Peace

There is comfort in getting used to things, to someone's absence and to someone's presence.

"Come on." I turned back to look at Hikari. He was left a few steps behind me, staring at the sky. "Don't drag it on for any later. We should buy everything at once." He nodded, his eyes still trailing an abstract cloud. He always did that.

We started walking, with him to my left.

Many things changed since my sister died. The most drastic had to be, meeting Hikari. He turned my world upside down. Because he was always there, I had to keep doing something. I had to keep thinking and making plans. He kept me busy.

"Your name suits you." I had once told him, and he didn't agree with me. In fact, he totally denied it. He told me how someone had made fun of his name because he was just the opposite of what it meant. I felt like beating up whoever that was. "It doesn't matter what others say, I think it suits you." He still didn't believe me.

We walked to a shop Kobayashi had suggested. A wall was covered in small packets with different pictures or flowers. Those were seeds. Rest, I just handed the employee the paper I had written into, so there wouldn't be any mistakes.

She mumbled something about the seeds, "Eh, Morning glory? You kids are doing some project...?" but neither I nor Hikari were paying attention, so she stopped talking. "That would be all?" She asked as we both said 'yes' at the same time. I quickly paid and went outside the shop. "I also had money," Hikari said abruptly, rushing to open his bag, probably looking for his wallet. I handed him the things we bought instead. "You will pay next time."

"Why are you in a hurry?" Hikari asked, shifting the bags to his dominant hand.

"Ah, sorry, did you want to look at the shop some more?"

"No." He replied and didn't say anything else. These days, I felt on the edge around him. I wanted to know what he was thinking, or if I upset him in any way. So when he didn't give clear responses, I couldn't just tell myself 'whatever' and move on like I used to.

I started thinking of the next thing to say, but he did it first. "I like wasting time like this. If you do everything so quickly, I'll have to go home very soon, so you should do such things slowly. When you're satisfied with what you know about Saeko, I'll miss this."

"I..." I couldn't find the right words. "I won't be satisfied so quickly. There's so many questions still unanswered." I'll miss this too.

"Souma," He paused and pointed towards a children's park we had come across. "Let's sit there for a while." We got inside and sat on a bench. Hikari had tried to sit on the swing but they looked too small for us to use without breaking. We sat just close enough to hear each other's breaths, and our fingers stayed centimetres apart.

"You don't hate me, right?" He asked in a quiet voice and rested his head on my shoulder. It was as if he was used to doing that whenever we were left alone.

"I don't hate you." I let our little fingers touch and curl around the other's. "Why would you say that?"

"No special reason. I think I want to keep hearing it, or else I'll forget it." He said.

"Okay, then I'll keep saying it."

We sat there for a while, in that same position. Every time we heard footsteps approaching, Hikari would lift up his head, and as soon as the pedestrian walked away, he'd lean in again. He did the same thing four times until a little kid came rushing into the park. We could hear his Mom announcing from far away, "We have to go home, don't take too long!" and she continued to chat with another woman. They slowly came inside the park and stared at me and Hikari.

We were sitting on the only bench in the park.

"Let's go." Hikari whispered and got up. I stood up and followed him. The two women nodded at me politely and I nodded back in response. Then, they sat in our spot.

When we were out of their sight, Hikari sighed loudly. He massaged his forehead and pushed the bag towards me, indicating I carry it. "You can't hold it anymore?" I asked and he made an annoyed noise.

"It's ruining my balance. And I feel as if I'll keep it somewhere and forget it there. Do you want that to happen?" He asked.

"Fine, fine, I'll take it." I took the bag from his hand.

By then, the sky was orange and the sun was about to set. Sometimes, Hikari looked as if he was terminally ill. He kept doing the most stupid things, but his face was pale and his wrists looked as if there wasn't any blood flowing in him. Rather than getting a tan in the sun, his face would just turn red. His hair was dark, like a crow and his eyes were a very common shade of dark brown.

We walked side by side like we usually did. We didn't have to talk unless there was a third presence beside us. We could sit around each other and do our own thing, and it'd still be relaxing.

"You know, Hikari," I got his attention on me. "It's not just because of Saeko anymore, I like being around you."

The next day, we started with the digging after school. Yamato and I did most of the hard work, Hikari sipped on a juice bag and stood next to Kobayashi. Well, he did try helping out, but he kept doing it wrong. Morning glory grew with vines, so we had to put up sticks for the plant to climb. I still don't know how he kept breaking the sticks.

"Let them do it." Kobayashi awkwardly told him. "Or else we'd have to buy more sticks."

A while later, Mr.Sato came by to see the work. He took a picture of the 'garden' on his phone, which took him a while to figure out. Fujiwara-senpai came by too, but she mostly only talked to Yamato. And the Class Prez seemed to have made up with Hikari.

It is fun to laugh about pointless things. It's relieving to repeat mundane silly activities.

"I don't have any worries when I'm around you."