Chapter 11. Bats > Batman

Oh, hi, it’s me again. Last time we ended things pretty abruptly didn’t we. I was too pissed that I didn’t get a skill from the skeletons so I decided to just stop monologuing.

Anyways, it’s been about another month and half and we have been making good progress on some bats. With how common bats are in different games, there are many different types of bats that spawned in dungeons and what we discovered after some testing is that each type that had a different name has its own kill counter.

Naturally, I have come to the conclusion that if they have a different kill counter, once I hit 100,000 I should get a new skill and based on that theory, we have been busy doing as many level E dungeons as we could that spawn all kinds of bats.

Zubat, dracky and stirge happens to be the most common types of bats in level E dungeons and with their low magic resistance, my thunderbolt + poison combo made fast work on those flying critters.

If you are wondering why we are hunting bats while I said a while ago that I am specifically looking to gain magic resistance. Well, having the chance of getting 3 additional skills before the exam is too great of an opportunity to pass up and after knowing how much money Emma already spends on me each month. Getting her to buy me some extra equipment that will boost the stats I am lacking seems to be the best course to go.

And who knows, maybe one of those three motherfuckers will end up surprising me and give me exactly what I’m lacking.

“THUNDERBOLT!” I screamed as I zipped a group of zubats to ashes while Emma went around engaging and gathering more of those flying fuckers.

With how weak all of the bats are, I am having flashbacks to our goblin hunting days and even with 3 chances to get something good. I don’t have high hopes and feel like I will have to count on my rich blondie to get me into the doors of Tokyo Academy.

Speaking of which, with only 2 weeks left until the entrance exam, I am getting more and more antsy and excited. Sure, hunting with Emma is fun and great but we pretty much do the same shit all day every day and I need more stimulation in my life!

School has always been a snooze fest up until now. With Emma stalking me and attending the same school ever since kindergarten. I haven’t had a chance to make any other friends.

All the boys hated me because of their jealousy that I got such a cute blondie always following me around and while none of the girls would even think about approaching me when they find out Emma is the daughter of Christopher Lionheart.

All my school years from kindergarten all the way up till now, I have had literally a single fucking friend that’s not Emma and that person is a fucking friend on the forums. That had made my school life rather boring. No, I am not blaming Emma so stop making shit up. I am simply saying that because of who she is, it made me not able to have a single friend.

With no guy friends to talk about games or discuss girls with and no girl to make out and do other things with. School life was BORING as fuck! I just show up to class, listen to the teacher talk about random shit, trying my best to learn what I think is important and the only reason I put in the effort to pass all my classes is because of my destiny to go to Tokyo Academy.

If acceptance to Tokyo Academy didn’t require one to graduate from highschool, I would have dropped out of school the moment I gained that ability from the slimes and just spent all my time hunting low level shit trying to grind out as many abilities as I could.

Sadly, the mother fucking school cares more than just how strong you are and if you want a chance to attend, you need at least basic highschool level knowledge. Like why? How the fuck is me knowing how to do calculus gonna help me fucking slay a behemoth?

But fucking rules are rules and to achieve my eventual goal, I had to go through with the boring studying and at least do decently with my studying. And between school, my job. The amount of time I got to spend hunting is much more limited than I would have liked.

But Ken? How is Tokyo Academy going to be any different if Emma is still going to be there with you? Aren’t you still going to just have this one single friend and school life continue to be equally boring? Hell no it aint!

First, Tokyo Academy is only for those that want to become a full time licensed hero so obviously the classes will be geared towards the dungeon. How exactly? I don’t fucking know. But I will find out once I get accepted.

Second, It’s where the top of the top will gather. Those that got selected are the best of the best. Unlike the chicken shits that goes to my public school who are all jealous of my relationship with Emma or too scared to talk to me because of her, I am hoping that the people we will end up meeting will be more interesting.

“THUNDERBOLT!” I screamed once again, as more shitty bats of all sorts got zapped to death and with that, my kill counter reached 100k on all three and like music to my ears, DING DING DING, I got 3 fucking popup windows ready to be opened!

“3 fucking popups Emma! Get our asses out of here and let me open some new fucking skills!” I asserted and of course, my beautiful blondie followed my instruction without question.

After we left the dungeon, we sold our extra worthless shit that’s barely even enough to buy some boba tea and headed for a local park to open my skills. Emma still refuses to just go to a coffee shop or boba shop after I gained a skill. I bet that Albert really traumatized her when he burst into that boba shop all those months ago.

“Hurry up Ken! Let me know what you have gained!” Emma asked excitedly while holding my arm as we sat on a park bench ready to see the results.

Obviously, the stalking jealous butler is right by us not happy with how close Emma is but sadly for him, he can’t do shit about her love for me.

Have I bullshitted enough to drag the reveal? No? Fuck! Oh well, guess I will get the reveal over with and move on to something else next time.

“Passive skill acquired. Stirge Soul. Passive bonus(Always Active), +20 to speed, additional bonus skill, Passive Skill(Always Active), Blood leech. What the fuck? Only 20 fucking speed as the only stat? The fucking blood leech passive better be fucking good.” I commented as I clicked on the detailed screen for the bonus passive.

“Blood Leech, Gain 1% health from damage dealt from all sources. Can not gain above max hp. Crit does not apply to passive skill.”

“That’s pretty good Ken! You are getting free healing! Very useful for sure! Hurry! What’s next” Emma commented while rushing me to see the next skill. Calm down blondie, let me digest one skill at a time.

As Emma said, while the stat boost was nothing to write home about, my poison DOT has proven to be very useful and based on the description alone, I felt that this passive hp leech would also come in handy except for one issue.

“Emma.. You do realize I only got 51 hp right? Without the ability to fucking level, I would either need another passive that grant me massive amount of hp or a bunch of gear to make this skill useful or else I still won’t be able to do anything expect the lowest level dungeons.”

“Ken. Shut up and hurry up! I want to know what other skills you got!” Emma shouted excitedly while shaking me.

Did my blondie sidekick just tell the fucking protagonist to shut up? Since when did she get so aggressive? Is my language rubbing off on her? Oh no you didn’t! You fucking butler! Did you just sneer when she told me to shut up?

“Passive skill acquired. Zubat Soul. Passive bonus(Always Active), +10 to speed, +10 to poison resistance, additional bonus skill, Active Skill(Cost 200 mana per cast), Supersonic” I said, deciding to be the bigger person and not make a big deal out of my sidekick’s comment while scrolling to see the detailed information on this supersonic skill.

“Supersonic - baseline, 5% chance to stun enemy for 1 second. +2% chance, +1% duration boost per luck. If crit, double chance of stun and duration. For 200 mana, 5% chance of stun is pretty shit. But I guess if I can get some luck it could be useful.” I added.

So far, while the stat boosts from the bats aren’t all that, I have gotten some pretty interesting additional passive skills. Not giving Emma the chance to tell me to shut up or hurry up, I moved on to the third passive from that derpy looking dracky shit. Doubt I would get anything useful since those motherfuckers where weak as fuck and looked like a bunch of flying shitballs.

“Passive skill acquired. Dracky Soul. Passive bonus(Always Active), +10 to speed, +10 to dark resistance, additional bonus skill, Passive Skill(Always Active), Lucky Star +255 to luck. What the fuck did I just read?" I said in disbelief, while checking my overall stats window to verify and surely enough at the end, +255 fucking stats to luck.

“You know Emma. I think whoever created my system is just fucking with me. Worthless slimes and this fucking sack of shit provided me max stat boosts while fucking killing skeletons in fucking level D dungeons got me nothing. I think I am getting trolled and should just fucking kill whatever is the easiest from now on.”

After deciding to hunt some bats because they were easy shit to kill and not expecting much, I ended up gaining some pretty useful skills and 255 fucking luck. With this stat boost alone, my supersonic stun now has over 25% chance to stun for over 2.5 seconds.

Well, that was a great fucking hunt if I do say so myself. With only two weeks left until the exam, it’s time for me to bucket up, get my blondie to order me some final gear upgrades and show the fucking world that Ken as arrived. We don’t need no fucking batman with his lame powerless ass here to save the day, as long as we got more bat monsters to slay, even this level 0 motherfucker can reach the pinnacle of power!