Look Back (Part 3)

There were people in this world who disregarded any and all social conventions. They lived by their own rules, said what was on their mind and never pretended to be anything but themselves. ‘Courageous, brave, mettlesome’ some would call them, some might even call it ‘spunky’ if they were one themselves. Others would call it ‘mindless, foolish, pea-brained’. Yet sometimes, such binaries failed to nail down the eccentricities of some individuals.

A thick air of unease had settled in amongst the host of people who had gathered to listen to the tall tales of one such individual. Suffice to say, it was a story quite a bit more… difficult to digest. Some of them slowly walked away with plain disgust in their eyes. Others reacted violently- their nauseated faces painfully visible as they rushed off to get some air and breathe.

The remaining few had a look on their face as if they would rather wash down a handful of nails with the cafeteria gruel. And yet, they didn’t walk away. Because there were people like Luke Rogers. People who would lie, gaslight and do whatever the hell they wanted to do if it meant that things would potentially turn out to be entertaining. And for those few who remained, whether it was morbid curiosity or a genuine affinity to masochism, it had worked.

When the story came to an end, the gathered crowd dispersed slowly. In shuffling steps and gestures of goodbyes. Broken laughs slowly turning into whispered discussions. No one had bothered saying anything to Luke. What could they even say? Luke had decided to rob a very dangerous grave today after all.

He had a unique way of looking at things, certainly. But it did mean that on a particularly bad day, as it was today, some people would definitely be willing to mix and match some binaries in their scathing remarks. Feedback isn’t always kind after all, is it?

“Are you just a scatterbrained inconsiderate nutjob?” Mat’s words were certainly not off the mark considering the circumstances. I was inclined to agree. “Do you think it’s funny to dramatise a serious incident like that?”

“It’s not real, so it’s fine right?” Luke had a pleasant look on his face despite everything. The face of someone expecting things to be this way.

“Do not push me Rogers.” Mat looked deadly serious. A far cry from his usual snarky self.

“Oh yeah? What were you doing when a classmate of yours got humiliated and excised to the point that he doesn’t even come to school anymore?” Luke replied, staring right at him.

Luke was of course talking about the real Michael. Michael Baker. The class pariah who had suddenly stopped coming to school. No explanations as to the why. No one even mentioned the fact that he was gone. It was almost as if he had never existed. And yet, Luke had brought him back up again. And if even that wasn’t enough, he had made it abundantly clear who the two people orchestrating the whole thing had been.

“You have absolutely zero clue as to what’s going on here, do you?” Mat said softly. “I didn’t just sit there and suck my thumb when a guy in our class fell off the face of the world. Not that you guys would know anything.”

“What, you go to the dude’s house to ask if he’s okay? Hand him stacks of notes? Just like he did that day when he got dunked into Quehenna?”

“Better than you guys doing fuck all. You were busy jerking off to yourself like the pretentious hack you are. Neil was too busy worrying about Coulson all the damn time. And Luis just doesn’t give a rat’s ass because that little piece of shit has zero sense of empathy for anyone he doesn’t know.”

“Mat.” I took a deep breath trying to calm myself. “Let’s not start throwing shit at each other. Please?”

“Oh shut the fuck up.” Mat turned and walked towards me. “You are the worst of them all, you know that? You do nothing, you say nothing, all you do is goad people into doing things. Why did you have to make Luke tell a story today, huh?”

That wasn’t my intent- No, of course not. I couldn’t have had anything to do with it. He had always meant to tell this story today, right? But it was true that if I hadn’t said anything, Luke might have just spent the rest of his time theorising wildly.

“I am sure Luke had put two and two together already. And yet, he was content with not doing anything with it.” Mat continued. “I am sure he would have never even thought about such an effective way to shout things aloud if not for you, Neil.”

Luke laughed out loud. It sounded uncanny in the otherwise sombre atmosphere of the class.

“James. Please. Tell your boyfriend to not use his few remaining braincells trying to figure out what goes on in my head. He’s really not cut out for it.”

James had stayed quiet throughout the whole affair. He probably intended from the start to not get involved. At least until he was called out.

“All bark and no bite, Luke.” James smiled. “Instead of worrying about Mat, you should go get an MRI scan done. See if all that grey matter in your head completely evaporated all of a sudden.”

Mat snickered. I suddenly noticed that Luis wasn’t present with us anymore.

“Besides.” James continued, looking at me now. “Mat’s right. You are partly responsible for this Neil. Obviously you had no idea of knowing what Luke was gonna pull right there, but you aren’t an idiot. You should have known better than to put a big red flag in front of a blazing bull.”

“Stop it.” Luke said aloud before I could. “He already has a massive self-blame complex going on with Coulson. You guys wanna involve me with him too?”

I opened my jaw but no words came out. Self-blame complex? What the fuck was he talking about? And then I saw James and Mat lower their heads and nod along.

“Excuse me?!” My surprised reaction was ignored.

“Actually, you do have this thing where you start blaming yourself for literally anything that you can connect to yourself in some way.” Daniel spoke out. Like James, I suppose he had been planning to stay out of it. “I do agree with James and Mat that you did kinda start this mess but hey, who knows if Luke wouldn’t have done the same anyway?”

“Actually no, I wouldn’t-” Luke got hit with a karate chop right on his head. “Ow!”

“Ah, that felt good.” Mat moved back and took a seat again. He looked my way. “You wanna say something or are you alright just looking at us like a dummy?”

“Uh, well.” I had kinda lost track of what was going on anymore. When exactly had the mood shifted again? “I am sorry…?”

“Sure. Don’t try to ride this specific bull next time.” I nodded. Then all three of them stared very expectantly at Luke.

“Don’t look at me like you want something good to happen all of a sudden.” Luke sighed as their stare intensified. “Fine… do I need to explain myself now?”

“Please. Go ahead.” Daniel replied.

“Actually, does anyone know where Luis is?” I asked before Luke could start.

“No idea.” James replied. “I did see him talking to some folks standing in the back, but I have no idea where he went after that.”

I suppose it made sense that Luis had an actual friend group too. But as I spotted his bag still lying on the floor, it made me curious what was so important that he had run off without even taking his bag.

“Anyway, there’s a very simple reason why I decided to bring up the story.” Luke started. “I wanted more people to be aware of the fact that a student in our class had suddenly dropped out. And also remind them how they didn’t ever care to find out why.”

All of us stayed silent.

“That’s a lie. I have never really cared either. It was just really funny saying that out loud.”

All of us sighed, as if we had been expecting this exact response.

“How did you find out about this, by the way?” Daniel asked. To be frank, I was curious too.

“How did you hear about it?” Luke asked back.

“Me? I- I guess mostly gossip and what I heard from Mat and James.” Daniel replied. He then raised his eyebrows in suspicion. “Don’t tell me you made up everything from hearsay.”

“I visited him myself a few days after he stopped coming. What do you take me for, an amateur?” Mat guffawed. Luke chose to ignore him.

“You went out of your way to do that?” When had Luke forsaken his ‘energy-conservation’ philosophy? Or maybe… Hm, it was possible that he was just a terrible sucker for mysteries. That seemed highly likely, now that I think about it.

Luke ignored me this time around.

“Why didn’t you tell us?” Daniel asked. “Not that we know each other that well, but it seems pretty topical considering what you were talking about earlier.”

“I didn’t see a reason to mention it. I was just curious about things, I had no plan of doing anything with his testimony back then.”

“So what changed today? Why tell this story?”

Luke raised his index finger and whirled it around.

“Did you not notice the atmosphere in the class today?”

“What do you mean?”

“Everyone had this look of sympathy and pity on their face whenever someone mentioned Sam Lake and the ‘accident’ that had befallen him. It’s kinda infuriating to listen to all of it when you know the things he has been involved with before.” Luke grimaced. “Neil telling me to get in the mind of the criminal only made me remember the things Michael had told me. Who even cares about my made up stories? Real life is so much wilder than fiction.”

Luke paused and looked around. Most of the people had dispersed after the dispersal bells had rung. Some remained sitting in far corners, working on projects or copying notes. Others waited for their friends, phone in hand and not a care in the world. If not for Luke, today would have been an afternoon just like any other.

“I noticed things when I went to Michael’s place. Things that immediately made it clear why he had become the outcast of the class.” Luke continued, a weary expression on his face. “I dramatise things all the time in my stories, but trust me the guy is straight up a nutjob. He tries to hide behind his literary façade but the stuff he reads? Nasty, twisted works that should never be taken at face value. And yet, he treats them like holy gospel.”

“You talk to him about that stuff?” Mat asked.

“Sure. Enough to understand why they had chosen him to be their subject of humiliation that day.”

“You think he deserved it?”

“Look, he’s a piece of work. But he’s also a massive coward afraid to stand out. Was he a creep who thought about women in exclusively objectified ways? Sure. Did he deserve to get thrown into a river because of it? I don’t think so.” Luke sighed. “He is harmless, is all I am saying.”

“Your words and your actions aren’t adding up.” Daniel noted. “Luke, did you seriously not think about who the mob will lynch next?”

Luke tilted his head in confusion.

“Luke, you just informed the whole school about an incident connected to a person who’s been hospitalised. When the police start looking at this cast in earnest, who the hell do you think is gonna top the suspect list?”

“It was gonna be Michael either way, right? No matter how you think about it, someone who got disgraced to that extent has plenty of reasons to take revenge. Even if I hadn’t told the story, someone would have tipped off the authorities anyway. At least this way, everyone now knows what went down and because of whom. Whether they choose to believe it or not, is another matter entirely.”

“Oh my god, he really didn’t think it through.” Mat banged the bench in frustration. “Luke, did you seriously think that the victim of an ‘accident’ would willingly tell the authorities how they were involved in an almost-murder?”

“But the people who were present could-” Luke froze up. His mouth opened and then closed, swallowing the words he was going to say. As if he had suddenly realised a fatal flaw in his thought process.

“You just made it easier for them to pin the blame on a single person. Knowing this town, they won’t even bother looking for the real malefactor anymore.” There was a sense of disappointment and anger in James’ otherwise reasonable tone. “You probably just let an actual offender get away with ease. Luke, why? Why do this?”

Luke looked like he had seen a ghost. Nay, something far worse.

“It’s two birds in one stone, if you think about it. The police will have a major suspect for their case and the Lakes can get away without ever admitting that their son was involved in something like that.” Daniel said, ruffling his hair. “What I am worried about is- Well, actually maybe it’s not something you should worry about. For now.”

“Luke, you okay?” I asked him. He looked back with an expression of guilt streaked across his face. As if it was all catching up to him just now.

“Guess I fucked up pretty bad, huh?”

None of us could bring ourselves to say anything as he took his bag and slowly walked out of the class.

None of us would ask questions when Luke Rogers didn’t come to school the next day. Nor the day after. Not until a week had passed by and a little birdie flew by bearing news. News that Luke Rogers had been taken into police custody.

Defamation, Daniel would later tell us, was a pretty serious crime.