Failed Idol

''Eri Koji is a failure''

''Such a disappointment''

''You'll never amount to anything''

These are just some of the things I hear on a daily basis as an idol, should I give up already as an idol? Currently, under no groups, I am a alone idol a failed idol that won't break through to the main stage.

 Eri aged 19 still lives with her parents and is an idol. but she signs up for auditions and gets immediate rejections. She's in the dance club but is a backup dancer and doesn't shine in the spotlight as her fellow main dancers within the dance club.

''Eri get it together you are messing up our dance routine'' Shouted Becky

''I'm really sorry Becky'' Eri feathery voiced

''If you keep messing up you can just leave the dance club'' Becky threatened Eri

Eri quit the day after

Was the idol life really for her if she can't even dance well? All her grades were below average and overall didn't excel in anything in school.

''Miss did I fail again''

''Yes you did Eri'' the Teacher said with a disappointed tone

Eri never came back to school after that day

Her family life wasn't much better either, her dad having to work all day to provide for the family then only coming back at midnight to sleep, her mom staying at home with a rare incurable disease being bedridden.

                                                                                                                                                                  ''Mom I hope you feel better tomorrow''

I give a gentle kiss to my mom on the forehead every night before bed hoping that one day she wakes up from this illness.

Eri's Mom died during the night

It seems that everything she touched dies, almost similar to mythological creatures such as Medusa and Cockatrice anything that comes close in contact with them dies in an instant.

Is life really worth living anymore?

Eri's life is meaningless, the feeling of isolation a dream of being a star idol with an idol lifestyle fame and popularity it was all a mere imagination.

I really wish this was all just a nightmare

Eri sleeps through the days hoping to wake up from this horrid nightmare that was indeed reality, nothing can be changed nor erased. As a few days go by Eri is still depressed, and emotionless she still had to attend her mother's funeral.

I attended my mother's funeral I had no emotions I couldn't even feel sad anymore. I couldn't even cry at my own mom's funeral how pathetic. Everyone around me cried all of my family was in tears and I stood out like a sore thumb.

Downpour starts to hit with a combination of thunderstorms

Everyone rushes swiftly into their cars to get home as fast as they could, leaving Eri all alone with her dead mother in the coffin. With nobody around Eri lays her face on the coffin of her mother.

''I'm sorry Mom, I'm a disappointment in this world a complete waste of a life that somebody could've had and made use of... goodbye Mother I'll see you soon''

 Eri cries whilst walking out of the chapel, Eri walks directly into the rain without any care in the world as her life was already meaningless to that point. Stumbling through the raindrops with loud lighting, she had found her place of rest on a park bench.