Goodbye, My Key

 “Right, sorry. Tsukimi, this is Oliver. We met him at a carnival; he was a performing magician,” I explain.

“Never heard of me, my dear?” he gave Tsukimi a seductive smirk.

“Not a day in my life,” she shook her head, keeping a cold stare on her face.

“Ah- anyways. Oliver, this is Tsukimi; we met her at the ball,” I continued.

“The ball… the ball… oh! I heard a couple got kicked out for assaulting someone. I don’t suppose that’s…”

Lili and I turned our heads, embarrassed.

“Huh? I was just joking!” Oli laughed, “That was seriously you guys? Wow!” he wiped a tear from his eye before continuing to laugh.

“Oliver… I-” Tsukimi began before being interrupted.

“You can call me Oli~” he responded, pulling a rock out of his pocket before placing his hand over it with a clap. When he uncovered his hand, a bouquet of black roses appeared.

“They reminded me of you,” he winked, handing the bouquet to Tsukimi.

“Oh, thank you. Oliver’s fine, though,” she coldly rejected his advances, “I just wanted to say thank you for being kind to my friends; I hope we can become friends too.”

“I’m fine with being friends; friends can blossom into something more, after all,” he flirted.

“People like you interest me, Oliver. People that want nothing more than to add spice to life… am I wrong about you?” she asked curiously, once again ignoring his advances.

“Not at all. That desire of mine landed me on this side, after all.”

“Oh?” Our curiosity was piqued, wanting to learn more about Oli.

“Life is a boring thing. That’s why I spent my life doing everything I could to stay in an adrenaline rush. My final breath was spent doing my dream trick, and I didn’t mind. At least I went out with a bang!”

“Self-sabotaging behavior in favor of a fun life,” Lili murmured under her breath before glancing at me, a look of concern on her face, “Yoichi, was it?” she asked me.

I nodded, “That sort of thing got him in massive trouble; you should be careful.”

“What’s the fun in that? I want to live the life I never experienced as a child, even if it hurts me,” he said casually.

“You have an eternity to do those things.”

“Aaaaand! I have an eternity to fix the things it causes.”

“But-”

“You’re not winning this one, Haruki,” he gave me a sly smile.

“Fine, I don’t care,” I sat back, arms folded as the girls didn’t bother interjecting, “Better not ask me for help once things go south.”

Oli chuckled, “Are you seriously mad, Haruki? It’s not a big deal.”

“It’s gonna be a big deal soon enough,” unintentionally, my voice became much more aggressive.

“Haru… let’s just go to bed, okay?” Lili put her hand on my back, concerned, “I think all your stress has finally caught up to you.”

“That’s not fucking true,” I swatted her hand away, “I’ve just seen firsthand what that kind of lifestyle can do to a person!” I shouted.

Glancing at everyone’s concerned faces, I quickly turned away and slammed the door behind me. Maybe Lili was right; everything became too much, and being reminded of Yoichi was the final straw. I’m worried that I might’ve hurt someone, or maybe they don’t want to see me at all right now.

I wrapped myself in my blanket and shielded myself from the world that night.
—
After Haru shouted at me, I couldn’t stand to sleep in the same room as him that night. Not because I was mad at him, but because I felt guilty for doing something wrong. His reaction was my fault; maybe he wouldn’t have gotten upset if I never existed, to begin with.

As I stared at his face from the other side of the room, I felt the urge to leave, if only for a second. I adjusted my nightgown as I walked through the halls, glancing at a mirror. My hair grows longer with each passing week; maybe I should get it cut soon. The opening of the front door disrupts my thoughts. Hurrying my steps, I stop in the living room, prepared to attack whatever might’ve broken in.

“Lili?” I heard a female voice call my name; standing at the door was Tsukimi.

“Tsukimi, are you leaving?” I asked, letting out a sigh of relief.

“I’m sorry… you weren’t supposed to see this.”

“Hm?”

“I have something I have to do now. I have no use for anything else anymore,” she began, grabbing my hands gently, “I wouldn’t have a purpose if it weren’t for you; you really are my key.”

She reaches into her pocket, grabbing the hairclip I gave her before gently placing it in my hands, “You can have this back.”

My lip quivered, shaking my head, unable to believe what she told me, “N-No, I want you to have it.”

“It’s something to remember me by, Lili.”

“What do you mean…?” I mutter, secretly knowing exactly what she meant.

“For people like me, once we find something to dedicate our life to, we see no purpose for anything else. I’m sorry, truly… I don’t know when you’ll hear from me again; this is farewell.”

She wrapped her arms around my trembling shoulders before kissing me on the forehead.

“If I never came out here…” my voice trembled, tears filling my eyes, “Would you have just left without saying goodbye?”

“I didn’t want to see you cry.”

“That’s so… so… selfish…” I sobbed, letting myself drown in her embrace.

I heard a sniffle, “I’m sorry, Lili. I’m really sorry.”

“If you want to leave so bad, then leave!” I shouted, pointing at the door aggressively. Tsukimi pulled back from me, a single tear streaming down her cheek. She took a deep breath before turning around and walking out the door.

Dropping to my knees, my sobs muffled into my sleeves. I threw the hairclip at the wall, hearing it rattle and clank when it fell to the ground. I couldn’t help but wonder if I’d been used just to lend a helping hand. I want to be mad, I want to hate her, but I can’t. I can’t help but feel happy that I could be useful to her.
—
That morning felt hazy. A wave of tension still sat in the air when I unveiled myself to the world again. Lili was staring at the ground blankly, not making a sound, tears staining her cheeks.

“Lili… if you don’t want to talk to me, I understand, but-” I began to apologize before being interrupted.

“Haru…” she groaned, “I want to be held.”

Following her words, I climbed into her bed and held her face close to my chest, running my hands through her hair.

“Tsukimi left last night,” she began, “I was stupid to think we weren’t alone in this world.”

“She really did care about you, though,” I rested my cheek on her head, holding her tighter.

“Then why did she leave?” she looked up at me, a pained expression on her face.

“Sometimes people have to leave, even if it hurts someone else in the process. We’ll hear from her again, though, I’m sure of it,” I said, trying to comfort her, “Even if we don’t, I’ll always be here.”

“Promise?” she extended her pinky in front of her.

“Promise,” in response, I wrapped my pinky around hers.

We spent the morning finding comfort in each other’s arms, and when the afternoon hit, Oli was already gone, leaving us back at square one and with a mountain of plushies we had no room for. The days after that repeated themselves until the 6th month anniversary of our arrival came.