Reincarnation

Riku felt nothing. He couldn't feel the pain from his shattered arms and ribs, or the blood that soaked his clothes. He couldn't feel the cold pavement beneath him, or the warm tears that fell on his beaten and bruised face. He couldn't even feel his own heartbeat, which was slowing down with every second. He was dying, and he knew it.

He opened his eyes and saw Kai, his best friend, hovering over him. Kai's face was twisted with horror and grief, and he was shouting something into his phone. Riku could see the panic in his eyes and the desperation in his voice. He tried to speak, but no sound came out. He wanted to tell Kai that it wasn't his fault, that he couldn’t have stopped those people from pushing him in front of the truck.

He wanted to tell Kai one last thing.

He mouthed the words, hoping that Kai would understand. "If you die...find me...next life..."

Kai looked at him and shook his head. "Don't say that, Riku. Don't you dare say that. You're not going to die. You're going to be okay. Just stay with me, okay? Stay with me."

“Please…” Riku added softly. “Promise me that you'll… be my friend again…"

Kai clammed his eyes shut tightly, holding back a scream of flooded emotions, before nodding, choking on his words. "I promise, Riku. I promise."

He held Riku's hand and pressed it close to his chest, leaned down, and kissed his forehead, whispering words of comfort and hope.

Riku smiled weakly and nodded. He knew it was all a lie, but he didn't mind. He was happy to see Kai's face, even if it was the last thing he would see in this life. At this point, he welcomed death. He was going to find his parents and Misha. He still has so many regrets that he needs to amend with them all, but especially with Misha…

Riku felt a gentle breeze on his face and listened to Kai's voice fading away. He looked up at the stars breaking through the clouds and let go, letting the true darkness embrace his mind and body…

Riku opened his eyes again. He felt a warm embrace around him, and a gentle voice whispering in his ear. He looked up and saw a woman with long black hair and brown eyes, smiling at him with love. She was his mother, but not the one he remembered.

He remembered his old life, the one he had left behind what felt like just a moment ago. He remembered his friend, who had cried over his broken body after he was hit by a truck. He remembered the pain, the fear, the regret. He remembered the feeling of dying.

He cried. He cried for losing Kai, the only real friend he knew, and his uncle, the only family he had left in his past life. Nothing has ever been easy for Riku. The memory of his past life at the moment was spotty, but big points of his past life were beginning to flood his mind. He knew that he had always needed to work hard for the things that he had, and he could never seem to hold onto them for long. Giving the fact he was a baby now, he didn’t think it would matter too much and let it all out. He cried until he had no more tears left.

"It's okay, my son. It's okay. You're safe. You're with me." his mother said as she stroked Riku’s white hair and kissed his forehead. She didn't know why he was crying, but she tried to comfort him. She felt a surge of love and protectiveness for her son, who was born different from everyone else.

She called for the nurses, who came in with a clipboard. They checked Riku's vital signs and scanned his body with peering eyes, but they could only confirm what his mother already knew… he had no arms. His shoulders ended in smooth skin, as if they were never meant to have limbs.

They said it could be a rare genetic defect, and that there was obviously nothing that anyone could do to fix it. They explained that he would have to live with it for the rest of his life and that it would probably be best to not let Riku suffer.

“No…” the mother cut them off before they could continue any further, “I don’t care. He is just fine the way that he is. The Gods have their reasons and plans already set in place for everything. They wanted him to be born this way, and for that, he is perfect the way that he is… He is alive and will continue living.” she said firmly, holding Riku close to her chest. She glared at the nurses, daring them to say anything else.

The nurses bowed their heads humbly and said they were sorry. They apologized for their insensitivity and left the room quietly. The mother thanked the nurses as they left through the sliding paper doors to the room. She wanted some privacy with her son, other than the handful of servant women who were doing other things in the room. Pulling him close, she sang him a lullaby to help calm Riku and make him stop crying.

Riku felt his mother's warmth and heard her soothing voice. She wondered why he was crying.

Is he in pain somehow? She thought to herself with worry. Though, this was just Riku letting out eighteen years of pent-up emotions from his past life, especially over the last twenty-four hours of it.

"You're my miracle, my precious gift. You will get strong one day, and you will make everyone regret that they ever doubted you… I know it.” She said softly into Riku’s ear as he came to stop crying, right before there was a knock on the door. She looked up and saw a little girl standing there, with shoulder-length black hair and brown eyes. She was wearing a frilly dress and a flower-like bow on her head. She was Riku's new big sister.

"Mommy, can I come in? I want to see the baby." She asked.

The mother smiled warmly, "Of course, Sakura. Come in." she said, inviting her daughter to join them on the bed. Sakura ran into the room and jumped on the bed, her pink kimono-like dress fluttering behind her. She looked at Riku with curiosity and excitement, her brown eyes sparkling like stars.

"He's so cute! Can I hold him?" she asked, clapping her hands together.

"… Alright, be careful. He's very fragile." the mother said after a moment of mental debate. She handed Riku to Sakura, who cradled him in her arms. The mother wore a simple white yukata, her black hair tied in a bun with a red ribbon. Now that Riku was looking at her from the front, she looked tired but happy, sitting on a low setting bed next to an equally low table.

What kind of woman lets a kid this young hold a baby this close to the end of a bed!? Riku thought as he bounced his wide eyes from up at the girl holding him, the mother, and the floor, praying Sakura wouldn't drop him.

"Hi, baby brother. I'm Sakura. I'm your big sister." she said with a wide smile, full of innocent joy. She kissed him on the cheek, making Riku stop looking around and focus on her.

Now that he looked at Sakura more closely, Riku couldn't help but think that she looked a lot like Misha did when she was little. Though this couldn't have been her, he carried over his memories to this life, he would think that she would have as well. Also, this was not the way that Misha acted before… So, this wasn't her or if it was, she was putting on a really good show…?

He felt a mix of emotions… nostalgia, longing, doubt, curiosity all at once…

Could this be Misha?

“Mommy, what’s his name?” Sakura asked, her eyes wide with curiosity as she looked from Riku to her mother.

“His name is Takisuma.” the mother replied, reaching out to brush Riku’s white hair through her fingers. Riku felt a jolt of surprise. His hair was white!? This was the first time that he caught a glimpse of it. In his previous life, his hair was black like his mother's, and giving he carried over his memories, he figured that he would look just like he did in the past life as well…

If that is the case… Riku—or Takisuma now—thought, Could people carry over their looks and not memories?

Takisuma looked back up to Sakura longingly… Is this really you Misha…?

Sakura tilted her head to one side, her brows furrowing in a frown. “Takisuma?” she echoed, “That’s a long name.”

I agree… my entire name, “Sato Riku” in my past life, has just as many letters as this new first name… Takisuma thought tiredly. This will be a pain getting used to…

Her mother chuckled softly, her eyes twinkling with amusement. “It’s a beautiful name,” she explained. “It means ‘noble warrior’.”

… Not a bad ring to it actually… Takisuma thought after a moment of mulling over the new name and its meaning.

Sakura shrugged, her frown melting into a bright smile again. “Okay then. I’ll call him Taki for short.”

“Taki?” her mother repeated, a soft laugh escaping her lips. “That’s cute.”

Sakura then pulled Takisuma closer to her chest, wrapping her arms around him in a gentle hug. She whispered in his ear, "I love you, Taki. You're my precious little brother. I’ll always be here for you."

Takisuma felt a surge of warmth in his chest, but also a hint of sadness. He couldn’t help but wonder if this girl was Misha or not. He couldn’t tell, and he cursed himself for that. After the many years he knew Misha, and he couldn’t be cut and dry on whether she was looking down at him now or if this was someone completely different. He wondered if he would ever see Misha again, if this girl wasn’t her, and doomed to live this new life without her.

His thoughts were soon shattered when the door of the room opened, and a tall man walked in. He had black hair tied in a ponytail and sharp eyes that scanned the room. He was wearing a dark kimono-like robe with the emblem of a dragon on the back. He was clearly the father of Sakura and Taki, and the husband of their mother.

He walked towards the bed where his wife and children were, but his expression was not one of joy or love. It was one of anger and disgust. He looked at Taki with a cold glare and spat out, "What is this abomination?"

… well, that sure was some fatherly love…

His wife gasped. "Ryuu, please don't say that. This is our son, Takisuma. He's your son too." she said, gently taking Taki from Sakura and held him protectively.

Ryuu snorted and pointed at Taki's lack of arms, white hair, and bright blue eyes. "Don't lie to me, Hana. This thing is not my son. It's obvious that you've been unfaithful to me. You've been sleeping with that blacksmith, haven't you? The one who's always hanging around you. What's his name? Kuroda? Yeah, that's it. You've been cheating on me with that man, and this is the result."

Hana shook her head vehemently and tears welled up in her eyes. "No, Ryuu, no! That's not true! I've never betrayed you! I've never even looked at another man! Kuroda is just a friend, nothing more! He and his family have been loyal to the Komono House for generations…! He has a wife that he loves dearly! He would never do such a thing!"

Ryuu clenched his fists and raised his voice. "Don't insult my intelligence! You think I'm blind? You think I don't see how close you are to him? How he always smiles at you and compliments you? How he always touches you when he hands you something? How he always visits you when I'm away? You think I don't notice these things? You think I'm a fool?"

Hana sobbed and pleaded with him. "Ryuu, please, listen to me! You're mistaken! I love you, Ryuu! Only you! Please believe me!"

Ryuu shook his head and turned away from her. He said coldly, "I don't believe you, Hana. I don't believe a word you say. You've broken my trust and my heart. You've dishonored me and the entire House. You've given me a bastard son who will bring this name nothing but shame and trouble."

He then walked towards the door, ignoring the cries of his wife and the maids who tried to stop him.

Sakura, who had been silent until then, finally spoke up. She said in a trembling voice, "Father, please don't go! Please don't hate Taki! He's your son too! He's my brother! I love him!"

Ryuu stopped at the door and looked back at her with a mix of pity and contempt. He said softly, "Sakura... my daughter... you're too young to understand these things. You're too innocent to see the truth. You're too naive to know what's best for you."

He then sighed and said in a louder voice, "You're also too foolish to realize that this child is not your brother… He's an impostor."

He then slammed the wood and paper sliding door behind him, leaving behind a scene of chaos and despair.

Taki felt a chill in his soul as he heard his father's words. He felt fear and sadness as he saw his mother's tears. He felt a surge of anger and resentment as he realized his father's hatred.

Why? Why does he reject me so easily? Why does he blame this woman for something she didn't seem to do? He thought to himself. But then again, what do I know? I know nothing about this woman, or him. How can I defend one or the other?

He looked around the room and saw the faces of the people who were supposed to be his family. His mother, who was sobbing uncontrollably on the bed, clutching him to her chest. His sister, who was crying softly on the other side of the bed. The maids, who were standing in shock and fear, not knowing what to do or say. The room was filled with silence, broken only by the occasional sniffle or whimper.

What was he supposed to do? Back in his past life, Takisuma would have probably chased down the man and have him apologize, though, that probably would have just made things worse in this situation. More realistically, he would have tried to get a better understanding of everything, but that wasn’t an option, not as he was now…

Damnit… why couldn’t have I been reincarnated as my eighteen-year-old self? Takisuma thought with closed eyes and furrowed brows. That would have probably made things a whole lot easier. Like finding Misha for starters…

Takisuma just bit his tongue and accepted his role, the baby. In his past life, he was always the one who had to fix problems some way or another. After losing his father at a young age, he had to learn quickly how to help provide. Which was the only thing that kept Misha and him alive after his mother passed away a couple years prior to his own death.

Now that he was a baby again, he could at least take a rest for a couple years and not have to worry about things like this, and he wouldn’t need to feel guilt for that either.

Let the adults handle the adult problems, and let the kids be kids… He thought to himself. He needed to portray his role the best that he could. … Though… what would that be in this given situation?

Takisuma opened his eyes after coming to his conclusion…

He decided to cry.