today!"

He didn't even mention me. I think he forgot.

"Oi!" Tanaka snaps, and I hear a slight giggle from the audience. There's actually about 10 or so people standing around, mainly old guys, but also a mom with her kids who have stopped to watch.

Please, Big Bros, for the love of all the Shichifukujin, keep your language PG in front of the kids.

"Anyways, I'm the drummer, I'm Atsushi, I'm 16, my favorite food is ramen-"

"Hurry up, dude, this ain't a self-introduction!" Tanaka snaps again. Now there's a louder laugh from the small audience we've gathered.

"That dude in the front is Shigehiro, he's our lead guitarist and the only one of us that actually has talent."

Shige responds by hitting a short guitar lick. He did that without even thinking, I bet. Maybe one day I'll get to his level, but that day isn't today.

"The tall guy is Ryou, he's the second guitarist...despite how he looks, he's a middle schooler."

A couple of the old guys are nodding respectfully. Damn, are they liking us? We haven't even played yet...I could get used to this...

"Dude, play something!" Tanaka hisses from behind me.

Oh, right. C. The first chord I ever learned and I let it fly.

"Finally, this idiot over here is...Tanaka...wait a minute...what's your first name?"

"None of your business," Tanaka growls.

"You gotta give the people what they want, dude!" Seemingly on cue, the audience laughs again. Now the crowd's grown by a few more- there are even a couple teenage girls watching us.

"Fine." Tanaka looks down. "...-nata," he says in a low voice.

"What? Can't hear you," Acchan says, pointing the megaphone in his face.

"Hinata. My first name's Hinata."

Immediately after, Acchan breaks down in screeching laughter. "No way! This dude's named Hinata!"

I know it's not really funny, but I can barely stop myself from laughing, too. Shige's wide, tanned shoulders are shaking and he's biting his lip really hard.

"How you doin', Hinata-chan-" Acchan can barely get it out before he doubles over, howling in laughter.

"I'm gonna kill you!" Tanaka whirls around and wrenches Acchan's collar. He would look a lot tougher if he wasn't wearing that dumbass clown outfit.

Now there's about 20 people standing around to watch, and most of them are laughing pretty hard.

Holy shit, dude, we might be popular.

"Alright, alright, sorry. Here's one from the Judo Generation. 1! 2! 3! 4!"

Before we can react, Acchan starts slamming the drum pad, and then Shige starts, a little behind him.

Shit, I wasn't ready! How did the backing guitar part go again? C, C, G, fuck, my hand slipped! A-

"Hold on, hold on." Shige stops playing abruptly. "Let's get back on the same page. Don't worry about it."

This time, he counts off properly, and we're all ready, so our song doesn't sound out of whack. I'm actually feeling pretty good about this. I'm keeping time, it sounds much better than I thought, and...

The crowd is starting to leave.

As I hit a Cdim, one of the girls mouths boring to her friend, and the other one mouths I thought they were a comedy act, and then they turn around and head down the sidewalk.

The mom with the kids leaves in the other direction, pushing her stroller, and the kids follow her like ducklings.

At the end of the song, only two old guys are still watching.

Do we really suck that bad?

"Alright! Y'all rockin' out?" Acchan crows. Once again, he gets no response.

"Our next one is from-" Suddenly, the two old men turn tail. "Hey, where are you going?"

"Oi, oi. Look what the cat dragged in!" The malicious voice comes first, and then I whirl around to see a big, long-haired guy wearing a jacket like a cape, slinging a baseball bat across his shoulders. Following him are several more intimidating guys with menacing grins.

Oh, fuck, it's another gang, and they look like they mean business.

"Minatozawa..." Acchan's clearly attempting to play it cool, but the nervousness in his voice is betraying him. "Fancy seeing you here..."

Shit. If there's one thing that all delinquents in Funabashi know (besides not messing with Reika Suzuran), it's not to mess with Shuu Minatozawa. He basically runs Higashi. He's only a high school third-year but allegedly he's got the local yakuza answering to him.

Where's an escape route? Fuck, we're trapped. They're blocking the bridge. The sidewalk behind me is open, but it's too long and wide and I'm certain they'd catch me before I could hide if I went that way.

"The fuck are you doing on my turf, Nakamura?" Minatozawa growls, getting down in Acchan's face and slinging the bat off his shoulder into the sidewalk below him. Acchan stands his ground, but I think I see him gulp. "You rich kids think you're fucking hard all the sudden 'cause you caught us slippin' that one time? You think you can run up on our block without that gyaru bitch and do whatever you want?"

"We're just having a concert..."

"A CONCERT?!" Minatozawa throws his head back and laughs, and the rest of his subordinates follow suit.

"I heard 'em, Boss, they fucking sucked!" yells a guy with a mohawk.

"You know what I think of your little concert?" Just like that, Minatozawa whips the bat off his shoulder and smashes it into one of the amps.

"Hey, we borrowed those, dude! Stop!"

My words came out before I could think. Fuck. Oh, fuck. I do not want to face the wrath of Minatozawa. Too late, though. He's already on top of me.

"I don't give a fuck where you got these from. But I do give a fuck about bratty little kids who think they can tell me what to do in my own neighborhood."

I swear his eyes are glowing red. It's like I'm looking at a demon.

If I do anything but grovel he'll kill me.

Suddenly, a shadow falls over me. When I look up, Shige is standing there with his arms outstretched. "Get away from Ryou." He hasn't raised his voice a bit, but I can tell he's furious.

A second later, Tanaka joins him. "Back off of Lil' Bro, fuckwad. I don't care who you are, you don't mess with him."

"Yeah!" Acchan exclaims. "You lay a finger on him, we're not gonna fuckin' forgive you assholes!"

Minatozawa laughs, and the cold, mocking chuckle sends a chill through my entire body. "What a cute family. You're so precious I could die."

Behind him, his gang members start to fan out. On the street, some of the people passing by have stopped, but this time it isn't to watch our concert. Instead, they're whispering to each other with worried expressions.

I'm getting really fucking tired of fighting people. These guys aren't gonna be scrubs like the Hall Monitor Brigade, either. They look like bad, bad dudes.

Suddenly, the shrill sound of a whistle explodes in my ears.

"Oh, shit, it's 12!" one of the Higashi gang members yells.

Another one cries, "Get outta here!"

One by one, they turn tail and book it.

A scowl crosses Minatozawa's face. "You won't be so lucky the next time I catch you on my turf." He slings the bat back over his shoulders and strides off, the crowd parting like the Red Sea as he goes.

"Are you okay?" The sound of shoes hitting the pavement comes from behind me, and then a couple frazzled police officers run up to us, see our instruments, and immediately stop.

"Hey, you can't play those here," the one in the front says.

"Sorry," Shige quickly replies, turning to the cops. "We're packing up and leaving right now." I'm with him- I absolutely don't want to run across the Higashi delinquents again. Those guys nearly sent me to my ancestors early.

As we start to walk off, one of the policemen says, "Hey, you, the tall one. Hold on a minute."

My blood runs cold as soon as I hear that.

As calmly as I can, I turn around. "Can I help you, officer?"

"Are you Ryou Shiritori?"

"Uhh...no?"

"Come with us, please."

Aw, son of a bitch.

Pope Evaristus
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Steward McOy
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