Why Does The Sun Go On Shining

The bus felt suffocating to Katie in more ways than one.

Looking around at all of these people- hearing them speak- she felt just like Arrow did. All around her were lemmings jumping off a cliff, unknowingly forced by Kidney’s hand. She was getting tired even though she’d been in bed for a few dozen days. …But Frankie was still wide awake.

Something in her said, come on, lay your head down. Rest. Please, please just rest. She saw the pillow that was her little sister’s t-shirt covered shoulder, unobstructed by hair or the strap of a bag… right there, just waiting for her.

She turned up her nose at the idea. She wasn’t going to rest her head on that.

Despite her initial gratitude to her sister, the argument that took them here had been fierce.

“You said “thank you!”

“I didn’t say yes.”

“Why are you suddenly acting like this? Since when was the last time we bickered? Katie, you dragged me out of my freaking bed to bring me outside during the end of the goddamn world, and what did I do? I went right along with it!” She flailed her hands down exasperatedly. The other guests were too distracted by a broken ride for her to feel embarrassed about the fight. “What’s wrong with my idea? Tell me, what’s wrong with that? God knows you could use it.”

“We’ve been there already!” Katie grit her teeth. Why didn’t she understand? How had her sister become so stupid?

“You’re such a child. Such a child. Don’t you wanna go there? It might do something for you!”

“What the hell is it gonna do for me?”

“It worked for me!” The frustrated sister panted. “Come on, Kate. You can pick the next one, alright? I just- think this’d be good for you. We can see her again. Wouldn’t that be nice, Katie? Wouldn’t it be nice if you had someone else to talk to you?

“I talk to you… and… I talk to Mom-“

“You tell Mom how depressed you are in the morning so she can know how hard she has to work that day to repress it. And you hardly paid any attention to Saint. Do you know how highly that kid thinks- that kid thought of you? Cheryl told me he wouldn’t shut up about you! He idolized you! Doesn’t that make you feel anything?”

“…Maybe in another life.”

“We don’t have “another life.”

She seized her big sister’s hand even though everything in her head was suddenly telling her to slap her.

“You can pick the next park.”

“You’ll… go on more than one…?” Katie looked up at her like a baby as she kept her back hunch. “With me…?”

“You’ve made me genuinely fear what might happen if I don’t. You’re welcome.”

Frankie harshly tugged her sister to the bus back to Makoasis where they’d then have to sit in silence for hours.

Katie kept looking over at all the other people. Frankie had bought their tickets with “her” money. To be honest, after all their time together, they’d grown used to sharing a wallet. For a while, they’d only ever grown closer. And now… they were even further apart then when they started this stupid journey.

Katie saw a girl dancing freely down the aisle. A little girl. She looked a lot like how she had at that age, at least how Katie remembered it. She had a Ron Raccoon shirt and a bag with at least thirty pins representing different parks.

Her mom called her over to wipe something off her face. She had two brothers and a sister who were also sitting there. The mother was the only parental figure present, but somehow, she still felt like that girl, and by extension everyone on this bus spare her and her own sister, was more privileged right now than Katie herself had ever been. As privileged as she could be.

All because she hadn’t been told she was going to die this year.