50/50

A new morning, a new day, a new puddle of tears I rest my head in. I’ve been wide awake most of the night. A whirlwind of thoughts were running a marathon in my mind. This time it is somewhat different from the other mornings but still the same at its core. I can’t help but feel guilty for not telling Minato-San that I’m actually a boy parading a very feminine appearance. Minato-San seems so nice and genuine. It feels impossible to be in any type of relationship, romantic, friendly, or otherwise. All because of this secret I’m choosing to keep. It just feels like I can’t tell anyone now, because everyone will think I’m purposely deceiving them.

Not only that! Apparently, someone in my class discovered this secret! Somehow this kid from my class is a world famous detective and was able to uncover my secret in one week! What am I supposed to do about this person? The situation itself really isn't even that frustration, what makes things so intolerable is that it feels as if they are toying with me or something! Barely into my first year of High School and I’ve somehow made an enemy! What nonsense…

◑ ◒ ◓ ◐

“Konchiwa, ore wa Kiyoshi Tadokoro.”

Well this is quite the first impression. Unlike most of the other male students, Kiyoshi-San seems rather petite. Not much taller than me. He still seems as mysterious as before when I first saw him. I’m pretty sure his intentions for the letter aren't going to be what I expect.

Oh, great he’s walking up to me. Why is he so close!

“Hm, you are actually pretty cute.” Kiyoshi glared quite close to my face.

“AH-!” I released a short shriek of embarrassment.

“What? You don’t think the same?” Kiyoshi calmly remarked.

“Um, well oh, no. Not really.” I explained.

“Hmm, interesting.” He said quietly then walked around me with the sense of a scientist making observations on an experiment.

“Oh, hey! You’re that weird kid that sits in the back of the class!” I shouted with a realization setting in and to break this seriousness of the situation.

“Hhuh!!! Why do you say it like that-?!” Kiyoshi shouted back with a similar comic exchange.

“Humph, nevermind… I gave you that letter to learn a little more about you, as well as to confirm if my suspicions about you are true.” He then explained.

So this is my second admirer. I can’t deny that they’ve piqued my interest. The only issue is what are Kiyoshi’s intentions with meeting me? With all this in mind for whatever strange reason, I don’t feel as anxious as I think I should be from someone that claims to know my secret. Not quite sure what to do moving forward.

“Uhhhh… I don’t know what you're talking about, what do you mean ‘suspicions’? Heh-heh…” I slowly stuttered.

“Nothing wilts faster than laurels that have been rested upon. I’ll end this meeting by saying: I know every secret in this school, I’m going to give you another letter soon about what I want to learn.” Kiyoshi explained as he walked into the school.

Huh?! What was that?! That’s all?! Now what?!

◑ ◒ ◓ ◐

Knock, Knock.

“Ohayō! Come in!” I said somewhat shouted after my flashbacks of yesterday ran freely in my head.

“Ohayō, Hiromi. Oh, you already did your makeup.” Motoko slightly opened my door to her surprise that I already had my makeup ready.

“Oh, yeah, I, uh, couldn’t sleep so I got up to get an early start.” I explained with a low tone.

“Yeah? Is everything alright?” Motoko walked in and sat at the edge of my bed.

“So, yea I, uh, got some letters from some admirers the other day and I met them yesterday.” I explained while pulling the cover closer to my face.

“Hhmm, is that why you were not very talkative at dinner last evening?” Motoko was quick to make the likely suggestion.

I nodded several times in quick succession.

“Well, how did that go?” She smirked slightly.

“Uh, 50/50.” I mumbled

“Alright, what are you going to do next?” She asked.

“... I’m not sure.” I slowly covered my face.

“... Well, just remember. You don’t need to have all the answers right away. You have plenty of time to figure out what is best for you, and don't be afraid to used your Mom and I as a resource.” She got close to my covered face and spoke with care.

“Okay, I won’t be heading out right away, so I can drop you off at school if you want.” Motoko said as she walked out of my room.

I felt very slow this morning so far. Even though I’m wide awake with my makeup complete, It still took me several minutes longer than usual to get out of bed and prepare my uniform for school. Then from my practical crying from earlier, I had to go to the bathroom to make any adjustments to my makeup. Luckily, there wasn’t anything too messy. One of these days I'm going to forget to put on the right makeup and I'll randomly cry the same day, then my makeup will turn into a mess.

I then made my way to the dinner table to inform Motoko that I’ll need to be dropped off at school, because I took too long to get out of bed.

“Ohayō, Love!” Mom is spritely as ever in the morning.

“Ohayō, um, Motoko can you drive me to school?” I remarked somberly.

“Yes of course… But first, hey, Akane, why don’t you tell Hiromi your idea.” She replied with a grin, turning to Mom.

“Well, it’s not so much of an idea anymore, hmhm.” Mom chuckled as she gave me my plate of food.

She had a pretty big grin on her face, it looked as if she could barely contain herself. I wonder what she is going to tell me?

“What do you think about seeing a couple of games at the ZOZO Marine Stadium this season!!!” Mom flashed three baseball tickets in my face with a great display of excitement!

“Huh? What?! Really?!” My face was in shock and excitement!

“Yup, it’s true. We’ll be going to one on Sunday. So get ready!” She explained with dazzling excitement.

“Wow, what’s the reason?” I asked with curiosity as I held the baseball tickets.

“So, I don’t know if you remember, but I kinda complained a lot that we rarely saw games live. Because the drive would take forever!” Mom remarked.

“I then had the thought that we should celebrate our new life in Chiba with a family activity!” She shouted with more excitement.

“Th-That sounds great!” I could feel my smile across my face.

“In fact, being near a Stadium was one of my main reasons why I wanted to move.” Motoko remarked with a smile.

“Oh wow, this is so cool… I can’t remember the last time we’ve been to a live game.” I remarked.

“I’m not surprised, we went quite a bit when you were first born because of paternity leave. Then a couple of more times when you were 7 or 8.” Motoko mentioned.

“I don't know what to say... Thank you!” I hopped out of my chair to give my Mom and Motoko the biggest hug I can give.

And just like that, all of my worries and anxieties were waved away with some simple strips of paper. Hopefully this feeling will last for a long while!