Chapter 21:

Chapter 21. Origin Story

The Hero Who Can't Level


“Well? How did our party do compared to all the other dungeons?” I questioned Mia while taking a bite out of my pork cutlet and indeed, it was juicy and delicious.

“Obviously I did the most damage out of our dungeon. You did the second most and overall, our party ended up doing 40% of the total damage.” Peasant 1 replied while continuing to scroll to see the other results.

“Fucking bunch of npcs. If those fuckers actually carried some weight we would have finished that shit way faster.” I replied while trying a potsticker which was equally good.

“HEY! Don’t steal my food!” Peasant 2 shouted at me like she had any say in what I can and can’t eat.

“Wow! This one dungeon, they cleared the boss in under 2 hours! This one party of 6 did 90% of the damage! They must be super high level with an optimized strategy!” Mia shouted like I care what some npc did. But 2 fucking hours? That is pretty impressive.

As China girl continued, other than the 2 hour clear, a few more dungeons got cleared in the 5 to 6 hours range with a few decently performing parties. All in all, about 50% of the dungeons failed to get cleared by the test takers and our time was middle of the pack with plenty of dungeons still going when we cleared ours and headed home.

“At least I was the standout in our dungeon. I wish I did the most damage but it’s not like China girl here can even pass Japanese highschool to qualify anyways.” I replied knowing that with her broken Japanese, there is no way in hell she could pass high school Japanese and meet the minimum requirement of graduating from highschool to qualify for Tokyo Academy.

“What are you talking about? I already passed the test for a highschool diploma and just been going to dungeons and getting stronger. You can make fun of my Japanese all you want but it’s only because I never had to speak it. With our party’s performance I am pretty sure we will get invited for the interview and I do need to talk more so I can improve before the interview.” China girl replied.

What the fuck man! Does that mean she might make it to the academy? What happened to them not fucking being reoccurring characters? Who decided this fucking bullshit!

“Why don’t we get to know each other better since we will probably end up being classmates.” China girl said, as if she was sure she would make it already.

“My name is”

As peasant 1 started talking about whatever, I decided to completely tune her out as I helped myself to some more food.

“HEY! Why did you steal my pork cutlet!” I yelled at peasant 2 for having the audacity to steal my food.

“You took 3 of my potstickers!” Peasant 2 retorted like that’s justification for stealing my food.

“So peasant 2, I know China girl is here in Japan because she is not good enough to make it in China but why are you here?” I asked.

Not that I care at all, I just want her distracted so I can take some more of those potstickers. They taste pretty damn good. Should I get Emma to just order me some? Na, fuck that, I will just take more from peasant 2 instead.

“I am from a poor family in Russia. Unlike the academy here in Japan where they will cover all boarding expenses and provide food and even pay for dungeon fees. Back home, even those that make it to the academy still have to pay tuition, boarding and food while the academy also takes 50% of the dungeon rewards.” Blonde Jr answered. Man, sounds like Russia is a shithole for hero wannabes.

“Jeez, you are almost making me feel bad for taking your food.” I replied as I took a few more potstickers from her plate while blocking her attempt to take my pork cutlets with my masterful chopstick defending skills that passed down from generation to generation of chopstick kung fu masters.

“Emma. What do you see in this guy anyways? He is so rude, selfish, disrespectful, offensive... I am running out of words to describe him!” China girl asked and with her limited Japanese, described me with a few terrible adjectives which none actually describes me at all. I still wonder how this China girl was able to pass Japanese. Me, offensive? Psh… Please.

“We met when we were five. I entered a dungeon for the first time ever thinking I could take on the slimes no problem. But I got overwhelmed until he showed up and defeated the swarm! He told me to join his party and I have been with him ever since!” Emma replied happily. Mmm, is that how it really went? Shit was so long ago that I think.. Oh shit! I Remember now!

I was a cheeky kid back then, since everyone started at level 1 and needed 100 exp to level while I was starting at level 0. I thought I was the chosen one that got an extra level and skill over everyone else. I laughed at the fools but it turns out, my stupidass thought a fucking infinity sign was a shitty written 8…

Anyways, I remember begging around and asking people whenever I could and eventually got enough money to pay for the entrance fee one day and with my wooden shield I also begged for, my 2def was enough to prevent any damage from the slimes as I happily entered my first ever dungeon.

But those motherfuckers were unkillable! They kept on bouncing around on me knocking me over because I was a little fucking kid and I could barely get any hits in and all I did was 1 fucking damage per hit and after struggling for who knows how fucking long. I was ready to call it quits until I saw her.

Some blonde kid getting swarmed by another mob of slimes doing nothing but getting jumped on and a light bulb popped in my head. I ditched trying to fuck over the slimes I was dealing with and rushed over to the kid and started getting free hits in! It was perfect! I ended up killing the 7 slimes!

Since I thought I only needed 8 exp to level at the time and it was getting so fucking late because I couldn’t do shit for so long. I asked the kid if she wanted to party up for the next day and she agreed to my masterplan.

Obviously I only asked her to party up because I couldn’t afford to pay the fee to enter another dungeon and this blondie must be rich. Why else would some foreign be here in Japan right? My plan was perfect. Free dungeon entrance and a free meatshield to boot!

“Eh? So you were a nice kid once upon a time and saved Emma in the dungeon?” China girl asked suspiciously. What? You don’t think someone as nice and kind as myself would save her from danger?

“I am and always have been a chivalrous and gentle, kind hearted gentleman.” I replied. I guess Emma forgot what I used to call our party. No need to remind her, she can keep on having her fantasy about her knight in shiny armor coming to her rescue. I will just keep this to myself.

I guess there you have it, the origin story of Ken and the OG Meatshield.

Before you assholes bash me for taking advantage of a purehearted blondie. I am sure she benefited greatly from having me around. Now that I think about it, maybe it was I who was taken advantage of?

Afterall, when realizing I couldn’t fucking level, I was ready to call it quits and stop hunting the stupid slimes but she kept on coming over daily and asking me to hit up the dungeons and I was too nice of a gentleman to refuse her invites. So who took advantage of who? I think I am the victim here!