Chapter 1: Gaze Into The Night Sky

On the 15th of October, I found myself standing at the rooftop of our apartment building, gazing upon the night sky with the intention of ending it all right here. Working all day, all night makes me feel tired in life. The only thing I have is my mother who suffers from an illness and bedridden in the hospital.

They said there are two Gods that rule this world. Eros, The God who brings life and Thanatos who brings death. Both of them could appear in front of a person depending on who they were. Well, I never believe on any myths like this on the first place

My legs were shaking, maybe because I'm scared to heights or just I'm scared to die. I think of my mother who had an illness. I will make her cry when I die. There is still part in my heart that wants to live for the sake of my mother. Contemplating my life decision, I closed my eyes and let fate decide.

When I was about to place my left foot into the emptiness, A door opened from the entrance and a lady slowly walked towards me. Suddenly the lady sat beside me. With her warm gaze I found myself staring at her. A gentle breeze flew through her hair and gently weaved it. I think I fell in love at first glance.

She slowly turned her head towards me and talked.

"What are you doing?"

Her warm voice makes me wanna tear up. I found her words soothing to my ears. She didn't stopped me but instead she strike a conversation on me

I slowly put back my foot into the edge and sat beside her. From there, we had a small conversation about ourselves and our lives. I learned that she was a new tenant here and we lived on the same floor of the building. I never thought that in the days I wanted to end it all, I met her.

The next day, I stood again on the edge of the rooftop. I was interrupted yesterday and I don't wanna involve somebody in this craziness. A strong cold breeze flows towards me and my legs are still shaking while standing at the edge. But unlike yesterday the thoughts of my mother resouds me more.

"Is this really I wanted"

Contemplating my life decisions once more, I decided to sit on the edge and stare at the night sky. Unexpectedly, someone touched my shoulders and whisper to my ear

"What are you doing"

The girl from yesterday appeared again while I was on the edge of the rooftop. Is this a coincidence or something?

Suddenly, My phone rang. It's from the hospital where my mother was confined. The news that the Doctor told me through Phone Call shattered my heart. My mother is being resuscitated right now in the hospital.

I got my feet back on the ground and hurriedly rushed to the hospital where my mother was. When I got there, the doctor came to me and told me the most painful news in my life. My mother passed away.

Feeling devastated, I got myself up and arranged my own mother's funeral. My heart and mind is only filled with sad thoughts and I can't think straight anymore as if my mind and heart was consumed by sadness.

I really wanted to talk to someone about my feelings right now and the girl from the rooftop is the first one that comes to my mind. I got myself to the front of the apartment she said she's living in. But the room is locked. I tried to knock and knock until someone from the next door open the door and said

"There's no tenant lived there for a long time"

"That's impossible, she just said that she moved here in the past few days"

Couldn't believe on what's happening. I frantically searched for her and I found myself on the rooftop where I met her for the first time. But now she's not there.

"Am I being a delusional now"

"Who are you? Where are you?"

Hopeless, I started to cry and kneeled in the ground. I didn't understand why people I know suddenly disappeared. Why do I need to suffer like this?

I shut myself in my room and didn't leave or even eat. I can't remember how long I was there in my room and next thing I saw, I was on the door leading to the entrance of the rooftop in the middle of the night.

I finally made up my mind. I'm tired from all this suffering, I wanted to end it all.

As I opened the door, I saw a familiar figure at the edge of the building. It was the girl I met from the past few days. But now she was standing from the edge. Her hair was shining and her hair was being blown by the wind.

She slowly turns her head to me and she extends her arms to me.

"Are you ready"

From that moment I realized that she was not a person, but a persona from the God itself Thanatos. She was the God that leads people to death. I really thought that this is only a myth.

I slowly grabs her hand and said

"I'm ready"

There is no point refusing my death. There's no loved ones I left anymore. No one will ever care about my death.

As we stood from the edge, a cold breeze wrapped into my body and I could feel her heat in her hand. I looked at her while her hair was blowing away.

"Thank you…, Thank you for waiting"

In the night full of darkness, Her gaze shines like a star.

"If I had a chance to lived again, Could I ever meet you again"

My final thoughts about you came as I closed my eyes.

We leap forward and raced into the night.