Chapter 05:

Shortly after being done with breakfast, Maa and I made our way toward the library on the second floor. The second floor, which, with the library alone, I could tell occupied more than a fourth of its entire superficy, making it the manor's largest room.

As we approached the door behind which, for me, lay the unknown, Maa retrieved something out of her pocket, which turned out to be a golden key pendant.

"I've received this pendant from the Young Lord Family along with the letter summoning me back. This is a magic item, "she explained, kneeling, then putting the pendant on me." To access the library, all the Young Lord needs to do is put it on. "

With these words, she stood up, which gave me the weird impression that she was about to leave, which, in turn, prompted me to ask, "You're not going in Maa? … I mean to check the inside?"

Having lived two years being taken care of by this woman, I knew her well enough to know that, under the right circumstances, she would've at least checked the room herself whether or not it was a safe enough environment for me to be in.

I had the strange impression that I had been abandoned in the wilderness to fend for myself.

"No, I'm not, Young Lord. As a commoner, I am unable and not allowed to visit this room, so I'm afraid you'll have to get in on your own. " She said with a smile, which suggested to me that she knew what I was thinking, " With that said, I will, Young Lord, take my leave, I still have to get ready for tomorrow."

"Ah~ Okay. Thanks, Maa. "

She seemed to be in quite a hurry to leave, in my opinion. I was really expecting her to at least accompany me inside to make sure everything was safe in spite of the rules she earlier cited, but I guess that's it.

Placing my hand on the doorknob; I noticed the door had a keyhole, but if what Maa said earlier was correct, the keyhole was only there for the sole purpose of being an ornament.

The door opened easily, and peering through the gap, I saw nothing; the room was completely obscured by a gloomy lack of light, but instead of deterring me, it prompted me to take my first step inside the famous library. Steps which, as soon as I did, the library’s door closed behind me, leaving me in the dark, but that only for a split second. For the next instant, a bright light suddenly lit up across the room, catching me off guard, causing me to reflexively cover my eyes.

After a few seconds, as my eyes began to adjust to the surroundings, the sudden shift from darkness to bright light, went to where the light was emitting from.

Hanging from the ceiling and attached to the walls were several chandeliers, along with several wall lamps. Their bright light lit the entirety of the earlier pitch dark room that was the library.

"Beautiful," I couldn’t help but whisper, upon setting eyes on the content of the famous library.

When I was told that no one had access to the library, not even Maa or Syrus, let alone the maids, I imagined it to be a dusty room filled with books, which it wasn't, now that I've seen it with my own two eyes.

It was indeed full of books, but the room was far from being remotely dusty. Instead, it looked as polished and shiny as any other room of the manor. The floor was so clean, I could even see my reflection in it. Books were neatly stacked on their shelves.

The only two things that turned out as expected with the library were how spacious the library was and the number of books it contained.

Two long tables put together with chairs were located in the center of the room, while at either end of the room, one could find a desk along with two chairs.

I was expecting to find a large number of books, and I was not disappointed. The bookshelves, which were pinned to the four sides of the wall from floor to ceiling, gave me the strange impression of being trapped, which was exacerbated by the lack of windows in this room.

There were so many books here that I doubt I'd be able to read them all even if I spent my entire life here.

Okay, this may be an exaggeration, but the point is that there were a lot of books in this room. And I must also admit that, having spent the past 6 months reading the same book over and over, being surrounded by so many books was somewhat overwhelming.

Spending the rest of the day inside the library, I wandered through the shelves rather randomly before coming across a seemingly interesting book. I was not looking for any particular book; I was simply curious as to what kind of books were available.

After reading "Nobility and Powerhouse," I realized how little I knew about the world, myself, and everything else.

Though Maa was providing a stable and somewhat reliable resource of information, I was only told, or to be exact, fed, what she believed I, a 4 year old boy, needed to know, so that could be summarized as pretty much, not a lot and at a snail's pace. So, though being a great informer, I couldn’t just rely on her, leaving me with no other alternative but books.

Even though I'd coped with the fact that I was a baby, I was still curious about that which made me more than just a baby, for there was. I was born atypical. I was born aware of that fact, which is why I would like to know what is, was, or went wrong with.

So far, in almost four years, all I've been doing is going with the flow. I had so many questions, and so many of them were left unanswered.

"Why was I am like tha-or, to be exact, why was I like that?"

"Why was I, as a baby... aware?" For I knew from the way Maa was treating me, that this sort of thing was not normal.

There had to be something wrong with me-No, there absolutely is.

Thinking back, my language was... the one I spoke. No, the one I thought with. Was it even a language? At this point, I was not even sure if I could call it a language anymore.

I do remember being astonished at how quickly I picked up on the local tongue.

I couldn’t tell why, but I felt that there was something wrong with the way I picked it, and soon it dawned on me that, by picking up the local language, I immediately forgot the word I had previously used to define the object in question thus far. At that point, it was like by learning a new word I instantly picked it up, but in exchange I had the previous sounding of the previous one being completely obliterated from my memory

Shouldn't I, at least remember how the previous one sounded, instead of directly forgetting about it?

"Daaamn,... Even thinking about it gives me headaches."

For so long due to the headache-inducing nature of those questions, I’ve come to the temporary resolution to completely ignore their existence, but the time has come. I can’t go on like this forever. I have to at least try to find an answer to it.

So far, I’ve left those questions in suspense, blaming them on the fact that I had no way to obtain any answers in the first place. But today, I wouldn’t be so helpless.

I came to this library hoping to find something that would enlighten me in my current situation. Despite my doubts that I will find answers to all of my questions here,I still have a glimmer of hope; that I will at least find an answer to some of them.

But in the end, who knew? Maybe I'll find something, maybe I’ll find nothing, but at least, it didn’t cost anything to try.

I had a lot of questions about what had happened before that day, but I also had a lot of questions about what had happened since that day.

So many questions regarding my birth, my mother, my father, and of course, "me".

Maa told me that my father was a noble, and so, she said, were my grandparents. From what I understood of it, things were slightly complicated when it came to my mother's side of the family. So far, the only things I knew about her were her name, appearance, and the fact that she might not be a member of the nobility. Maa confirmed that my father's family were, them, part of the nobility, but upon asking about my mother, she went suspiciously silent.

I want to know.

I was curious how people, particularly nobility from this world, perceive children born of a noble and a commoner. Was it common? Or was it not?

Why was I kept away from my family like this?

I want to know.

Upon awakening that day, I knew that there must be somewhere out there, must be something out there that was missing from me, I didn’t and still don’t know what it is, but I want to know.