Shark Attack

“Actually, I’m going to back up just a little.”

“Tell your story how you want to tell it, just get on with it.”

Luna was way more down about not getting to fight anything than Katya had first thought. She did get all dressed up, it was a lot of effort only to be told there nobody that needed to get fisted. Phrasing Katya, phrasing! She scolded herself.

“Before I got to the elf village and reunited with my friends, I had the misfortune of waking up in the middle of the surrounding forest…”

The flash of headlights and blaring horns gave way to daylight and screaming. Kara kneeled in the dirt with her hands over her ears, yelling in fear. She breathed heavily for a moment, nearly to the point of hyperventilation. She goes over herself with her hands. Last she remembered a truck had been about to run into them, and it was the middle of the night. She takes one last long, deep breath, and remembers that her hands are still cupped over her ears. She starts to remove them, but realizes that there something different about the feel and length; her ears were pointed. She was calmed down enough by now to attempt to take stock of the situation.

She looked down to be greeted by two ginormous breasts. Hello! She remembered those being way, way smaller. She carefully stood up, she was definitely taller as well. A steak of blonde hair passed by her eye, she brought her long blonde hair in front of her eyes. This was definitely darker before, she thought. She jumped up and down and was thrown off balance for a moment because the weight distribution was so different than what she was used to. Kara did some squats and lunges, something she rarely did before. All her muscles felt thicker and her stomach was so much more taught. She could feel every muscle in her body, it was more than a little disconcerting. While she couldn’t be called fat before, she wasn’t exactly the thin Barbie types like Camden and Kourtney with their thin waists, slightly-too-big-for-their-build chests, and their angular, symmetrical faces. Those two were basically models, especially when compared to Kara. Kara, of course, did her best to at least not be the ugly girl out, but there was no keeping up with them, so she focused on just being an ascetically pleasing tagalong and the occasionally supportive, if not sarcastic, best friend type.

Here and now though, she was no longer the same person. Kara finally took a look around at her surroundings. Tall trees overtook her vision, and a thin mist clung to the air. The air itself was mildly humid but not uncomfortable, some sort of honking that sounded like it came from a goose could be heard in the near distance. This was not the middle of the highway or anywhere near it. She continued turning around, something moved on her left, she shuffled around to see it. The only thing there was more mist, it was thicker here and the honking was louder. She took a step forward, she could make out something moving. She stopped dead in her tracks, it had yellow eyes and a thick rough looking face. There was some kind of monster in the mist. The monster disappeared and the mist moved with it, it was swimming through the mist as though in a pool. Kara had never encountered anything like this, she was frozen in fear. She’d always thought she was pretty tough but this was one of the first moments she felt genuinely afraid. The monster circled around her like a shark. She could make out a flat tail and three large “chimneys” spewing the mist the monster was swimming through.

“Lady Castanetta, get back!” A shirtless man with long brunette hair, rucksack pants, and chiseled abs landed right in front of her. “You’re not supposed to be this far out and of all the unlucky turns, a Mist Dragon appears. Your father will have both our heads when he hears.”

His hand begins to glow. This isn’t our world. The thought struck her like a shark attack from the deep blue. He forms a sword out of the light, it’s thin like a skewer. He claps and they multiply and shoot into the mist; both of his arms have begun to glow. The Mist Dragon fluidly maneuvers away from the skewers, the mist thickens further as the dragon frantically, yet purposefully, swims around spreading it across the entire area. The honking continues to get louder, but it doesn’t seem to be coming from the dragon.

“Stun” a pulse shoots out from the man and just barely misses Kara, but it manages to hit the shark, er, dragon who slows down slightly. The man takes a skewer and runs at the dragon as it floats on the bed of mist it’s created for itself.

Kara backs away, not wanting to get caught up in this fight but also not wanting to look away from her handsome rescuer. Just as the man is about to impale the dragon it shakes itself awake and zooms away, but the man manages to stick it’s tail. It lets out an annoyed screech and tries to shake him off, but he won’t let go. The man takes another skewer and begins using them to climb the dragon. It’s not very big and so it doesn’t take long for the man to get halfway up. The dragon zig-zags around frantically, it knocks the man into one tree and then another, but he’s undeterred, continuing to climb. He’s nearly at it’s head. This would have been a really entertaining show if it weren’t so life threatening, it reminded Kara of those theme park shows with the dolphins. She was tempted to take a seat and just watch, but as if to remind her that she was in a new, dangerous world, a warm breath blew her hair across her shoulders and tickled the back of her neck.

HONK! She turned around slowly to find a three headed bird with metal teeth. It was many times larger than the dragon. A small honk like the one she’d been hearing came from the bird’s back. Oddly, there was a baby “goose” on the back of the three headed bird. The large bird had reptilian eyes which gleamed hungrily at Kara. It’s other four eyes (two on each head) were focused on the dragon. “Honk, honk.” The duckling jumped from the birds back and glided into Annett’s arms. It swung back around to the big bird and honked. At the little one’s instruction the big bird focused all of it’s attention on the dragon.

The shark rolled around grating the man across the ground, forcing him to let go. It then refocused it’s attention back toward Kara, only to find a huge bird with silver fangs gleaming like a knife ready to cut into it’s dinner, “I was craving a bit of seafood tonight.” The shark let out a scared screech, “Woah, woah, take it easy, I was only playing, I uh… shit, I’m out.” and surprisingly decided to flee. They didn’t actually talk, that was just how Kara imagined the conversation playing out.

She turned to the little bird and glanced up at the big one. They didn’t seem quite as scary. “I came as fast as I could to your aid, my lady.” The little bird just honked at her, but that’s what she took it to mean. The little one was actually kind of cute. It had thick white and blue striped plumage and a silver beak, it was hard to tell these two were related. “That’s hurtful, I’m still plenty cute, even at my age, not that I’d want to be recognized as cute, I wouldn’t want that sort of reputation, no, of course not.” Or at least that’s what the big one’s eyes seemed to be telling her.

She finally remembered the man who was lying on the ground, she ran over to him. Upon inspection he seemed to be relatively unharmed considering the brawl he was just in, he appeared to just be unconscious. What to do now?

This clearly wasn’t her body, or her world. Her friends were probably in a similar situation, but she did feel like she owed this man, however useless he ultimately ended up being.

She slid her arms under his glistening body and braced herself, but it proved unnecessary as these new arms of hers were much stronger than anticipated. She lifted him into bridal carry threw him over Big Bird’s back before jumping on herself with Little Bird in hand.

“You know where were going right? I don’t”

Big Bird gave her a side eye which she didn’t need to translate, “I got it, you do you. I’ll just sit back here and-” without any warning or preparation the bird launched into the air. Kara grabbed hold of the thick, fluffy plumage and hung on for dear life, while cursing god or whatever being had put her in this predicament! Humans weren’t meant to fly! She cried internally.

A half-hour of unadulterated panic later she landed outside the Elf Village.