Join me to death

Ever since I was born I knew something was wrong with me.I always felt I was cursed.I didn't fit in with the people around me.I knew I was greedy.But I wanted something to fill this hole inside my broken heart.

All I wanted is to be loved,accepted and happy.So I am the one who stopped living.I was like a zombie.I waited for my death.I tried so many times to end my life.But he always came to rescue me.I didn't know why.Then I started dating the boy who saved me.Rarely I felt alive.But I was feeling alive when I am with him.

But still my memories,my current life affected my psychological stability.I suffer from depression since I was a teenager.I feel I am a burden to everyone one.That's right,nobody wants a red spider lily.

Why?Because it symbolizes death.But I always wished to be like cherry blossoms.My love called me a cherry blossom.Even that was enough for me.I always had the feeling that no matter how much I try to fit in it never worked.

And I always thought that death is the only way to be free and maybe someone is waiting for me.To be frank I wanted to live a little more to be with him.But I knew that one die he will.Everyone will die.

The more precious someone is to us,the harder it is for us to accept  that they might die.Sometimes you actually convice yourself there's no way they could die.That's what Uzumaki Nagato taught me.Not only his words but also his voice always break my heart.

So I made up the story of God of Death.I wanted him to realize I wanted to die along with him so I would never be separated from him.I wanted to die because I wanted to end my torture.I wanted to be free along with him.I also wished that we may reincarnated and meet in an other life and fall in love again.

For once again he tried to save me.I asked him why he did that.He told me "i love you".His actions,his words always found their way to touch my broken heart.I love him so much.I love him to death and beyond.

I don't know why.But I don't need a reason.He is my whole life.He is my everything.He is my soulmate.I just know it.Life without him has no meaning.He told me he wanted to die too.So both of us fell together until we fell and died.

If I died before him  would wait for him.If he died before me I would end up my life after his death in order to join him.Now we were spirits.Our torture was finally over.We holded our hands even as spirits.

"I will follow you anywhere even if we are dead."

"I won't let you go even if you try to escape."

"I don't ever want to escape from you.I want to be with you,forever."

"I want us forever.You are the reason I belive in love and you are my fate."

The red string of fate was wrapped around our finger.

"I love you,my lovely cherry blossom."

"I love you,with all my heart."

"I love you even more."

We kissed.We left together.