44.i A Diamond Body

~ Bodhi ~

“Sudden Death! In the first round?” Ham Song shrieked. “How in the hell is that fair!”

“It isn’t,” Bodhi said, calm despite the bad news. It was exactly as they feared. They were back to chewing on their thumbnails as they watched the Old Master Laozhi bow to the astonished crowd after declaring the decision. Then with a sweep of his massive sleeves, the old sun clone returned to his seat among the other judges.

Ham Song released one disapproving snort after the other. Over the boos and grumbles of the crowds, he asked, “So monk, what do you plan to do if things don’t go well in this round?”

It would seem, Dear Traveler, that Ham Song was coming around on the idea of cheating.

“Nothing,” Bodhi said, sinking out of the crouch and relaxing into the seat. Though they had stopped biting their nails, all of that suppressed nervous energy went into bouncing their leg.

The pig’s bristly eyebrows practically merged in disagreement. “You know, one word answers like that can make you sound wise in the moment, but now it’s just getting on my nerves. You’ve got to have a better solution than that.”

Bodhi folded their hands over their lap and looked up at the band of sky visible through the opening in the stadium ceiling.

“Do you remember when I threw that punch at Ritsu on Ripe Peach Mountain and he didn’t flinch? You tried to skewer me afterwards if you recall.”

Ham Song gave a noncommittal grunt. He remembered.

Bodhi went on. “Well, my hunch hasn’t gone away. Ritsu has incredible reflexes. This part of the competition doesn’t require any skill other than to not get drop-kicked off the platform. That and staying very clear of Sun Tie Quan. The guy clearly has it out for him.”

Ham Song snorted. “If you’re so confident then why can’t you sit still?”

Bodhi briefly closed their eyes. “Because usually in these situations, I have something to calm my nerves.”

“Can you shut up? They’re going over the rules!”

“It’s quite simple, Dan. The contenders have to rely on their staff in order to stay on the platform. Whether that means using it as a form of defense or offense is completely up to them. The point is to favor the staff instead of relying on personal brute strength or some flashy power.”

“Okay, okay. I think I get it, Chow. So contestants can have a more defensive method where they might, say, use their staff to stay rooted to one spot on the platform. Or they could go full attack mode and knock off as many other challengers as they can. Is that right?”

“That’s correct, Dan.”

“And If I’m not mistaken, Chow, the judges have decided on drawing the line at eight contenders to move on to the remaining trials. We have close to a hundred sun clones out here today. So that’s going to be a pretty big cut.”

“That’s an understatement, Dan. For more than ninety percent of the contenders you see here today, this will be their last time standing on the grounds of the Divine Cave of Three Stars.”

“Sweet immortal peaches, seems kind of sad when you put it like that.”

While the sportscasters prattled on, the edges of the arena floor shifted and folded before lifting up into the sky. Both Bodhi and Ham Song swallowed lumps in their throats as they watched their benevolent monkey king fumble with his jade earring. Other clones warmed up their bodies. Quarterstaves twirled in preparation.

“He can’t even get the damn thing out of his ear. We’re so done for,” Ham Song despaired.

The sound of the platform cranking higher towards the ceiling was overtaken by the panicked, uneven breathing of Sun Seven bursting into the aisle.

“Sifu! Sifu! We are in some very deep tiger shit!”

Bodhi tore their gaze away from the elevated platform and did their best to remain calm.

“Where’s my ice?”

As if he hadn’t heard them, Seven barked, “Sifu, listen up!”

The sun clone ungracefully climbed over Ham Song to get closer to Bodhi with the intel he’d gathered.

“It’s about Sun Tie Quan. He can call and send his quarterstaff wherever he wants it to go.”

Ham Song snuffed, “Okay, so he has a gimmick. What’s so bad about that?”

“It’s bad,” Bodhi whispered. “With a technique like that, you can make the most unremarkable wooden staff become your own personal shot cannon.”

“His accuracy is off the charts,” Seven added, wiping the sweat from his forehead. As if things weren’t bad enough.

Bodhi felt like they were sweating bullets too. Only eight slots left and no time to think! They had to do something before this whole thing started.

The monk inhaled sharply before they shot to their feet and vaulted their body over the seats and into the main aisle.

Racing to the edge of the spectators section, they let all of that saved up air go as they shouted, “Sun Ritsu!”

Once they got Ritsu’s attention, Bodhi bellowed, “Whatever you do, don’t tense up! Relax your muscles! If you get hit, just roll with it!”

Ritsu stared down at Bodhi with wide eyes, clearly not ready for what was about to happen. Still, he affirmed with a nod before taking a step back away from the edge of the platform.

There was nothing else Bodhi could do. They would just have to pray that Ritsu survived the trial — this impossible trial.