Never Enough

A Chance of Happiness Chapter 26: Never Enough

No matter how hard we try, no matter how much we wish it were so, nothing ever lasts forever. Memories can come and go the second they are made, dreams can be forgotten the second you wake up. Relationships are no different. One moment it can feel like nothing can go wrong, surrounded by the people you care about. The next, you realize all too late that just like the memories and dreams, they all eventually… disappear.

Vernon laid on the floor of his junior high’s performing arts center, surrounded by several scattered papers. The stage lights dimly covered him as a series of applause ensued as Vernon got off the ground and took a bow. The lights brightened to reveal the crowd, clapping and cheering. He scanned the audience, but what he was looking for… or rather, who he was looking for… wasn’t there.

Vernon looked down, seeing the papers scattered beneath his feet. “What will it take… to make you smile again?”

Vernon sat in the dressing room, scanning his phone for messages before making a call. The dial tone rang as Vernon held his phone up to his head. No more than two rings later, a voice responded.

“Hello?”

“Um, hello… it’s Vernon.”

“Ah, how are you Vernon?”

“Good… how are you, Mr. Rento?”

“Fine, thank you. And call me Daijiro, please, no need for that.”

“... Sure.” Vernon held the phone away from his ear for a moment. “How… is Jin doing?”

“He’s…” Daijiro paused. “... still not quite ready yet. Sorry he missed your performance, I remember him telling me it was today.”

“D-Don’t be…”

“Thank you for checking up on him. It makes me happy to know he has a friend like you.”

Vernon and Daijiro talked on the phone for a few more minutes before saying their goodbyes. As Vernon hung up, he threw his phone, sending it flying against the wall, cracking off a large piece of the screen. He put his elbow on the table and put his hand on his forehead.

“A friend like me…” Vernon scoffed, his expression showing signs of frustration. “What kind of friend am I… when I haven’t been able to do a single thing for him?”

The door to the dressing room opened as Ayaka walked in, noticing Vernon at the table and his phone on the floor near the doorway. She picked up his phone, examining it as she went over to him. As she got closer she could see parts of his expression that weren’t covered by his hand.

“What’s wrong? Are you alright?”

Vernon rubbed his eyes and scratched the side of his head. “No… it just… wasn’t good enough.”

“What? But your performance–”

“It wasn’t good enough! I… wasn’t good enough…”

“That’s not true! You did great out there! Why would you–”

“I have somewhere to be.”

“Huh? But…”

“I need to practice.” Vernon quickly packed up his things and exited the dressing room, leaving Ayaka behind.

Ayaka gave a depressed expression as Vernon left, her fists tightening. “But you… were so amazing…”

“It’s not enough… it has to be better than this…” Vernon thought to himself as he sorted through a stack of scripts.

“Hey Ichihara, it’s late, we’re heading out. Make sure to close up when you’re finished.” A boy called as he and two other boys left the performing arts center.

Vernon continued to sort through the scripts. The sound of the door slamming behind the boys broke his focus as he looked towards the door and the clock beside it.

“It’s late…”

Vernon held a script in his hands as he practiced the lines over and over, constantly restarting as he began to lose his voice. He grabbed his water bottle from his bag and sat against the wall, sweat beginning to run down his face. His breaths became increasingly heavy as he laid his head back against the wall.

A couple of his clubmates peered into the room to see him against the wall, worried expressions on their faces.

Ayaka left her classroom, and a couple of Vernon’s clubmates followed her as she left.

“Excuse me, Fujimura-san, right?” One of the clubmates called out to Ayaka in the hallway.

“Hm? Yes? Did you need something?”

“Um… well… you and Ichihara-senpai are close… right?”

Ayaka panicked, looking a bit flustered. “W-Well yes… we know eachother… a fair amount…” Ayaka paused, noticing the worried expressions on their faces. “What is it?”

“It’s just… he’s been overworking himself. We always see him at the club early and staying late even after everyone’s already left. He just seems… tired…”

The second clubmate raised her hand. “We were hoping… since you two were close… that you could talk to him.”

Vernon left his classroom and began heading towards the clubroom like usual as a hand slapped him on the back.

“Ow! What the–” Vernon looked up to see Ayaka standing in front of him.

“Yo!” Ayaka waved with a playful expression on her face.

“Was the slap necessary?”

“Absolutely.”

“Did you need something? I have somewhere to be.” Vernon sighed.

“Pssh, your club can wait. We need to talk about the festival! We haven’t talked about when we’re meeting up.”

Vernon frowned. “I can’t go this year. Too many things to do.”

“Oh c’mon, it’s just one–”

“I said I’m busy!” Vernon yelled, looking away to not make eye contact as Ayaka’s expression quickly turned to shock. “I just… don’t have the time…” he sighed as he walked past Ayaka.

“But… we’ve… always gone together…” Ayaka turned and began to reach out.

“Then I’m sure you can manage going by yourself.” Vernon replied, stopping Ayaka from moving any further.

It only took Vernon a few steps to process what he’d just said, but by the time he turned around, Ayaka was already gone.

Ayaka stood outside the classroom, looking in through the window at the two boys sitting in the corner of the room, seemingly in a daze.

“Fujimura-san?” a voice called out to her, but she didn’t hear it. “Fujimura-san?” the voice called again, finally getting her attention.

“Oh, sorry Sakurai-san.” Ayaka apologized, shaking some sense into herself. “What was the question?”

“N-Nothing… you just seemed… lost in thought.”

“Was I?” Ayaka questioned, beginning to space out again.

Midori nodded. “Do you know those two boys?”

“You seriously hang out with him? Isn’t he friends with that delinquent?”

“It’s too bad really. He’d probably be more popular if he didn’t hang around him.”

“He’s probably such a bad influence on him too. Hopefully he doesn’t turn out like him.”

“Did you need something? I have somewhere to be.”

Can’t it wait? We haven’t really talked lately… couldn’t you tell me what’s been bothering you?

That’s what I should have told him.

“I said I’m busy!”

Then let me help!

That’s what I should have done.

“Then I’m sure you can manage going by yourself.”

But it’s not the same… without you…

That’s what… I needed to say.

“Fujimura-san? You spaced out again.” Midori gave her a concerned expression.

“Right, sorry.”

“So, do you know those two boys?”

Ayaka looked back at the two boys in the corner of the room with a conflicted expression. “No… I don’t…” Ayaka replied as she began to think to herself. “Not anymore anyways.”