Chapter 11:

Oh no, it's him

Spice of Life


"Codename: Laks. Just call me Mimi," Mimi smiled as she twirled around in her work uniform.

"I take it there's some significance as to why these outfits are essentially a color swap of your uniform with an apron," Zuina said.

"Two big reasons. One, to denote that your primarily servers, and the second is so that you can swap over to cooking with ease," Rika explained.

"So we are to both entertain and cook?" Benihime asked.

"Appetizers only. Itsuki, Rika and I are the only ones that may cook everything," Masaru grumbled.

"For now at least. I'll drill some of the harder stuff into you in my spare time," Rika smiled.

"I'd prefer cooking over serving, but I suppose if even you three serve, I must as well," Matcha sighed.

"Hey, we should be glad the all cooking Masaru allows us to cook appetizers," Waki smiled.

"Well, now that the full team is here, lets get to it! The restaurant is now open!" Rika announced.

                                                                             ...

Things went relatively smoothly on the first day. Waki did flirt with Matcha a bit too much, but made up for it by helping out in the kitchen.

"Hmm, you actually are fairly competent despite your appearance and demeanor," Masaru said.

"Wish you'd said that praise to me back when you thrashed me at Tabemono," Waki replied.

"Sorry, but I don't recall ever seeing you there."

"That's cause back then I had long black hair that reached the floor and was gloomy and creepy, heck I was like that before Rika showed up and told me I'd be getting my cooking license back. Of course, she first had me do something about my look and attitude and well, guess I'm a punk gyaru now."

"Long black hair... HUH!? No way your that same creepy girl."

"Hey, it was totes a change for the better. I'm way more confident now thanks to Rika. You're lucky to have her for a woman."

Masaru decided to end the conversation there and returned to cooking.

                                                                           ...

"You all did good today. Congratulations on your first day," Rika smiled as the restaurant closed.

"So wanna hit up a karaoke place?" Waki asked.

"Not a bad idea. Everyone should come, you too Itsuki and Masaru."

Masaru and Itsuki both nervously twitched. Neither of them had been to karaoke before.

                                                                           ...

At the karaoke bar, Masaru and Itsuki sat nervously as the others got into it.

"I wanted to try one of these places out last time but didn't get the chance. Time to go all out!" Mimi shouted as she took the mike.

"Where are our drinks dammit!? I want more!" Matcha groaned as she finished her third cup of beer.

"Cmon girl, save some for the rest of us," Waki giggled as she cuddled up to Matcha and grabbed Itsuki's untouched glass of beer.

"I'll have em just give us the whole keg. I brought some snacks they can sell for bargaining," Rika smiled.

"Huh? Rika what do you mean bargaining!?" Masaru shouted.

"It's called building good neighborhood relations. We supply so good snacks, they provide discounts."

"It's not a bad plan. Chefs need to build up good relations with vendors and suppliers. Come to think of it, how is the restaurant's drink menu fairing?" Itsuki asked.

"I was able to get a deal with the country's largest beer producer," Masaru stated.

"Water's pretty much the least gourmet thing he approved, and even that's from a nice spring. But there's a bunch of drinks I want to add, but with cook-offs on hold until we get to a comfortable financial spot, they'll have to wait. As for the sweets, I made em with my own stash so no need to worry," Rika stated as she walked out.

As she walked down the hall, she noticed the attendant having a quarrel with an eccentric looking man wearing a green hakama and pointy red shoes. His face was also painted and he had a purple beard and hair styled in a top knot.

"Oh no, it's him," Rika groaned.

She quickly retreated to the karaoke room only to find everyone was out cold.

"Shit! Knockout gas," Rika thought as she pulled out her secret gas mask.

Waki groggily woke up and stared at Rika.

"So we bein targeted?" she asked.

"I saw a clown at the front, it's probably him," Rika groaned.

"Well, it's just knockout gas so we should be fine, but I already pinged Stitch."

"Alright Wak, time to clean up the clown and his goons."

Like Rika, Waki was also a former assassin. She had a high immunity to poison as well as knockout gas and chlorophorm. She had known Rika for a while and even came to cooking school with her. It was there that she first met Matcha and developed a crush for her. Waki was a fine chef thanks to prior training, but was initially expelled after losing to Masaru in a cook off. The loss ate at her, and her family attempted to eliminate her for her blacklisting and subsequent attention said blacklisting brought to her family as a whole. Waki survived the attack thanks to Rika, and after the remedial course was announced, Rika gave her a makeover and she agreed to help Rika both pass the course, and work in her restaurant.

                                                                               ...

"Buwahahahaha! As I was saying, if you don't add my album to your songlist, all the guests will become my prisoners! My ninjas have already knocked them out and are on standby to spirit them away!" the eccentric man proclaimed.

"The hell are you talking about!? Get lost or I'll call the police you deranged chuuni," the attendant glared.

"These your boys? Lol, they were totes weaksauce," Waki said as she tossed a pile of unconscious ninjas infront of the man.

"HUH!? Is this some sort of television shoot!? Shit, I gotta do my makeup," the attendant cried as she ran off to the bathroom.

"A gyaru and a gas mask? Don't know don't care, die." the eccentric man glared as he threw two knives at Waki and Rika at breakneck speed.

The two dodged at the last second as the man pulled out 10 more throwing knives and began throwing them. Suddenly the knives vanished before they could land.

"Looking for these? Sorry, but they're going in a trash heap along with your corpse," Dastard glared as he made his appearance.

"YOU! YOU'VE BEEN ROBBING ME DAY AND NIGHT FOR THE PAST DECADE!" the man glared.

"Die."

The eccentric man leapt out of the way of Dastard's swing. He then ran into a karaoke room and grabbed a mic.

"Too late you fool! My new song has hypnosis in it so all who hear it will worship me!"

The three froze as the music began playing.

"Ugh, I can't move!" Rika thought.

"Buwahahahaha! This song freezes you in place as long as it's active, and now... the main event! Behold! The anthem of the almighty crime lord and evil daimyo, Jester!" the man proclaimed as the song became more intense.

Shamizans and electric guitars furiously played as Jester sung his theme song.

“Yo Yoi! I am the greatest criminal from the depths of Edo. The great daimyo of organized crime. Everyone fears my name! For every atrocity, I have attained! Murder! Kidnapping! Drug Smuggling! None can match my Might! Theft! Assault! War Crimes! All now fear my wrath! With my evil ninjitsu I will conquer all that’s good. They say Jesters are the fools, WELL WHO'S LAUGHING NOW DUMBASS! Lalalalalala! Jester-sama is the evil, dastardly, wicked, inhumane, dark ninjutsu daimyo! Oh oh oh oh! Yooooooo!”

Everyone cringed as the song ended.

"Buwahahaha! How do you like that! My themesong with movement restriction hypnosis!" Jester laughed.

"Um boss, why are you in there?" a ninja asked as he stumbled towards Jester.

"Huh? Cuz it was the closest room duh."

"But that's the one where we put the spring booby trap."

"HUH!? I never told you to put in something like that!" Jester cried as he immediately dashed up to his ninja.

"Well, now I'm safe. Though chuck these three on the spring and see how far they fly- huh? Why am I stuck to the floor?"

Jester looked down and noticed the tile he stepped on was covered in glue.

"Codename: Laks, time for you to fly to hell," the ninja declared.

Suddenly, the tile Jester was standing on was shot up through the roof via a spring trap. As Jester flew high into the sky, he clicked his tongue and pulled out a paraglider.

"You're not my ninja! Laks huh? Where'd I hear that again? ... AH!?"

As Jester was distracted by his thoughts a swarm of rockets hit him and sent him blasting off.

"[FUCK YOU] WHOEVER YOU ARE!" Jester shouted as he flew away.

Waki, Rika, and Dastard turned to the ninja that saved them.

"You know you could move again right as he finished singing right?" the ninja stated as they pulled off their disguise.

It was Mimi.

"Not all of us have hypnosis immunity," Dastard sighed.

"Huh? How do you know about my ability!?" Mimi cried.

"AH! I am Dastard! The dastardly thief! I only announce my presence once I've already stolen and secured my target at a safe location! I have stolen... the dossier that explains your secret ability!" Dastard stuttered as he vanished in a puff of smoke.

"EHHHHH!?"

"Ugh, don't tell me she doesn't realize it's her old friend," Rika groaned.

Mario Nakano 64
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