A Second Chance for Orpheus

It’s said there are two types of people:

Those ruled by the desire for life - Eros

And those ruled by the desire for death - Thanatos.

“Well, that’s a crude oversimplification of things,” the man sitting at the desk thought as he read the line in the file on hand. His tall frame hunched over the disproportionately small desk.

Tick tick tick

The old mechanical wooden grandfather clock was strikingly loud in this grand hallway of white marble and crimson drapes. The man at the desk liked it, though. Before he got it, the hallway was silent. Such a loud, domineering silence. It felt uncomfortable. Now, the ticking of the clock kept him company. The man paused a few more seconds to savor the mechanical ticks of the clock before turning his attention back at the file in his hand and continued reading:

Name: Yuzu Arima

Age: 24

Occupation: Account Manager

Cause of Death: Suicide

“... Why this one?”

“He was lonely and tired. He was in pain.” A young girl’s voice came from behind the man. A sweet innocent face. A sweet but sad face.

“I don’t get it.”

“Don’t get what?”

“Humans have what - eighty years?”

“If they’re lucky.”

“Right. They’re going to die sooner or later. Why would you rush them?”

“Because they love Thanatos,” the girl offered.

“You’ve got a brother complex,” the man snorted.

“Am I wrong? This man was ruled by the desire for death. Thanatos is Death.”

“Non-violent Death,” the man corrected. “Non-violent and peaceful death. People always forget that part.”

“You don’t think ending it all is peaceful?” The girl tilted her head.

The man looked down again at the file in his hand and shrugged. “He’s in the waiting room?” The girl nodded. The man got up and put on his large gray suit jacket. “You don’t want to come with? He’s here because of you.”

The girl shook her head this time. “I have more to tend to.” Without waiting for a response, she turned her back on him and walked away down the long dark hall.

“What a troublesome sister,” the man muttered to himself before walking in the opposite direction.

After walking a bit, the man came to a set of unassuming wooden doors on the wall of the long hallway. Inside sat rows of wooden benches. With the high arching stone walls and ceilings, one could be mistaken for being in a church chapel. A man paced back and forth between two benches. Slightly frazzled hair, thick glasses, a somewhat oversized sweater - an unremarkable man by any definition.

“Arima?” the man asked. The person who was apparently Arima stopped in his tracks and looked over and nodded in response to the question. “I hope you don’t mind the casualness. It’s good to meet you,” the man offered his gloved hand.

Arima cautiously accepted the gesture and returned the shake. “And you are?”

“Doesn’t matter,” the man brushed it off.

“Thanatos?” Arima asked dumbfoundedly.

“I’m taking you to see him.”

“Him?”

The man ignored the question. “Ready?”

Tick tick tick

“It’s just everything is moving a bit fast,” Arima said as he tried to collect himself.

Even from here, the sound of the grandfather clock could be heard. The man offered an apologetic bow. “Sorry, I’m usually more slow-paced than this. But you’re on a bit of a tight schedule.” He turned around and walked out of the room back into the hallway.

“Am I dead?” Arima asked as he followed along.

“Almost.”

The morbid thought lingered over the two as they walked down the hallway. Taking a sudden turn, they came face to face with the girl from earlier. Arima’s eyes gleamed with recognition.

“Thanatos?” Arima said hopefully.

She avoided his gaze. A familiar hint of embarrassment entering her otherwise alien eyes. “Sorry, I’m not Thanatos. I’m sorry that I tricked you.” 

“But you were the one who told me to jump with you. You held out your hand and told me to run away with you into the night and escape all the pains and frustrations of the world.” Arima was frantic now. Confusion and anger mixed into the sound of one who was betrayed.

“I didn’t want to see you in so much pain anymore,” the girl said apologetically. “Thanatos is my brother. He’s really wonderful. I thought you would be so much more at peace if you went to him. But you wouldn’t have come if you knew who I really was.”

“And who are-” Arima started, but before he could finish the girl spotted someone coming down the hallway and with a terrified yelp she quickly scurried away. That someone was another woman.

“Oizys, can we please just talk!” the woman shouted before stopping in front of Arima and the man with an exasperated gasp of breath. “How does she run so fast?”

“You should know. She’s your cousin,” the man said, observing the scene before him with bemused indifference.

“She’s your sister,” the woman shot back.

“You’re right. We’re a rather messy family aren’t we?”

The woman smiled. Her pink cheeks and vibrant red hair made her smile glow all the more. She turned her attention to Arima. “May I?” she asked, opening her arms welcomingly.

Arima looked surprised but hesitantly nodded. The woman’s smile glowed even brighter as she leaned in and hugged Arima. “I’m so sorry we haven't spent much time together lately.” Her hug tightened warmly and snuggly around Arima.

“Sorry… are you Eros?” Arima asked as he let himself return the hug.

“I think he was a psychology fan. Freud and all of that,” the man chuckled. “Eros and Thanatos. Love for Life and Seeking Death.”

“Yes, well, Thanatos is the God of Nonviolent Death,” the woman laughed as she released Arima.

“I was just telling that to Oizys earlier,” the man noted with vindication.

“I think it's a useful theory,” Arima meekly defended himself.

“It is,” the woman gently affirmed, “love does drive us to live. Thinking of love as Eros is useful. Eros is love. He’s my brother - passionate and physical love.”

“And you are?”

“Philautia,” the woman said with a slightly dramatic curtsey.

“Self-love,” the man explained, “and before you think it - not that type of self-love.” Arima’s face went red at the thought.

Philautia smacked the man on the shoulder. “Don't go around besmirching my good name,” she playfully pouted. She turned back towards Arima. “If you choose to go back, I’ll always be there if you want to find me. I’m a bit small so I’m easy to miss, but I’m always willing to spend time with you.”

“I get to choose?” Arima asked.

“Well, it depends on Thanatos’s mood,” Philautia admitted. She glanced at the man smiling behind Arima. “But I think he’s in a good one today. Anyways, I have to chase after Oizys. Bye!” With that, she was off. Arima stood in place watching as Philautia disappeared down the hallway.

“You okay?” the man asked.

“I feel a little dumb,” Arima admitted.

“Don’t. Nuance is helpful. But it’s not always a mental or logical thing. Sometimes it’s just feelings. And it’s easy to get overwhelmed by too much or too little of them.” Arima glanced at the man with a curious look. He seemed somewhat friendlier than earlier.

Tick tick tick

“Anyways, let’s get you to Thanatos. Right through that door,” the man gestured ahead. This time a set of imposing marble doors gilded with gold and silver.

“You’re not coming with me?”

“I get the feeling I’ll see you again.”

Arima steeled himself and approached the doors. A pure white light seeped through the cracks as they slowly opened. Arima looked back at the man and quickly asked, “Any advice?”

As the doors opened and the bright light began to illuminate the man’s face, he took a moment to think. “Humans live what? Eighty years on average? You’ll see Thanatos sooner or later. So why not experience what you can? I love stories, so be sure to come with plenty next time we meet.”

“Wait! You’re-” Arima started.

“Oh, and take care of Oizys. I’m sure you’ll run into her again. She’s troublesome but she’s family.” Before Arima could interject, the bright light enveloped and blinded him.

Tick tick tick

Blinking through the field of white, lines and figures started to come into vision once again. He laid in bed - his childhood bed. The sound of his family’s grandfather clock ticking away from the living room. His sister slept in a chair next to his bed sitting vigil over him.

There are those who seek death because of pain and suffering - Oizys.

And there are those who are driven to live by love - Eros.

To live and love means to also love yourself - Philautia.

And self-love means accepting yourself. All of yourself - Oizys.

We all meet death eventually - why not live, love, hurt, struggle and experience this world before we meet him - Thanatos.