Chapter 16:

Love Experts

Mismatch Romance


Dachi: So Kazu r u going help ٩(๑❛ᴗ❛๑)۶
Dachi: KAZU Park
Dachi:KAZU parrrrrrrrrk
Me: It’s Sunday
Me: I’m tired
Dachi: come on kazu I need your help plzzzzzzzz
Dachi:plzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzzz
Dachi:!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Dachi:!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
Me: Fine I’ll go, just stop spamming
Dachi:ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʕ•̫͡•ʔ•̫͡•ʔ
Me: ……

I headed down to the park near our school. There I saw Dachi waving me over.

I yawned. “So remind me again, why am I here at 7 am.?”

“Well, this whole thing was your idea.”

“Context.”

“Remember what I said back at the batting cages? If I say I’m going to do something, then I’m going to do it. But, as you may have guessed. I’ve never asked someone out before. Since you have more experience than me, I was hoping you would help your best friend Dachi be more romantic.”

“I’m really not the best person for this. If anything, Rika would be better. Technically she was the one who proposed to me first.”

“Kazu, you're the only person I can ask for help. I only have one chance to impress Senpai. I really don’t want to mess it up.”

He's really serious about Saori-senpai, huh?

“Alright, I'll help. But, we’re going to need some backup.”

“Backup? Oh, like a real actress? Or a model?”

“Something like that,” I said as I text.”

“See Kazu this is why I’m glad I ask you to help. Replicating and acting out the proposal is a great idea.”

“It’ll be a while before she comes over. Want to grab something quick to eat.”

“Yes, I’m starving.”

“Lesson one. When it comes to romanticizing your love. Make sure you’re not hungry.”

After we got a bite to eat we headed back to the park.

“Hey, she’s here,” I said while waving.

“Huh? Where? All I see is Rika. Don’t tell me. You invited Rika-tan!”

“Don’t you trust my judgment?”

“At this moment, no.”

“If you need help being romantic, she is the best person for the job.”

“Dachi!” Rika shouts out. Am I too late? Have you become a man?”

“Huh? What are you talking about?”

“Kazuma-kun told me you were trying to become a man. And I wanted to see how it’s done.”

“Becoming a man? Really Kazu?”

I shrugged.

Dachi looks towards me and gives a sly smile.

“Actually, Rika-tan I am training to be a man, as I am trying to be HONEST about my FEELINGS, to the one I LOVE.”

Today is going to be a long day isn't it?

“Eh?” said Rika.

“Ah, never mind. The thing is I really like Senpai. So I want to make sure everything is perfect when I ask her out. That’s why I ask Kazu for help since he has experience.”

“Huh?”

“He knows about Operation Lovey-Dovey,” I said.

“Ah, I see. But Dachi I think you should just be straightforward with her. She’ll probably like that.”

“Ask her out on the spot. Without planning. Are you crazy? That’s like taking a final exam, without studying. For exams, you plan, prepare, and then you study your brains out. I can’t just ask out the love of my life without a plan.”

“Then let’s help you the best we can, right Kazuma-kun?”

“Right.”

“Thanks, you guys! So let’s get started. What should I do first, Kazu-sensei?”

I don’t know. “I guess we can think about location.”

“Location?” Dachi asked.

“Yeah, where are you going to confess?”

“How about an airport or a wedding!” Rika shouts.

“Talk about cliche, “ I said.

“Those are pretty good ideas. But Senpai isn’t going on a trip anytime soon. And it might be awkward to crash someone else's wedding.”

“There’s always the beach,” I said.

“Overdone.”

“But Tanaka’s ideas weren't.”

“Well, hers were more interesting.”

“Tsk, okay.”

Rika laughs.

“Sorry, it’s funny seeing you get so flustered Kazuma-kun.”

I blushed, “it’s nothing.”

“Classic Kazu, trying to keep cool, calm, and collected.”

“Instead of wasting your breath, why not think of a location.”

“Wait, I have another idea!” Tanaka shouts. “What about the school roof?”

“The school roof?” Dachi asked.

“It’s cliche, but we are in an anime and manga club. It’s very on-brand to confess to her on the roof.”

“Hmm, that’s not a bad idea. I’ll consider it. Now that the venue is selected, what's next?”

“How about dialogue? Do you know what you are going to say to her?”

“Oh, I got that part cover. Here check my phone.”

He opens his notes app. With Rika looking over my shoulder, we started to scroll, and scroll through the app.

“This is quite a lot,” Rika said.

“How many words did you write?”

“Around 15,000.”

“Cut it down!” Rika and I said.

“So like 10,000?”

We shook our heads.

“1000.”

“Shorter.”

“Okay, I’ll do bullet points.”

“Lastly, let's work on staging, where we put everything together,” I said. “Allow me to set the scene. It is a warm sunny afternoon. Earlier, you snuck a letter into Saori’s locker asking her to meet you on the roof. You’re waiting nervously. She enters. You prepare yourself, remembering what you’ve practiced. Especially your SHORT speech. Now you two are standing face to face. It’s time for you to tell her your true feelings.”

“Action!” Rika shouts.

Dachi clears his throat. “Senpai, um you’re… yeah I can’t do this.”

“What’s up?” I asked.

“Kazu, I get what you’re trying to do, but I’m not an actor. Maybe it’ll help if I’m actually talking to someone instead of myself.”

“Oh, what about me? I can pretend to be Saori,” Rika said.

I don’t know.

“Oh, that might work. What do you think, Kazu?”

“Sure, it should be fine.” I think.

“Ready Dachi?” Rika asks.

“Of course Saori,” he winks.

The two of them stand face to face. They’re standing a bit too close if you ask me. Dachi begins to speak. But it’s hard to hear. He reached up and put his hand on her cheek. Wait, did he just touch her? Is she okay with this? I forgot to go over safewords. Her face is turning red. Is she embarrassed? Could she possibly be enjoying it? I know they're not interested in each other, but what if?

“CUT!” I shouted.

“Oh is something wrong, Kazuma-kun?”

“Huh, something wrong with Kazu?”

“Well, he said “cut,” which is our safeword. We use it if we start feeling uncomfortable.”

Dachi raises his eyebrows and smiles, “Safeword huh?”

“Not like that.”

“So why pause the scene?” He asks.

“I thought it was going well.”Rika said.

Why did I stop the scene? For Rika’s safety? But she seems fine. And I know Dachi isn’t that kind of guy.”

“I think the scene was going on for too long. You don’t need fancy words, or romantic touches to get the point across. Just stick to something short and sweet.”

“Hmm, I think I need a demonstration. Why not show me using Rika-tan as your partner.”

Confessing to Rika-tan? I mean it shouldn’t be a problem. I can even see her saying something like we should practice confessing to each other since we’ll have to do it in the future. Yet, the thought petrify me.

“I think it’s better, if I do the scene with you. Experience is the best way to learn.”

“Fine, but you take the lead.”

We stand face-to-face with each other.

“Now action!” Rika shouts.

“I like you. Let’s go out. There I’m done.” I said.

“That’s it!” Dachi said.

“Yeah, like I said, keep it short and simple.”

“Dachi, I think Kazuma-kun is right. Compliments are nice and all, but I think it is better if you’re direct.”

“Well if you say so Rika-tan.”

“Hey didn’t you invite me for my expert opinion?”

“Well, you’re the one who said listen to Rika-tan.”

“So Dachi when are you going to confess?” Rika asks.

“Tomorrow.”

“Tomorrow?” Both Rika and I asked.

“Yeah, I feel like if I don’t do it now then I never will. But if she does end up rejecting me do you think it’ll still be possible for us to be friends.”

“I think so. I mean even if things don’t work out romantically, I can’t see you two not being friends.”

Rika nods in agreement.

“Also, when you ask her out, go to the roof of the old building, there are fewer people there,” I said.

“Thanks. Well, I probably should get going.”

“Hey Dachi if things don’t work out between you two, you’ll still have us by your side,” I said.

“That’s right Dachi!”

“You guys, that goes both ways. You know if you ever need help or advice then you can rely on me too. See you, love experts!”

“Hey, Tanaka, I'm sorry that our park meetup ended up being so unusual.”

“No worries, I had fun today. Now I can call myself a love expert. Tee-hee. ”

“Well, we have some time left, want to go on that short walk?”

“Okay!"