Twisted fate

“-it.”

The moment I finished that word, I was no longer in my car. Instead, I was standing on what seemed to be a moss-riddled platform made of stone. Since I’m pretty sure I just got into an accident, I took a moment to count my limbs to make sure nothing was missing. Fortunately, every piece was right where it was supposed to be.

Next, I bit my tongue to confirm if I could still feel pain. And I did, so I must be alive, no doubt about that. After that, I looked around. The dark sky was extremely clouded, the whole area was foggy and as far as the naked eye could see, the floor seemed to stretch far beyond the horizon. I took a whiff of the air, exhaled and thought that this couldn't be hell, but nor could it be heaven. It was just nothing, void of any presence.

Until a resonating sound from above made it clear that something was descending upon this platform at incredible speed. It came as a whistling sound at first and then, as it slowly grew, it transformed into a resounding roar.

It didn’t reassure me one bit. This weird setting looked too much like a boss fight encounter about to happen and I was the player in the middle of an unskippable cutscene. Whatever was going to land was going to be bad news.

As tension grew and I waited, the mystery in question finally pierced the clouds and landed onto a heavily lit area — there was no orchestral boss music, so that was a relief.

Two huge grey feet, befitted a giant, stood before me. They were really crusty, to the point where it looked like chunks of rock were forming all over them, like barnacles. It looked very scratchable, similar to calcium crystals growing on dry walls. Surprisingly, it didn’t emit any gag-worthy odors, or any odors at all for that matter.

From all this description, I was willing to bet it was some kind golem.

I nervously raised my head to look for the head of these feet. A distant pair of blurry lights through the clouds seemed to gaze down at me. Imagine squinting at your alarm clock in the morning, then multiply the confusion by ten. I strained to make out its features as something spoke from above, the voice croaking like a rusty gate.

“Welcome to the afterlife, Sogen Inoue. You’ve shuffled off the mortal coil. But worry not, every living creature is given a second chance at a more fruitful life by one of us cosmic custodians. And you are no exception. Today, you’ll be whisked away to another world, equipped with a special skill of your choosing. Consider this the next part of your journey.”

I blinked, bewildered and confused. “A skill? Like communication or leadership?”

It let out a sound that might’ve been a chuckle or rumbling mountains. “More like something from a game, like shooting fireballs. Or, say, the power to communicate with wild beasts.”

A sense of relief washed down on my mind. At least I’m not being punished for my poor life choices.

But then it continued speaking, each word continued to slowly scatter the clouds.

“However, I must inform you of a minor hitch.” Uh-oh.

“In your past life, you ended someone’s life prematurely. This leads us to the ‘Shitty Skills’ bowl.”

My heart sank. “Shitty Skills bowl?”

It gestured with a hand that could’ve wiped out a city block in a single swat. Pointing to an area where it originally had nothing, but now has a floating bowl with the label in question.

“Yes, indeed. Otherwise also known as the ‘Oops, I took a life’ bowl.”

"So, I get stuck with a terrible skill?"

The giant shrugged — or what seemed like a seismic event in celestial terms. "Not terrible, per se. Just… quirky."

As it beckoned me to the bowl, I walked to it and squinted to see the coin-sized glimmers within.

“Choose a coin, any coin. Flip it, and let fate guide you.”

I leaned forward, peering inside the bowl. There were so many bronze coins inside and each of them was engraved with a small inscription too small to read at this distance. I felt a bit nervous, but at the same time, my gambling spirit was being kindled by all these white glints.

Next thing I know, I reached in, the coins' cool and metallic features under my fingers. They clinked like a hundred dropped keys. I pulled one out and turned it over in my palm. One side was engraved with the words “You are a dog” and on the other, I found “Rat man”.

“So… I get to be either a dog or a rat man?” I sighed with my face downcast, resigned to my fate.

The giant nodded, and I heard a snicker coming its way. “Indeed. Now, flip it and embrace your destiny.”

In that very moment, I prayed deep inside my heart that I won’t be stuck being a dog.

Let’s think about it for a second. If I were a dog and I arrived in a starving neighborhood, I could get trapped and eaten. Moreover, I really didn't want to be kept as a pet, let alone be a viable food source during tough times. But if I were a Rat man, I might be able to charm or distract people from harming me with my human intellect and then make a run for it.

At least if I were a Rat man, I could still retain the part of me that’s still a man. Surely, it'll be like being a werewolf. To be honest, both these options don’t sound promising, but if I had to choose, I’d rather keep a minimum of freedom, hence why I’m begging to get the latter skill.

I tossed the coin into the air, my heart racing with a mixture of excitement and a dash of apprehension. The coin spun like a mini-planet, catching the blurry light of the giant’s gaze. And then I grabbed it mid-fall to let it rest on the back of my left hand.

I lifted my hand to reveal the destiny’s calling — “You are a dog.”

After learning the result, I pursed my lips to try to prevent the tears from falling. And it worked. I’ve got to give credit where credit is due; all that abuse my dad gave me probably toughened me up hardcore.

But, while holding my emotion, my body’s mechanic bubbled up a laugh deep inside me to hide the pain. I couldn’t help it; the absurdity of it all was just too much. 

“A dog? Seriously?”

“I wouldn't sweat it if I was you. The engraving probably got lost in translation. It’s most likely a figure of speech where you can freely use the abilities of dogs.”

“What do you mean by probably?” I frowned with an upside-down smile, raising my eyebrows in confusion.

“I don’t know the details, but it's probably not as bad as it sounds. Think about it, you don’t have to pay taxes and have no responsibilities. It can be quite liberating. Who knows?” The giant's voice rumbled with amusement.

Hearing that gave me a small ray of hope for the future ahead.

“Now then, I have another dead to attend to. Time to begin your new adventure, little one. Don’t forget to wag your tail.” The giant’s eyes seemed to twinkle, and it nodded toward a hole with a swirling portal in it.

The 2 dimensional hole appeared out of thin air, defying physics.

Mentally exhausted, I trudged to the portal only to realise it was too small for me to fit, but perfect for a dog to enter. I couldn’t even bother to get my dander up, I was sick of this place.

In the end, I just embraced my fate so I can get out of here. Surprise surprise, becoming a dog was quite simple; I just expressed my desire and poof, I am now a dog. To be more specific, I thought of the first dog breed that came to mind and now I am a pit bull. This is part of me now.

I hope I can transform back into a human.

With a new sense of despair, I stepped toward the portal, ready to embrace my new life as a person with mysterious dog powers. As my muzzle passed through, I could've sworn I heard the faint sound of lips parting into a smile behind me.