Chapter 32:

Chapter 32 A Tunnel Under The Wall

Hermit's Diary



I decided to up the ante, unleashing a full array of dramatic goblin gestures in a futile attempt to catch the guard's eye. My limbs flailed like overcooked noodles, my attempts at looking pitiable and helpless evolving into a comical dance of despair.

 "Wreeeee! Notice me, towering guardian! I am but a morsel-sized goblin in need, a speck yearning for salvation, yes, yes!"

But my pathetic chirps and clicks failed to make an impact. The goblin guard, consumed by his affairs, remained blissfully ignorant of the tiny drama unfolding at the wall. My plight continued, as I, the overlooked goblin hatchling, pondered the cruel irony of being too small to attract attention in a world that cared not for the pint-sized.

With my vocal cords straining to their absolute limit, I unleashed a torrent of wails that echoed through the cruel walls of the goblin camp, at least I imagined it did.  

"Wreeeee, open up! Goblin in need, goblin in desperate need! Help me!" My voice, a pitiful symphony of chirps and clicks resembling the anguished cries of a thousand goblins trapped in the depths of torture chambers.

My efforts seemed to evaporate into thin air, as the towering goblin guard loomed over the wall, completely oblivious. I, a tiny goblin hatchling not larger than an apple, stood there in the shadows, my tiny limbs quivering with desperation.

The guard, with his colossal size and dull-witted demeanor, was impervious to the delicate pleas of a goblin hatchling of my stature. My voice, not louder than a mouse's squeak, failed to register in his ears, lost in the racket of goblin life that surrounded him.

"Gobbie! Big one! Lookie here! Little goblin needs help! Hoo-hoo! Notice me, big gobbie! Me tiny, you big! Helpy help, please!" I continued to unleash desperate cries, each strained utterance tearing through my frail vocal cords. Blood trickled from my tiny mouth, a gruesome testament to the futile violence my vocal efforts inflicted upon my fragile form. The feeble whispers of my pitiful shrieks reverberated through the camp, like a haunting melody of despair, yet they remained unheard.

As the rain continued to pound my sensitive skin, I huddled closer to the wall.

 "Maybe find a hole? Sneak, sneak in. Yes, yes! Find a hole, sneak!" I repeated my feeble plan as if the rocks and grass around me could contribute sage advice.

Driven by desperation, I scuttled for hours, my small frame navigating the walls of the goblin camp. My eyes desperately searched for a crack, a crevice, any minuscule opening through which I might enter the camp. However, fate seemed to mock my feeble attempts, presenting only treacherous obstacles in the form of sharp splinters and unforgiving edges that scraped and bruised my sensitive skin, adorning my body with cuts and scrapes.

 "Ouchie! Bad pointy things hurt Hermit. Stupid walls! Why so pointy?"

Soon exhaustion overcame my weakened body and I sought refuge in a meager shelter - an improvised haven of rocks and a tall grass overhang. 

"Ugh, goblin tired. Goblin needs rest," I mumbled to myself, my voice a pitiful squeak.

Nestling within this feeble sanctuary, I allowed my shivering limbs a few precious moments of respite. My mind raced, desperately pondering plans to enter the camp.

"But how to get past the big wall? No idea. Maybe fly like a bird? No wings. Silly goblin. Maybe dig under the wall, like burrow bugs! Yes! It is!" I chuckled softly, the sound a mix of desperation and absurdity.

Resting within the makeshift shelter, I took a moment to catch my breath. My tiny mouth, now stained with the taste of coppery blood, throbbed with strain and pain.

 The sky, an indifferent canvas of gray clouds, offered no solace, and the walls of the goblin camp loomed high, casting a shadow over my insignificant form. Exhaustion clung to my feeble frame like a relentless specter. My limbs, battered and bruised from my fruitless endeavors, yearned for respite. I nestled in the sheltered nook, curling into a ball as the tall grass overhang provided a feeble shield against the rain.

As I rested, the damp ground beneath me seemed to absorb the warmth from my tiny body, leaving me shivering in the cold. Thoughts of survival danced in my goblin mind, and with each passing moment, I succumbed to the weariness, each passing moment felt heavier than the last. The relentless drumming of raindrops overhead served as a dissonant lullaby, lulling me into a fitful slumber.

But my restless slumber was abruptly shattered as the sensation of sliminess invaded my sensitive skin. Stirring from my uneasy sleep, I peered outside my rocky refuge, finding myself immersed in the oppressive darkness of the night. Blinking repeatedly to adjust my vision to the shadows, I discovered a grotesque sight - tiny slugs inching their way across my body. These repulsive creatures were feasting on the remnants of my makeshift leaf raincoat.

"Ewww, look at these little slimy guys! It's like a snack right on my skin. Are you hungry too, little buddies? Well, guess what? So am I!" I chuckled with a mixture of disgust and delight.

I plucked the slugs one by one, holding them up to inspect their squirming forms. With a wicked grin, I said, "You're not the prettiest snack, but desperate times call for desperate measures, right?"

The grim reality of hunger gnawing at my insides stirred me to feast on these tiny crawlers. I seized the slugs one by one, their slimy bodies squirming futilely in my grasp. I brought each slug to my gaping mouth and slurped them down my throat. The slimy forms slithered down with an unsettling ease, their taste lingering on in my mouth - a grotesque banquet in the heart of the desolate night.

The slugs were a disgusting morsel but surprisingly delicious for my goblin tongue, I couldn't help but let out absurdly delighted chirps and clicks. My goblin tongue, still healing from the ordeal, attempted to form words of gratitude to the slimy creatures.

"Yum-yum, sluggies! Slurpy, slurpy, little slugs, come to gobby's tummy!" I mumbled between slurps, "Good... good for the belly. Tummy is happy! Mmm... crunchy-squishy, just right."

The slugs wriggled and squirmed inside my belly, and I couldn't help but let out a delighted sigh, "Ah, the joys of tasty grub! Who knew the night could bring such tasty morsel?"

With a last of the slugs sliding down my throat I said, "Sluggy friends, you go down, down, down, make goblin happy! Gheghe! Now, time for a sleepy, dream about more sluggy adventures! Goodnight, little slimy friends! Ghegheghe!"

"Mmm, belly full of slimy goodness. Mmm, my belly feels funny but slurpy slugs make my tummy happy. Slugs make a good sleepy-time snack! Ghegheghe!" I mumbled to myself in a delighted tone, my gnarled fingers patting and rubbing the squirming mass inside.

With a satisfied groan, I nestled back into my rocky refuge, embracing the peculiar warmth that now emanated from my belly full of slimy delicacies. The squirming sensations provided a peculiar comfort, and as the night enveloped me once more, I succumbed to the blissful embrace of goblin dreams.

 "Sleep tight in my belly, little sluggy friends. Gheghe! More sluggy snacks later. Gob dreams now."

With the first light of morning, I squinted and blinked, feeling the harsh slap of the unforgiving sun on my face as I rose from my rocky nest. The time had come for my grand plan - the ingenious scheme of digging under the wall and crafting a tunnel to gain entry into the goblin camp.

My awakening, however, was far from graceful. My limbs were entangled in the makeshift leaf raincoat, and I performed a comical wobble of squirms and wiggles, tripping over my own spindly feet in the process. It was a clumsy spectacle, limbs flailing and me struggling to untangle myself from the leafy mess.

After a series of awkward maneuvers, I finally emerged, victorious and free from the leafy shackles. My triumphant moment was punctuated by a surprise snack - a lingering slug that had sought refuge in the folds of my raincoat. With a delighted grin and a chirpy goblin chuckle, I gobbled down the unexpected treat, savoring the slimy goodness that added a peculiar joy to my chaotic morning.

"Oooooh! Lookie here, a tasty sluggy treat in my leafy coat! Hee-hee! Gobbly-good morning snack, yum-yum! Crunchity munchity!"

I stretched my aching limbs, feeling the renewed energy from the slug feast coursing through my veins. The first light of dawn painted the landscape, and with a cowardly glint in my eyes, I knew it was time to set my plan in motion.

Scuttling toward the edge of the rocky shelter, I looked at the wall that stood between me and the camp. My beady goblin eyes narrowed as I assessed the laborious task before me. The wall stood tall and imposing, but I will do my best. It was time to dig my way in.

My gnarled fingers transformed into makeshift claws as I started to dig into the damp earth beneath the wall. 

"Dig, dig, dig! Make a hole for Hermit, yes! Camp on the other side, need to find Kaka!" I yelled with a toothy grin, flecks of dirt flying in all directions as my spindly fingers furiously dug into the earth.

The soil yielded to my spindly fingers, and I worked tirelessly to create a tunnel, my small form slowly burrowing into the ground. The rhythmic sound of dirt being ousted filled the air as I tunneled beneath the wall.

"Ouch! Rock hard, like goblin head. No matter, keep digging, tunnel to camp!" I chuckled, completely unfazed by the occasional pain of hitting a stubborn rock. 

"Almost there, the wall no match for Hermit! Ha, ha, ha! Dirt in the nose, dirt in the ear, but me not care. Tunnel, tunnel, go under the wall. No more big wall, only dirt goblin way!" I encourage myself to fight off the reality that I barely made any progress.