vs. Slimes

I amble along the path to town. I’m surrounded by withered trees, underbrush, and endless sand.

Beyond the setting sun is the shadow of a long, ominous tower. It’s so tall its as though its a rift in the sky.

“Wonder what that could be…”

Another shadow quickly approaches the skyline; this one a bouncing dot. Thud-thud-thud-thud - the galloping figure bounds into focus and the rider’s features come into view.

It’s a girl whose expression is confident-bordering-on-arrogant, her hair in one long braid. She halts her horse, but does not dismount from it.

“Can I ask you a question, traveler?” She asks. Her voice is sweet, yet double-edged and poisonous, like a serpent’s kiss.

“What if I say no?”

She guides the horse so it plods in a circle around me. Her greaves go up to her thighs but no further, cresting at a diamond tattoo.

“Ahahaha! Hahahaha! Ha! Ha!” She laughs. “Funny! You’re cute, and you’re funny! I bet you’re strong too.”

This girl seriously rubs me the wrong way. But I don’t think she’s going to rob me; if she were hostile, her stats would have popped up by now.

As if she had read my mind, she continues:

“I’m not asking you for money or anything like that. I just want to know, was there a man with big arms on that train? A passenger, an employee, anyone like that..? And a blonde haired-girl…?”

“There was a bandit named Max, though I don’t know about the girl. You a bounty hunter?”

“AHAHAHAHAHAHA! THAT’S RIGHT! YOU GUESSED IT RIGHT! I HUNT ALLLL THE BADDIES DOWN.”

-Okay, she’s definitely not a bounty hunter. But I can say that she’s a suspicious person for sure.

I grasp her horse’s reins before she can gallop off.

“I answered your question.” I say. “So wouldn’t it be fair for you to answer one of mine?”

“Be my guest.” She shrugs.

“What’s that tower on the horizon?”

“That, my friend... is the Final Tower! You know that the Diamond Syndicate is the largest gang in all of Esterraria, right?”

“I do. I’ve been introduced to one of their members rather forcefully.”

“Good! Then you'll know there’s four great bandits in the Syndicate. One is the ‘right eye’, one is the ‘right arm’...and there's the ‘right leg’ too!” - she dismounts and comes close; she smells like horse-hair and salt.

Her eyes flicker, and she suddenly moves - but rather than attack, she steps back and points behind her.

“...and the bandit in that tower is the ‘Head’, the Bandit Lord! Every criminal in this continent is loyal to him.”

“What level must I be to kill him?”

“Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!” She laughs. “Oh… you’re serious… that’s even funnier!”

She kicks me. 1 damage! SHIELD BREAK!

Giselle | Level 70 B????? ????

Shld: 700/700 | Str: 60+10  | Agi: 90+20 | Def: 60 | AP: 80/80

*Equipped: Slimming Armor, Knives x5, Phoenix Potion x2

There’s a glimpse of her stat window, and she jumps back, greaves skidding, as she catches a glimpse of mine.

Maru | Level 0 Journeyman

“Seriously? Level 0? I didn’t know stats went that low… you’ll never accomplish it!”

Attacking a stranger just to see their stats; how audacious! Since she’s at such a high level there must be only a few people that she fears.

I brush myself off as I stand. Nothing’s hurt or bruised, except for my pride. Giselle’s words have dripped with insincerity since she bounded into my path. If I could fight her and win, I would. But as is…

“Ma’am, just tell me give me a number. A humble low-level zero such as I needs the guidance of a wise, mature level seventy heroic master orator as you.”

Her title’s hidden, so I just call her something random that seems to fit her. 

“Ha! Ha! Of course a BOUNTY HNTR can’t resist a request like that! Listen closely… the ‘right eye’, the ‘right leg’, and the ‘right arm’ of the Lord are human, but our ‘Head’ in the North Tower is… something else.” She slides her hand on each part of her body in turn.

“Even level 100 may not be enough. Someone with the ‘Scepter’ or the ‘Golden Crown’ might be able to do it, but the Bandit Lord has the former and is hunting for the latter, so you might be out of luck.”

“Level 100. Very well; I’ll reach level 100, find that so-called ‘crown’, and slay him," I reply. 

Giselle smirks, silent. I continue:

“I doubt I’ll kill him tomorrow, or even that I’ll kill him in a year. But given ten years, that will should be more than enough.” 

She shrugs, and mounts her horse. It whinnies as she tightens herself around the saddle.

“Perhaps I’ll even kill you, bandit boss.”

The smile slips off her face. “How long did you know?”

“I suspected when you showed your diamond tattoo, but when stats it confirmed it.”

“What if I kill you first, you arrogant fool?” Giselle sweeps a throwing-knife from her sunworn coat.

“You’re sweating and you smell like horse. You must have been riding for a while. You’re in a hurry, so you won’t waste time on me.”

She breathes heavily, and her face is red - redder than it would be if it was from the blazing sun alone. Despite my not having lifted a finger, she seems absolutely defeated.

“What’s your name?”

“Tanaka Maru.”

“Make no mistake, Tanaka Maru…! The reason I, Giselle, the ‘right leg’ of the Bandit Lord have spared you today isn’t because I’m in a rush to join forces with Max!

It is because the loot and experience to be gained from slaying a level 0 would be worth less than a slime’s!”

She spurs her horse and gallops away.

**********************************************************************

I wish I had a horse; a two-hour walk is longer than you might think, especially under a withering sun.

The desert is a monotonous sea of sand and dry plants as well. The only interesting thing I notice isn’t from the desert at all; it’s from my stats. I regenerated my shld points after what I would guess to be five or ten minutes.

Maru | Level 0 Journeyman 

Shld 1/1 | Str: 0 | Def: 0 | Agi: 0 | AP: 1/1

Exp: 0/20

There’s nothing to mark the time except the sun; but I put one foot in front of the other, and the box-roofed buildings of Kameleon soon come into sight. The desert’s so flat that the skyline appears while I’m still a few miles out.

“Just a little more…”

As I approach town, my surroundings change ever so slightly. Scruff and dried underbrush is replaced with florid cacti, their flowers a shocking neon blue.

The flowers are shaped like wobbling spheres; and I can see my perplexed reflection in their strange bodies.

One of them splats onto the ground and reconstitutes itself into an orb the size of a beachball.

Name: Slime | Level 1 Ooze Monster

Shld: 2/2 | Atk: 1 | Def: 1 | Agi: 0 | AP: 0/0

It’s no flower; it’s the ‘ol amorphous blob o’ goo, the exp-farm for low-level adventurers everywhere. It must have attached to the desert cacti to preserve its moisture.

It rolls itself towards me and makes an odd chirruping sound.

“Are you trying to intimidate me?”

It zigzags haphazardly, like a zooming kitten, and lays to rest at my feet

I thwack it experimentally.

1 damage!

COMBAT ART: OOZE HEAL

[A slime’s innate ability; instantly heal 1 damage whenever damage is taken. No AP cost]

1 SP restored!

It nudges me.

1 damage to Maru! SHIELD BREAK! DANGER!

“Seriously…?”

That combat art is just cheap! Since all I can do is chip at it with scratch damage, and the slime heals 1 health with every blow, this slime is basically invincible.

There’s one tactic that remains to me. It has immense destructive power so I don’t want to use it.

That tactic is called “running away”, and it’d totally demolish my self-esteem. At least Zorro’s not going to be here to see me run… though didn’t she say there weren’t going to be any mobs? Lies!

I make my escape, and the slime chirrups and follows. However, each of its roll is shorter than a single one of my strides.

“Silly slime. How can you win a footrace without any feet?”

“Chirrup!”

It whirls and accelerates. I’m forced off the winding path into the wild as it gives chase.

The sand here is much darker than the brighter grains I had tread on before. It’s damp too. Did the slime corral me into quicksand?

I tap my foot on the surface but it holds my weight. Since the damp sand is tough and compact rather than loose and gravely, I can actually walk faster and gain speed.

The slime chirrups again and there’s an ominous sloshing.

Water oozes up and out from the damp earth and forms a small slime army. “Chirp!” “Chirp”! “Chirrup!” “Chirrup!”

I step backwards, and my shoe falls onto another blob’s head.

“CHIRRUP!”

I’m surrounded. By level 1 slimes.

I thwack one. But of course…

1 damage!

COMBAT ART: OOZE HEAL

[A slime’s innate ability; instantly heal 1 damage whenever damage is taken. No AP cost]

1 SP restored!

They’re all immune. Great. Just great. I’ve confronted two bandit bosses, but my journey’s going to be drowned by adventurer fodder.

I'd pray, but with the stats that I have, whatever isekai god there is must have forsaken me.

Maru | Level 0 Journeyman

Shld 1/1 | Str: 0 | Def: 0 | Agi: 0 | AP: 1/1

Exp: 0/20

Come to think of it, if I have 1AP, I must have some combat arts of my own, right…?

I mentally “tap” on the AP stat and I witness another box expand. Praise be!

COMBAT ARTS

[BREATHING] [LOCKED] [LOCKED] [LOCKED]

Breathing?

BREATHING

[An mouthbreather’s innate ability to breathe air in any situation. Costs 1AP].

I inhale: “HELP!!!!!!!”

With my “breathing” combat art my shout is louder and more oxygenated than it would have been otherwise, but that’s it. At this point my self-esteem isn’t just up in flames, it’s cremated into ash.

“Where did it all go wrong..?”

“Chirrup! Chirrup! Chirrup!”

The slimes encircle me, and they ooze forward. A panic seizes me, makes my heart thrum, and causes useless thoughts to run quick in my brain.

As the slime’s freezing body presses against my skin, I reach a cool clarity. An beaten-down office-worker lacks a warrior’s heart, no matter how he might daydream otherwise. The me in my imagination and my ‘real’ personality are as far apart as my level’s and Zorro’s.

I ran from the slime because I thought it would kill me. I failed to strike directly against Giselle because I was afraid.

And when I fought Max on the train, that wasn’t bravery either. I was scared that the peacefully-sleeping Zorro would be hurt and that spurred me to try to sacrifice myself for her sake. I never sincerely thought I’d beat him.

My first true step into this world was gaining the will to fight. My second step must be finding my resolve to win.

Instead of thinking about how to avoid defeat, I’ll think about how to attain victory.