Chapter 2:

(2) Sakuya Izayoi ~ The Perfect and Elegant Maid

Touhou Futsuudou ~ Ordinary Maid, Extraordinary Realm


Our time is precious
Many flowering nights pass
Time and time again

“You think she’s alive?”

“She’s been laying here for a day. Do humans sleep that long?”

“…Wait, she’s just opened her eyes!”

Licorice Meidou woke up, yawned, and found herself being surrounded by a gang of little maids at her bedside. Most of them were observing here from a short distance, while one of the braver ones were busy playing with her hair. They all moved a couple steps backwards when she rose up from her slumber.

Having newly awoken, Licorice wasn’t sure of what to make of her situation. “Ou... Kakvo? Kŭde sŭm, po dyavolite?” Where was she… No, forget that, who was she? “Koi, po dyavolite, ste vie?” Who the hell were these people? She looked around the room, a dusty, dimly-lit one that only contained the bed she was sleeping on, and found nothing of use. Her memory only contained vague recollections of run-down concrete buildings, the interior of a grand church, or was it a mosque, scenes of the great outdoors… Nothing about herself, however. She couldn’t even remember her own name.

Licorice realized that the fairies were speaking another language than the one she had been speaking, one that she could vaguely remember. “Khm… A, khono gengov va hanasherŭi.” she turned to the little maids for help, with a heavy foreign accent of some kind to her Japanese speech. They took a few more steps backwards, cramping themselves as they had no more space to retreat from the frightening human. “…anyone know where I am?”

“We should get Lady Sakuya here, before she eats us.”

“She’s just a human, humans don’t eat fairies!”

“What if she does? Look at her, she’s chanting magic in some weird language! Help us, Lady Sakuya!” One of the maids ran, flying out of the room while the rest nervously watched their guest. There was much tension in the air, too much even, and Licorice was confused. What did I do? Murder someone? If I did, I don’t remember… I can plead for insanity, right?

A few minutes of tense stares ensued, before the door was suddenly swung open. “Alright, what are you Cirno-brained idiots yapping on about?” This new visitor was another maid, who stood tall in great contrast to the little maids. Her hair, tied into two braids that reached her shoulders, was white. Despite her white hair, she looked to be around the same age as Licorice. This must have been the “Lady Sakuya” that they were referring to earlier.

The little maids clung onto the hem of Sakuya’s skirt, shivering while keeping a close eye on Licorice. She groaned upon noticing the trivial thing that had made them fret so much. “Come on, she’s just a puny little mortal. Even you fairies could beat her in your sleep.” She expertly pushed away the fairies clinging to her. “Hush now, we have adult business to conduct.”

One of the little fairy maids tilted her head, curiously. “What kind of adult business is it, Lady Sakuya? The kind of business that two adults get up to in priv-” She couldn’t finish her sentence as a silver knife found itself lodged to the wall, right next to her head.

“What- Where did you learn that sort of indecent nonsense?” Sakuya furrowed her brows “Did that Patchouli not get my memo about not letting the fairy maids into the library?”

Licorice decided to interrupt things before they got out of hand. “Umm… Excuse me, Lady Sakuya, for interrupting your moment of anger, but could you tell me where I am?”

Sakuya suddenly turned her around to Licorice, as if she had only noticed her existence just now. “Right. Right, you’re here.” She proceeded to push and kick all the fairy maids out, before locking the door. “As I’ve said, we have some business to conduct.”

Licorice scratched her hair. “Uhm… I- I’ve honestly got no clue what you’re talking about. I’ve got no clue what I am, where I am… Would you happen to have any idea?”

Sakuya didn’t seem too pleased with Licorice’s convenient amnesia. “Great, and I thought that I could just dump you off at the Hakurei Shrine and send you back…” She sighed. “Are you really, really sure that you don’t remember who you are? Where you come from?”

“…No, but I’m pretty sure that I don’t come from here.” She was pretty sure that she had never seen fairies before “So, what’s this business you’re speaking of?”

“The business is…” Sakuya didn’t seem pleased to add another human to the mansion. She crossed her arms and looked away from Licorice as she spoke. “…the mistress wants you to work as a maid, for some reason.” She hoped that the mistress would come to her senses and let Sakuya cook Licorice-flavored pastries for tea time. Still, until that moment, she’d follow the orders of Remilia no matter what. “So, you either go back to the Outside World, or you stay here and work.”

Licorice thought of this offer for a while. She didn’t remember much about this ‘Outside World’, but it didn’t feel like a place like she could easily hop back to. Plus, considering the attitude of the maid, she probably didn’t have a choice in this matter either. “It’s probably better for me to stay here then.” She got up from the bed, it was probably too rude to be lying on bed while speaking to your future boss.

“Great, wonderful.” Sakuya was all too fussed. Still, she tried to maintain an exterior of perfection and elegance. “I’m Sakuya Izayoi. Glad… to be working with you.” This greeting was as artificial as greetings get.

“And I’m…” before Licorice could find a reply, Sakuya had the answer.

“You’re Licorice Meidou. The mistress declared so.” Licorice was shocked, normally you weren’t given your name when greeting someone.

“R- Right. I’m Licorice Meydoh, glad to meet you… and work with you.” She extended her hand, expecting a handshake. She got a bow from Sakuya instead. Guess they don’t shake hands around here… Licorice replied with an awkward bow of her own, accidentally butting heads with Sakuya as they bowed at the same time.

“Ow- Sorry, so sorry…” Licorice attempted to bow again in apology, this time Sakuya managing to barely dodge the unexpected barrage of headbutts coming her away.

“You-” The perfect and elegant maid was offended that a mere mortal had landed a hit on her, no matter the accidental and nonconsequential nature of the hit. She took a deep breath, summoning forth all her patience. “…you’ll need proper training. A lot of it.” Sakuya turned back, apparently retreating. “I’ll prepare you some proper work clothes soon, all of our stock is fairy-sized. Make sure to take a good bath tonight, I don’t want you stinking while I measure you.”

“A- Alright. I’ll be- I’ll be sure to work hard.” Licorice added a stifled and awkward laugh. She hoped that this faux pas wouldn’t come to affect her too negatively.

Right before exiting out of the door, Sakuya turned her head around as if she had just remembered something. “Oh, and one last thing.”

“Hm? What is it, Lady Saku-YA?!” As if she had just teleported, Sakuya had appeared right in front of Licorice. A cold knife of silver pressed against the mandible of our poor heroine, who had no capability of fighting against such a force. “E- err… he?” She was so nervous that she ended up making sounds that resembled something like laughter. Of course, it was clear that her situation was not one to laugh about; Licorice watched the head maid with open eyes and abated breath.

Sakuya’s voice was much deeper than before. “Make some foolish error like that again, especially one in front of the mistress, and you’ll be joining us for luncheon…” The knife dug deeper, piercing Licorice’s flesh. Small droplets of blood raced down a track of silver. “…on a platter.” The head maid leaned even closer toward Licorice, completely blocking her vision. “Do. You. Understand?

There was only one sane reply to Sakuya’s question. “Y- yes, ma’am!”

“Good. I’m glad to reach an agreement.” The knife retreated from Licorice’s mandible. Sakuya returned to leaving the room as casually as she did before. “Don’t forget to wash your current clothes as well. You’ve been lying on the mud for who-knows how long.” With this, the door closed behind Sakuya.

Licorice, all the tension suddenly released from her, collapsed onto the floor, hyperventilating and covered in a layer of cold sweat. She felt like she was going to puke, faint, and have a heart attack, all at the same time. Being met face to face with death, in form of sharp silver, didn't tend to be healthy for one's nerves.

The poor, newly-initiated maid only had one thought. What the hell is wrong with that woman?!

Ana Fowl
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