Our Biggest Fear (Sora's POV)

A cold breeze and a glum, cloudy sky cover the campus like a depressing canopy. It's October at Hokkaido University and I'm in the middle of my fall semester. Going to a nice university had been my dream as long as I could remember and I believed it would be the most magical experience of my life. Back home during my high school years, everyone was so fake. Friendships were shallow and relationships ended as soon as they started. Although I never show it to anyone I know, my biggest fear has always been being all alone. I was alone in high school and they were some of the worst times of my life. When given the opportunity to go to college, I jumped at it, hoping that this would be my moment to meet some people who would be with me for good. And now as I walk along the barren campus roads during the fall semester of my second year. I realized that my biggest fear is far from over.

I have just finished my morning classes and am slowly traversing back to my dorm for a nap before the afternoon classes begin. That's pretty much how my days have been spent the past year. Classes in the morning, back to the dorm for nap, classes in the evening, and then I come back to the dorm and do it all again tomorrow. Occasionally I work at a convenience store on campus, but my hours there aren't that much.

Because I applied for this college early, they had given me a single dorm room. Most people would be overjoyed about that. I mean you get privacy, more space, and don't have to worry about a bad roommate. However for me, being someone who doesn't have any friends here, having a single room is a nightmare. I spend my days and my nights alone. I'm not really out for attention or popularity. If I could just find a few people who'd listen to what I had to say, that's all I've ever wanted.

I walk into my dorm, closing the door behind me. There's a letter sitting on the floor in the entryway.

"A letter?", I say out loud despite no one being around to hear.

I pick up the letter and see that it's from Itsuki. She's the one friend I had in high school and she's currently a student at Kyoto University. I open the letters and run my finger through the lined paper while imagining her voice reading it in my head.

"Heyhey, Sora! How has Hokkaido been treating you? It's the same old back home. I know you're reading this with a confused look on your face, wondering why I'm contacting you through a paper letter in this day and age. Well as much as I'd like to say I'm spicing things up, the truth is I dropped my phone while walking to class and the screen shattered. Looks like I'll be writing to you until my phone gets repaired! Anyways let me know how you're doing, I MISS YOU! - Your best friend Itsuki <3"

I laughed from how a letter could be so short and stupid, yet so sweet. That's just the kind of girl Itsuki is. She has beautiful, long brown hair and stunning green eyes. Because of her more wealthy upbringing she has always been very traditional in the clothing she wears. Even in high school while all the girls flaunted their short skirts, Itsuki's was all the way at her knees. I poked fun at her for it, but of course I respected her in all seriousness. She has great grades, is athletic, witty, and hilarious. All the guys wanted her, but she knew better than to chase a high school boy. Her smarts are probably her defining trait and are what I really love about her.

I walk to my bed and take a seat looking at the letter some more and then pulling my phone out to check if I have any messages. Just like usual, it's only texts from my father and grandmother asking if I'm okay or if there's anything I need. My dad is an amazing man, sending me to college on his income alone. My mother left us both when I was five and although she was the one who backstabbed my dad, he's remained single. I really hope he finds happiness, however I will say my mom leaving has built a really nice relationship between me and him.

As I finish looking through my phone I begin to doze off and fall asleep for a few hours. I am woken up to the sound of my phone ringing and to my surprise I see the call is from Tachibana-Kun. The president of the university's photography club that I'm in.

I pick up the call to hear a rather high and crackly voice for a male

"Ishioka-San?" he says

"Y-yeah" I respond, wondering what it is that he wants

"I am calling to inform you that tomorrow the club will be taking a trip to the markets that are near the ocean and taking photos there. Is this something you're able to make?" He says, with a tone of excitement

"Sure!" I say with fake enthusiasm, "I'll be there."

"Alright! I will see you and the others tomorrow then. Have a nice evening, Ishioka-San"

"Yeah, you too, Tachibana-Kun.", I hang up the call with a straight face.

It's not like I dislike the photography club, in fact I love photography. But I thought that it would be a nice chance to make some real friends with a similar interest to me. However all it's really been is small talk and acquaintanceships with the club's members.

I look at the time and see that it's already time to leave for my afternoon classes. I let out a large sigh, grab my coat, and prepare to go back out into the cold and walk to my classes. With each passing day, I lose more and more hope of finding that group of people that I can laugh with, cry with, struggle with, and most importantly just talk with. I crave friendly, genuine interactions all the time. Is it really too much to ask for? My biggest fear rages on and I have no idea when I'll be at peace. I guess the only thing I can do for now is continue on as per usual.

Sora puts her blue headband pack on her short, silver hair, preparing to walk out into the gloomy Hokkaido air. She often finds herself wondering if this fear she has is unique to her. Do others fear being alone as well? Do others crave another person to rant and communicate to? Unfortunately Sora wouldn't know, because she's never had a serious talk about her feelings before. But that was about to change. Tomorrow would bring a big breakthrough for Sora. However, not exactly in the way it would be most commonly imagined..