- Aldous Huxley -

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On that hill of grass and flowers, devoid of machines and technology, we both stood looking at one another from no further than 50 feet as the sun beat down its rays upon us. I looked at my brother and my brother looked back. The amount of emotions I felt in those moments was simply inexplicable to the point where even I couldn’t comprehend what I was thinking. It didn’t help that I was at such a young age that even emotions were a complete mystery to me.

I looked at his face, his expression, and I couldn’t comprehend what he was feeling either, however, it seemed somewhat remorseful and full of grief, at least from the memory I’ve been able to remember.

“I told you, I don’t forget dates and times. Still don’t believe me?” he said with a smile on his face.

I didn’t know what to say, I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t say a thing. I wanted to speak, every fiber of my being wanted to say something to him, yet, I could not say a word. My lungs felt as if they wanted to explode and say everything that I wanted to say through the last 2 years since he left us, yet, I could still not bring myself to say anything. My pride wouldn’t let me say a thing.

“Hey Devan, um. I’m, I’m sorry, for everything. I…I wish I could have stayed to see you, I really did. I wouldn’t wish for anything else, I want to be with you guys, I really do, I swear it! But, I’m sorry, damn it, I’m sorry. I…I really do wish I could stay,” he cried out while trying to hold back the tears clearly forming in his eyes.

“Ah, um. I’m uh, I’m sorry Dev it’s just allergies. I’ve been awfully sick lately,” He scratched his nose and put his hands on his face to avoid me seeing.

Even at that age, I could tell those weren’t allergies, it was something else.

When he took his hands off his eyes and the tears seemed to have disappeared I began to walk forward a few steps. I wanted to reach him, I wanted him to be with us.

At some point, I got close enough to see his face perfectly with no tears or sunlight getting in my face. He had baggy eyes, with a dead look in his eyes, yet, he still lived, he still stood before me. “What happened to you?” I thought to myself. I wished to say it out loud but my voice still wouldn’t budge.

“Hey Dev,” he began to speak again as he turned to face me.

“Dev, I can’t be near you guys long but, let’s have lots of fun today. Just like I promised, okay?” he said while putting up the brightest smile he could muster.

Finally, after having been unable to say anything the entire time my body let me speak. But now I realize that I shouldn’t have said a thing. A million thoughts at a time raced through my mind as I tried to speak to him, to tell him everything I wanted to tell him.

“I, you…you,” Say it

“Why, I,” Please say it.

“You,” Please

“How could you, how could you leave us!” No, that wasn’t what I was…please.

“Don’t leave us again! I beg of you!” I yelled out to him.

Before I could think to say anything else I ran to him, to reach him, to hold him, to finally after years be able to embrace my brother. So I ran and ran, and ran until I could finally reach out to him.

However before I can reach him the void returns to take me again, the dark abyss that took all who were unlucky to fall victim to it. The void isn’t as dark as before but it still is on its way to swallow all around it. Something’s wrong, yet I don’t get what. If it swallows everything again then who knows what will happen will I forget this too or will it forever be embedded into my subconscious?

Before I even get a chance to do anything to avoid the incoming darkness I come to realize that it has already swallowed everything whole, but the light returns and I once again reach and reach to take hold of it. I grasped it with my heart and mind and yet again I felt that same sensation, the feeling of the hand, however, this time became more apparent.

The world shapes, deconstructs, and reshapes as I fall deeper down from the abyss to the light that has appeared below me. Sounds and shapes surround me as my world attempts to reconstruct itself. Neon colors cover the dark skies and monotone colors lay out the newly constructed floor below me. Once again that feeling of being nothing but a massless object with weight returns.

I try to turn around to see the light, however, I am unable to move my body. While falling I manage to see the silhouettes of the people I love, people I don’t know, buildings I’ve been to, and buildings I’d never bothered to check with them, everything changes and rebuilds, I try to recollect all the pieces that lie before me but all disappear or reappear before I can.

I close my eyes to try to take everything in and breathe in and out, and as I open my eyes the world returns to its normal state. This time, however, I am no longer on that grassy hill of before but instead in the big city.

Everything is well, everything is fine, this is my safe space. I won’t let anything taint it.

“Sh..shouldn’t we invite big sis too?” I stutter as I look up to ask him.

“Nah, if she were to see me she would kill me,” he said while seemingly genuinely chuckling.

“I don’t think she would kill you. I think she would hug you, lots,” I quietly responded.

“What was that Dev? Sorry I wasn’t able to hear you,” He asked as he crouched down to reach my height.

“Nothing, it’s okay,” I softly replied as I looked over toward the crowds of people around us.

“Hey, is Everstore still open here? I missed going there with you, wanna go? I was thinking of buying some new hoodies so--”

“They aren’t open here…not anymore. They closed a year ago actually.”

“Oh, I…didn’t know. Sorry,” he sighed and looked away.

“It’s fine, there are other toy stores that have opened though! We can go look around for new ones!”

“Yeah…yeah! Alright then, let’s go look around! I’ll make sure to get you something cool.

My emotions were muddled, and thinking straight became harder and harder. He abandoned you. He left you all for someone else. He doesn’t love you. He never did. He didn’t want to be around you. He came back to get something from you. All these thoughts began to race throughout my mind. I needed to think of something else.

I tried to think of something else to think about, something that would be able to distract me from the negativity brewing inside my mind.

Then I looked at the people around me, and a thought began, a thought worth nothing, which would answer nothing but would be able to help me get rid of thoughts I didn’t wish to have.

There in front of us were men and women in suits going to work, other kids my age, and others younger all hanging out with friends and family. So many people with so many different lives, I thought to myself if some have these confusing feelings I felt too. I would never get a response to that question though as they would all remain faceless and colorless in my eyes.

I have always liked thinking, thinking makes me feel happy, and it brings me into a space of my own thoughts where I’m in control, at least most of the time. Even if I think of the stupidest of things I can’t help but think.

As I looked up to the sky which was as bright as a diamond and the high-rises towered over us as we walked towards the nearby figure store.

It wasn’t all that far away, however, the amount of people out here with us was massive and the traffic made it hard to go to the sidewalks we needed to go to. Presumably, because of this we stopped by a nearby arcade which my brother used to go to when he was younger alongside his friends. When we were younger, he had always told me stories about how his “homies” and himself used to “hang” around there for hours on end after school and spent most of their time and allowances on getting as many prizes and high scores as possible.

I quietly chuckled as I thought about how much different he was and how much his way of speaking had altered throughout the time we were separate.

“You’ve changed, like a lot lot. You know that?” I have to increase the sound of my voice so he can hear me through the phone calls and chitter-chatter going around us.

“I mean, I wouldn’t say I’m all too different. Right?” The worry in his voice was still the same as before, I guess in a way he was right.

“But I mean, I guess I did change a bit,” His tone of voice changes and becomes less energetic and more soft yet still is able to speak loud enough for me to hear.

“I guess after everything that has happened I was kinda forced to grow up. I just wish it didn’t have to be that way.”

I had no response. That phrase of ‘have to be that way’, I hate it, I hate it so much. I don’t get it, some stupid job shouldn’t have to separate us to the point that he rarely contacts us, it's so dumb so dumb! I thought to myself as my emotions began to resurface.

Before any tears could come out I rubbed my eyes for around two seconds and reopened them to see that Adam was no longer next to me but instead a bunch of faceless strangers, some looking at me and some minding their own business.

“Dev! Um, excuse me!” he said as he walked past the crowd of people in between him and me.

“Adam!, Ow!” I squealed after having been aggressively bumped into by the mass of people around me.

I tried my hardest to get past the large crowd of people that had separated us from one another but it seemed like no matter how much I tried to move, someone else would already be there walking in front.

Soon, gasps and screams began to come from the crowd and the faceless people around me began running and bumping into one another.

A large man in a suit then ran straight into me, knocking me down on my back, the man didn’t even bother to check on me, no I’m sorry, nothing.

No one helped me get up, not a single person even stopped to look down on me, the shoes of strangers all stepped across every inch of my body as I cried out to them.

I wanted to cry and cry my eyes out but I knew I had to be strong. I had to get up, I had to spend as much time as I possibly could with Adam, and then, maybe this time, he wouldn’t leave me alone.

Then, before I could fully get up and regain my balance I heard a loud sound which I could only describe as the screeching of tires.

SCREEEAACHHH!

“DEVAN!”

I turned to look where the direction of the voice was coming from before I heard the screeching become louder and louder. The remaining crowd near me began to scatter away from the area all in mass as if running away from something that threatened their existence.

“Devan! Watch out!” As I looked towards the road I saw a pair of lights approaching me.

Those pair of lights soon became one light as the vehicle quickly approached me.

SCRRAAAAAPE!

QUABANG!

THUD!

I couldn’t open my eyes, and I couldn’t move a muscle, it was almost as if I had been shot by a tranquilizer, but the one who shot it was myself.

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

The sounds of a car alarm next to me blared through the vicinity.

BEEP! BEEP! BEEP! BEEP!

I couldn’t move, I didn’t want to open my eyes, no matter what I did not want to see anything at all, not until I heard it, not until I heard his voice.

“Please, please, please, Adam, Jessica, Mom, Dad, anyone!” I thought to myself in my mind as I kept my eyes as shut as I possibly could.

“Oh my god!”

“Somebody call 911 hurry!”

“Holy sh…”

“There’s two boys over there! Someone get to them.”

“Hello! There’s been a crash! There’s a kid, god please help them!”

“Hey, kid! Kid! Shit, someone get over here and help me get them.”

The screams of the same women and men from earlier went all to my death ears as none of their voices were his. I ignored them all, I didn’t respond to any and I just looked into the terrifying void in my eyes.

“Devan… Dev! Devan!” the voice stood out from the rest of them. It was a familiar one, one that brought peace to my very soul.”

“Holy shit, shit, shit, she’s dead! Hey someone’s dead, call the ambulance!”

WEE-WOO! WEE-WOO!

The sounds of sirens rang from nearby and got louder and louder as the seconds went by.

“Open your eyes kid! Open them, please! a woman’s voice pierced my ears.

“Is he breathing? Is that kid okay?”

“Yeah, he’s breathing very heavily, he’s still with us!” she replied.

I opened my eyes to see the woman and a young man next to her.

“Devan oh my god! You're alive! Thank god!” the young man said as he embraced me in his arms.

It didn’t even take a second of being in his arms for me to realize it was him, it was Adam. He was okay, he was okay. He moved me in front of him yet kept holding the sides of my arms. I tried to speak but I couldn’t say a thing, I thought I wouldn’t say a thing.

“Adam. I’m scared. Adam! I wanna go home!” I said as I began to wail and cry

“We have a fatality, likely died after getting hit by the car. What?”

I looked behind me to see a man dressed in all blue standing above the body of a woman who was lying with her back on the floor in a pool of red.

Her face was slightly mangled and the red liquid spewed from it and different parts of her body. Her left arm was twisted around about 180 degrees while the rest of her arm had tears all over it, the other side of her body was left almost unharmed with barely any scrapes or injuries to be seen. Despite it happening so long ago I still remember her lifeless face, a face of not terror but shock. The rest of her corpse in comparison was a bit of a fog but her face hadn’t left my mind. The site of her body made me want to puke so badly that my stomach began to hurt. I wasn’t able to hold it back much longer and eventually my breakfast all came back out.

My mouth felt hot and my breathing became erratic as I emptied the contents of my stomach onto the now bloodied road.

As the seconds went by my visions also became blurrier and blurrier as my heart raced and raced faster and faster to the point that I could swear everyone could hear it.

“Devan! Come on, we need to go! Now!” Adam yelled as he grabbed my arms and attempted to lift me up but to no avail.

“Shit, hey! Get that kid out of here!”

“I know! Hey, Devan, look at me, please. It’s dangerous here, we need to leave or else we won’t be safe. I need to get you back to our sister okay?”

“What about you? You… you're coming too…right?”

“I can’t come with you, if I do, then this time I won’t be able to save you.”

“You…saved…me?”

That’s right, now that I think about it again, it should have absolutely hit me. That car was going too fast, there was no way it could have missed me, it had to have hit something and redirected it. It was possible that he had just jumped onto me and moved us both out of the direction of the car.

Yeah, since he wasn’t near me when I was on the floor there was no way he did that. Did the woman save me? No, that wasn’t possible either. Maybe she jumped in front of the car? No, no! What the hell am I thinking, she wouldn’t have had the time to see, would she?

Her reaction time would have to have been massive for her to see both the car and me plus having the bravery to take the hit instead. It was possible but even still, something felt wrong with that answer.

“Damn it, Devan!” He yelled out to break me out of my trance.

“I…”

QUABAMM!

I turned back towards the explosion to see where the car should have been, an enormous mix of black and gray flames coming from the dance of a red and orange blaze.

BANG! BANG!

Shots rang from the store to the right of us.

“Shit, no no! It wasn’t… Shit,” Adam said to himself as he looked down at his watch on his right arm.

“Adam? Adam!”

“Let’s go!” he said as he grabbed me by my arm.

BANG! BANG! BANG!

The screams of men, women, and children began once again as the gunshots continued to ring out in the sky.

I didn’t understand, I couldn’t comprehend what was happening. We ran and ran away from the danger that was surrounding us more and more and I didn’t even know it but I looked into his eyes to see that he too was panicked yet somehow calm.

“Adam! What’s, What's going on!”

“Just keep running! Don’t stop running!”

BANG! BANG!

BAM!

Gunshots, explosions, and the cries of the living continued to ring on throughout the entire city. No matter where we ran the danger seemed to continue to encircle us and we would be unable to escape.

“Adam! Why, why don’t we hide in a building?”

“No! If we get enclosed we will die Devan!”

“No, we won’t! Not if we are with others! Safety in numbers!”

“No, no, you don’t understand! If we get enclosed our fate will be set!”

“What are you talking about!”

BAM!

BAM!

“Please! We need to find others, we’ll…we’ll die!” I screamed out in pure terror.

“Please, please, I beg of you!”

I pleaded and pleaded for him to listen to me but his expression continued to be one of pure agony and what seemed like pity. His eyes were barely open and I could tell he was moments from crying as his eyes sparkled.”

“Listen to me Devan, we can’t get cornered! If we do, there is no way we can escape if we are trapped by debris or by whoever is causing this.”

“Debris? What’s th--”

BOOM!

“Watch out!” Adama screamed at me as he grabbed me and jumped out of the way of the debris that was about to fall on us.

Soon the building would come tumbling down as well and we noticed the building tilt.

“Shit..shit! Run!” he said as he held on extremely tight to my wrist.

“Ow!”

BAM!

A second explosion rang throughout the highrise above us.
CRASH!

A pole alongside a bunch of wires landed near us with the latter getting tangled onto our bodies.

“Damn it!”

I couldn’t cry any longer, all I could think about was living, I had to run or else I would never be allowed to cry out these sorrows ever again.

As we turned the corner of the street we saw that the buildings ahead of us were completely engulfed in flames and bodies accompanied by blood pools were scattered across the roads and buildings.

As we ran I could see their deformed features and terrified expressions, at least of those who still had their skin and heads intact. Cars were left abandoned and those who remained scattered across the streets and buildings all looking for safety from the unfolding tragedy.

I tried calming myself down but yet again my heart continued to race as my palms became more and more sweaty.

“Shit, shit, shit! What the fuck is going on! This is what we are supposed to run from?”

We stop in the middle of the road and take in the despair-inducing scenery before us.

As I looked at the chaos ensuing across the entire city I could swear that in the flames of a nearby flower shop, I could see the silhouette of something large, something inhuman rising from the fire. That wasn’t the only place, in the other scorching fires more of the silhouettes rose from the floor and moved in the buildings. Some had an outrageous amount of what seemed like limbs and mouths as big as the dinosaurs in the movies I had watched.

Through one of the openings in the fire, I swear I could see what looked like an outrageously large, rotten arm filled with lumps reaching out towards what looked like a woman on the floor.

Chills ran through my entire body and my heart felt like it was about to explode and my eyes began to water yet again. The shadows grew larger and larger as the fires rose to the heights of high-rise buildings and we could do nothing but stare at the tragedy in front of us.

Then through the screams, explosions, and flames, a sound echoed seemingly through the entire city and through the inside of my skull. It jumbled and stumbled across it and then a splitting pain rushed through every inch of my head, a pain that I can only guess is like being stabbed. The sound was that of a melody, a sound that I could only describe as a mix of a whistle and a hum that sent seemingly permanent chills down my spine. The pain went down to my stomach turning it into a spiral. Looking into the flames increased my pain and made breathing a seemingly impossible task. All of my senses told me to run, my eyes staring at the shadow coming from the fire and flames. As the darkness encircled us my mind raced with the same thought over and over again.

As the seconds went by the sound became more and more clear. It wasn’t just a hum or a whistle, it was a song. Someone was singing, but the sound was not something a single human could make, it had to be multiple people creating the melody, it just simply wasn’t possible for it to be one, yet, it all sounded almost as if it was coming from the same source, it seemed like the skies themselves were creating the melody. Despite how much of an effect it had on me I for the life of me cannot seem to recall how it went.

Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run.

I could think of nothing else but the immediate need to run away.

Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run. Run.

KABLOOM!

The blast managed to awaken me from my trance and brought me back to my proper sense of mind.

“What is this…”

I looked over at Adam to tell him that we had to keep running but his eyes were almost as empty as the void of space. It was almost as if his soul had given up control of his body and abandoned it alongside me.

“Adam. Adam! Adam! We need to leave, now!”

No matter how much I yelled out to him his expression wouldn’t change, the expression on his face was that of utter despair.

I eventually decided to give up on this method as it wasn’t doing anything and instead stood on my tippy toes and slapped him across the face as hard as I could.

“Adam! Dammit, we need to go! Please!” I yelled out in a final attempt to get through to him.

“Wha…shit, shit, shit!” He said as he grabbed my left hand with his right.

The sound engulfed us no matter where we ran, be it past the burning buildings or the smoke-filled streets.

More gunshots rang in front of us as the screams of people followed.

Then through the chaos, I could hear people talk over one another.

“There is a monster!”

“Monster!”

“Someone save us!”

“Everyone run!”

“Through here!” Adam yelled out as he brought me over to a nearby clothing store.

Thankfully it didn’t seem like it was part of the chaos yet as others were inside all scared for their lives.

“Close the gate!” a well-dressed man yelled out.

“How do you? Is there like a button to close it somewhere?”

“Shit, who here knows?” the well-dressed man said.

“It doesn’t work! Barricade the gate before anyone or anything else gets in!”

“Ah fuck this!”

“Oi! Get the carts at the front!”

“Run!”

“AH!”

BAM!

This time the explosion was close, and flames closed all of our surroundings. Scraps of metal flung through the entire front of the store.

When I got up an almost unbearable amount of pain coursed through my body and the red liquid I had first seen from the woman now was splattered across the floor of the front entrance.

The screams began again and as I regained my vision I looked dead ahead at the entrance which was now covered in smoke. Then a shadow formed in the smoke that was created after the blue vehicle’s explosion which had crashed into the buildings at full force. What came out of that smoke was a creature beyond human imagination, its aura was that of the void of nothingness itself and its stench was that of a mountain of rotting corpses, a smell which I was slowly growing used to.

Its limbs were uncountable as they seemed to move in and out and around its body which could be seen wiggling inside it. Each of its “limbs” were around a human leg’s length and what I thought were its fingers were a mix between actual fingers and claws, not nails, full-blown razor claws. Its claws were a mess, some torn, presumably during scuffles.

However, the thing that they all had in common was the blood on them, blood which surely belonged to the same owners of the screams outside.

The more I analyzed it the more my mind began fading away. If I didn’t look away soon, I was sure to go mad.

I looked up to the top of the creature to see a caricature of a face. Honestly, I don’t think I can describe what I had seen, my mind refused to fully recall it. But I must remember, I must picture it, I must remember it, that face, this creature it was something that should not have ever existed in our world, something humanity should never have been allowed to witness. Just standing here being a witness to this was enough to make me want to tear my soul out of my body. I wanted to run, I wanted to look away, but I was completely enthralled by its appearance. Something about it wouldn’t let me look away, I couldn’t and still can’t tell if that was due to the monster’s influence or my very own mind. Even still, I analyzed every part of it. I had to, I had no choice, I was a witness and I believed I would soon die as a martyr.

Its limbs and what seemed like a head were connected to what seemed like a mix of red and pink mass which looked like muscles and tissue yet it was darker than it should have been, at least compared to us. There was another color on it though, a color which was not dark yet not light, a color which even now I haven’t seen before.

Due to its “skin” or “flesh” or whatever the hell it was, it was transparent enough that its organs were visible for everyone to see and were all being covered by a transparent black mass just like the rest of its body.

Despite all of its horrific features, the strangest thing about it was that face. It changed expressions every couple of seconds that I looked at it. At first, it seemed to be wearing a crooked smile, not one that’s human but one of something trying to imitate a human smiling. Next, it would contort its flesh or whatever and then seemingly frowned as it stared at its victims who were either paralyzed in fear or running away. The more I stared at it the more details I seemed to notice, but in the end, no matter how hard I tried I could not comprehend what it was feeling. It then opened its mouth in less than a millisecond and inside of the abyss of its gaping mouth I swear I could see that it was filled with mixed faces and limbs of all shapes and sizes, some small and some adult sized all belonging to seemingly all ages. Some had their mouths open and some had their eyes closed, it was almost as if I was looking at the last moments of someone’s life.

If one were to try to depict my measly description of the creature before me, it would be a disgraceful representation of it. Even despite its appearance being etched into my mind I still can’t seem to find a way to fully describe it. I’m beyond sure that not even the greatest of writers could be able to put into words what I saw and not even the greatest artists could render the figure before us. This thing was not just a mockery, but an ineffable mockery of all imagination. If I didn’t know any better, I would have believed that I had been infused with a mix of every single drug to be conceived by man.

This thing should not exist.

It’s a mockery, a mockery of nature.

I dropped to my knees as my eyes laid, unblinking, at the mass of despair before me. But within the deep recesses of my mind, a thought began.

And at that moment, an eternal fear began flourishing in my mind, one which would remain for an eternity.

Run

A singular thought.

Run

One which would soon envelop my entire mind, just like before.

Looking at this creature, this thing, made me cry at the sight of it. I could do nothing as my limbs refused to move and my eyes wouldn’t dare look away, even still that singular thought raced through my mind and would not stop, but this time it echoed on and on and became louder and louder.

RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN

Surely since we had seen it, the only fate left for us was death.

I could only guess that everyone else was thinking the same.

We were all martyrs and our executioner laid before us, ax in hand as it looked down on us from its throne of misery.

In those moments, I gave up on my life for the sake of something beyond me.

“DEVAN!” a voice ignited a spark in my heart.

Before I could stick around and find out what was going to happen next Adam grabbed my arm and we once again began running, this time though we went towards the back of the store to get away from whatever the hell that thing was.

“AH!”

Screamed echoed through the building yet I could not hear anyone plea, just scream in agony. It was almost as if they had to give up, just like me.

Soon others followed behind as they screamed but the sounds of plashing and bodies hitting things overtook their voices. At this point, we could only pray that there was a backdoor which we could escape to.

RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN

It continued to race through my mind.

RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN

My heart raced faster and faster.

RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN

My stomach continued to twirl and twist as something in my throat ran up and down continuously.

RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN

Please.

RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN

Let me escape.

RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN

Let me live.

RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN RUN

I DON’T WANT TO DIE

Finally, as we made it towards the left end side of the store we found a pair of doors that led to the outside, it was our salvation.

“Through here! We’ll be safe, I swear we will be safe!”

As we ran outside I closed the door shut behind us before looking over at Adam with tears in my eyes to see that he was no longer there. His face was pale and his eyes were devoid of light. He let go of my hands and dropped to his knees and when I thought he would begin to cry he instead laughed to himself.

I noticed that he was looking towards the end of the alleyway we were in and so I looked over as well to see what he was seeing.

That was when I realized why he had seemingly devoid himself of hope.

The alleyway we were in had only one exit.

And in that exit, there was a figure, clad in all black standing there, the aura of death surrounding it with the stench of the dead engulfing our nostrils.

That was when I realized the truth behind our predicament and the story.

The woman in the story didn’t see the man who had nearly ruined her life in that gas station. The figure who killed her over and over again in her dreams may have been him but on that day she truly faced her demise that wasn’t him.

On that day that woman had stared at the abyss, and in return, it had stared back.

The thing that killed that woman, the thing that killed my brother, the thing that continues to take everything away from me, and the thing that’s after me, is death itself.

“Forgive me….”

Then the dance of angels began as my life flashed before my eyes. Then, when all was said and done my fate was forever changed and the devil’s game began once again.

DING! DONG! DING! DONG!

The ringing comes from a nearby speaker system and rings throughout the entire building I now find myself in. Then, a voice rang out from the intercom that rests at the top of the classroom’s whiteboard.

“To those who lie awake to experience hell itself, do not be afraid. Happy hunting to those who chase after those who run from fate, and goodbye to today’s victims. Run as fast as you can, be the fools who saved the damned or the damned who slayed the fools and seize the day! I wish the best for any and all.”

The voice sounded like a mix of a human yet sounded semi-robotic. The very sound of the person’s voice, no, the thing’s voice brought chills down my spine and a sense of unease enveloped me.

I’m currently situated in a dark classroom only lit by the moon coming from the hallway’s windows on my left.

I take a deep breath before analyzing my surroundings. I see that I’m seated on a wooden chair in a row of chairs and desks and to my left the door is wide open for anyone to leave or enter from. I observed the classroom is devoid of sound.

“Where am I?”

I walk outside the classroom and arrive at the hallway filled with moonlight. I look to the left and the right and see no one, this place is completely devoid of all life and yet I stand here. The only way I can describe the feeling of being here is pure nostalgia, it is almost as if I had jumped into those pictures of liminal spaces.

I look down the hallway to see what class I’m in and it says, “2-D” I’m at the very end of the hallway where the last class for Sophomores is, and next to it on my right is a stairway up and down while on my left are the rest of the classrooms and likely other differing rooms.

I take notice that all the doors to all the rooms are open, all but one. I walk up to it and read the sign out loud.

“Teacher Faculty Room” I whisper to myself.

I gently open the door.

Then I met face-to-face with death.

Inside the room lay a small mountain of corpses in the middle and the furniture all destroyed and moved around the room.

The stench of blood and rotting is inescapable and the sight is nothing but horrid. Within the corpses, something inside moves and then reaches out. My heart races as I run down the hall.

THUMP!

I am suddenly thrown down on the floor and find myself in one of the classrooms. I try to scream yet nothing comes out.

Someone is covering my mouth with their rough yet warm right hand and is pulling me behind the teacher’s desk in the corner of the classroom with their left.

I hit and punch at the arm and try to bite but nothing works.

I can’t escape their grasp.

Nothing I do will--

Then, I hear my assailant’s voice.

“SHHHH! Be quiet! If it hears you we’re dead!” a girl whispers loudly next to my ear.

I look up at the girly tomboy who had dragged me here with a look of confusion which she seems to notice.

“Who are… how did…to…you”

“Why the confusion? Do you not remember what we just saw?”

“I saw something?”

“Those things that came from the fog! Those fucks, they…god damn it, we’re all fucked. They killed him! They tore them all apart. I tried…damn it I tried so damn hard!” the more she speaks the more and more her composure begins to fall, and eventually, tears begin to form and then fall from her eyes.

“They killed us all, I don’t know what’s going on, one day we are all together having fun, and the next all of us are dead. Just what did we do to deserve this hell? I don’t get it, I DON’T!” she yells out as she bends down and falls to her knees before she begins to violently pull on her short, unkempt hair.

“Hey…what…”

I wonder if this is another vision, maybe, my ability evolved, maybe…no, this doesn’t make any sense, that wouldn’t make any sense. Why would it change? There’s nothing that would have prompted it, right? It has to be a dream, but…

I crouch down to the girl and attempt to get her to calm down, if I want to understand what predicament I’m in then I need to get information out of her before whatever this is ends.

“I…what is this? I don’t dream, I’ve never been here, yet, it seems…I’m scared. What is this?”

“What are you… Look, I don’t know what’s going on but, ah shit! Shh.” she covered my mouth and her own and ducked herself under the table completely so nothing could see her.

THUMP!
THUMP!
THUMP!

Something entered the room.

THUMP!
THUMP!
THUMP!

Its heavy footsteps are going around the entire room.

THUMP!
THUMP!
THUMP!

It's going to find us eventually

THUMP!
THUMP!
THUMP!

Are we going to die?

THUMP!
THUMP!
THUMP!

The girl grabs a nearby metal ruler and stapler on the floor through a mess of items and prepares to attack whatever is approaching.

Even while watching I still can’t move, I can’t do anything. We are going to die no matter what. No, if I live, she is going to die. I have to die. But, I don’t want to die. I don’t want to die.

Then the footsteps start approaching the desk we are hiding under and eventually stop at the desk.

“RAAAGHH!” the girl screams out as she lunges at the figure standing above us.

“Ahh!!” a man yells out.

“WAIT!”

Is she going to die? Am I going to die? By doing nothing did I save myself and doom her? Did I get someone else killed? I’m sorry, I’m sorry, I’m sorry.

“Mister? Oh shit! Shit! I'm so sorry!”

Mister? Oh, wait a second, I recognize his face, that scar on his cheek, I remember him, he was one of the teachers I talked to on ‘Greet The Teacher Night’. Wait, that means, this school, this school is…

“Ah, oh man. You really did a number on my arm huh?” Mr. Williams says as he looks at the blood coming from his forearm.

“Ah, shit teach, I’m so sorry! I thought you were that thing, ahh! I’m sorry!”

“It’s alright, just a small injury, it doesn’t even hurt, see?” he says as he shows his now barely visible injury.

“Thank god, I’m glad you're alright, I wouldn’t have forgiven myself if I had hit somewhere else. AH, this is so fucked. Sorry for the crude language but fuck!”

“It’s alright, I think cursing is the least of our problems now,”

“Yeah, right.”

“Wha…”

The other two stare at me with puzzled expressions.

“Oh, Devan,”

“Huh?”

“I’m glad you're doing alright too,” the man says to me with an apprehensive look.

“Thank you, Mr…”

What was his name again? I can’t seem to recall it. Is it because this is a dream? Wait, if I’m lucid dreaming, then wouldn’t I be able to control this? So why do I feel so…powerless?

I stare puzzled into space as I try to comprehend just what I am witnessing. This dream is strange, maybe it’s just because I haven’t properly dreamt but this isn’t normal. It can’t be, this feels too real. This seems…

“AAAAAAAHHHHHH!”

A scream echoes out from the end of the hallway.

“Shit, someone’s in trouble. Hey teach, do we go help them?” she asks as she turns towards him.

“We can't, it's too dangerous, do you remember what you saw?”

The man’s face drops and turns pale after hearing the scream.

“Ah but--”

“No is no! I won’t risk your lives!”

“But, fuck. Hey, Devan! What do you think?”

Devan? How does she know my name? Actually, now that I think about it, do I know her name?

BANG!

SQUEEARCCCACACACA!

A loud banging sound alongside an unintelligible screech echoed through the hallway.

“Fuck it, I won’t let someone else die, no more deaths! Be the fools who saved the damned right? Yeah, yeah! I’m going, sorry teach!” she says with a large worried grin.

One would think that nothing could scare her, but the sweat coming from her forehead and the twitching of her confident smile would prove otherwise.

“Wait! Please don’t you, don’t you dare!”

She then ran out without looking back in the direction where the sounds of screaming and crying came from. I look over at the teacher who desperately calls out to her before following her. This has to be a dream, it just has to be so no matter what happens no one will actually die, right?

With this conviction, I run towards her direction and find her looking into a classroom with blood coming from the open doorway.

“Holy, hey! Are you alright? Where does it hurt?” she asks as she bends down.

When I get next to her I see someone our age on the floor with blood coming from his stomach. Something did this to him, something which is still lurking in the halls looking for victims. Looking for us. I need to run, run, run, run.

“I…don’t…”

“It’s okay, don’t use any more of your energy, I see…oh my god,” she says as she notices the large bloody gap that ripped open his buttoned-up shirt and fleshy stomach.

“Oh my god. What the hell? I’m so sorry…” she says as she puts her hands over her mouth.

The sight of the gap makes me want to throw up but yet nothing comes out.

“Don’t…do…” his dying words then start to come out.

“Don’t what?” she asks.

THUMP

THUMP

THUMP

“Trw…tra…”

THUMP!
THUMP!
THUMP!

“behi--”

SHLUK!

“Ah…aa…ah..you…”

PLSHH!

“AHHG!” she yells out as the knife is taken out of her throat.

I stare in anguish as I see blood begin to splurt out from my friend’s neck onto the walls and floor of the hallway.

“De..va…n…raa.ru…run!”

As she lets out her last words she turns to attack her assailant only to see the remnants of what may have been once a human man.

“Ag…ga!”

“SGRAAAAQ!”

She manages to hit it with the ruler in its left eye which makes it scream out. Its scream is one I have never heard before, it is almost as if a goat, hyena, and woman were given the same voice, screaming in anguish of being trapped in the same body.

If this is a dream, no, this is a dream, but this feels too real. It has to be a dream and my mind has created an unbelievable horror. One that does not pale in comparison to any horror horror movie. I continue to stare at the girl as she violently shakes, yet she manages to stop the shaking and begins to regain her composure.

“I..I…he--

“R..u..nn, De.nv.”

She looks at me one last time before dropping to the floor with her eyes wide open, now completely devoid of life.

Seeing her drop to the floor awakened that same reaction as all those other times.

The immediate need to run infiltrates and stays in my mind as I look at her now lifeless body, a body that belonged to a girl who used her last moments to defeat the assailant who threatened not only her life but mine. A failed final attempt at saving someone.

Someone else has died because of my incompetence, because of my ignorance.

Just how many more times must I see this again?

How many times will I let people down, how many more times will I let people die?

I’m useless, all I do is bring pain and suffering to others.

If she never saw me then she wouldn’t have died.

I wonder if I had just gone by myself would she have lived?

I wonder, I wonder, why did I, why am I, I’m sorry.

I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry. I’m sorry.

I'm truly sorry.

Please, please…I beg of you, forgive me.

Wait…you’re…

My mind becomes an endless pit of insults as I look down upon her body and the mockery of humanity before me.

“Breathe, breathe,”

I fight to regain my composure and unfreeze my trembling legs as I prepare to run away. I’m running away again, aren’t I? I quickly turn as fast as I can and the void of emptiness begins to envelop the hallway before me.

From that void, I finally for the first time in years, meet eyes with those who keep watching me. I see who the hands belong to. In between the abyss where the eyes watch and the arms reach, there is a mirror, and within that mirror, I see no reflection.

I turn back behind me to see the man with crazed eyes running towards me at seemingly his full speed. He is no longer human but something out of this world, like something had taken hold of his body. His head twitches from side to side yet always keeps his head and sights directly on me like an owl and the grin on its face is unproportional to any human on the planet.

No disease, malformation, or any natural thing could possibly create that face. There exists no world where nature would be able to create it, everything about it was beyond human or nature’s understanding. Its very existence is an anomaly, an organic anomaly.

It reaches out its lengthy yet malnourished arms at me. One of its hands missing two fingers, and the other’s fingers are all misshapen, just like the rest of its hideous body.

I walk backward where the void is approaching as my sight becomes blurry yet again. I blink fast and try to readjust my vision.

Once I finally regain my sight, the beast opens up its smile where inside I can see another pair of eyes, and before I can even think of anything else a pair of dark silhouettes resembling arms come out of its gaping void of a mouth in an attempt to reach me.

As it reaches towards me with all four of its hands, I take a final step back and fall yet again into the endless void.

The monster makes that same terrifying sound as before and lunges forward at me from the floor to the abyss.

It reached its arms towards me and they began to expand, with the crackling and reconstruction of its bones allowing it to increase its reach further and further. The sounds and sight of it all bring me to tears. Not only that, but it’s getting closer and closer, now to the point where it is mere inches away from my face. In a few seconds, it will finally reach me and I will succumb to its bloodlust.

No, I…I can’t die here, I can’t let it catch me, I refuse to die!

No..no. Someone, somebody please…save me. I beg of you, I…I…I’m powerless. I can’t--

I don’t want to die.

“BZZZT”

“AH!!”

The loud sound of my alarm wakes me from my nightmare and I find myself under a familiar roof. I gasp out for air again and again as if I had sprinted a mile and then quickly get up from my bed and get my phone from the nightstand and look at the time.

7:30 A.M

“Ahhh.. Missed almost all of them again huh?”

I put in my password then promptly turn off all the other alarms till eight so that I won’t have to keep dismissing them over and over again.

I then lay my phone back down and look inside Mirai’s cage to see that she is okay before taking off the cover on it. After having seen that she is okay I finally take a deep breath, take a seat on my bed, and let out a long sigh of relief while wearing a smile on my face.

“It’s been a while since I’ve had any kind of dream. Man…maybe it should have stayed that way huh?” I say to myself before preparing for the new day.

I look at the clock once again, take a good look at my surroundings, stretch out my arms, and get up from my bed.

I look at the cage and lift the blanket covering it to see Mirai getting up from her seemingly deep sleep.

One of her eyes is closed and she has a hard time opening it, likely due to having been asleep for so long. When she can open it she stretches and yaws at the same before looking at me and meowing lightly.

“Good morning Mirai, have a nice sleep?”

She doesn’t reply and instead jumps down to the bottom where the gate is.

“Alright, here you go.” I softly say as I open the gate for her to go out.

“Meww!”

She runs out of the cage and flops on the floor in the middle of the room.

“Somebody wants pets huh?” I say as I sit down next to her and begin to scratch her back.

“Hey, no matter what happens, I’ll make sure you’re safe, okay Mirai?”

She doesn’t respond and instead stretches on the floor as she purrs.

“Awww! You’re a little cutie aren’t you?”

I laugh as she rolls around the floor while stretching. Before I get too distracted I take a look at my phone to see I don’t have a whole lot of time left to prepare for school.

Alright, your bowls are mostly full so I won’t have to put anymore for now--” I yawn before I can finish my sentence.

I go outside into the hallway and enter the bathroom. I look in the mirror to see my reflection. I’m still here, I’m still alive, I’m still me.

“I…” I don’t finish talking and instead turn on the faucet and wash my face with the cold water to finish waking me up.

I look back up to my reflection and turn off the light before leaving the room. As I walk down the hallway to the kitchen I take notice that I’m not hungry, my appetite has been destroyed, likely by that nightmare.

I remember it all very vividly, the screams, the monsters, and… Who, who were they? Oh wait, could it have been? Whatever.” I don’t finish my thought and instead decide to think about something else.

“Meww!” Mirai meows as she walks next to me back towards my room.

I then take a few minutes to put on my clothes, deodorant, and shoes before knocking on Lio’s door in order to warn him that in 30 minutes he will have to go to work.

“Lio! Daytime, you gotta start preparing for work.”

“Auuwaa!” his yawns have never been quiet, I don’t think it’s physically possible for him.

“Alright, thanks Devan, I’ll be out soon. You walking to school or do you want me to drive you over?” He slowly asks.

“Um, I’ll just walk, I need some sunlight right now.”

“Alright, just be careful.”

“I know. I know. Thanks for asking.”

“Sure, Love you.”

“Love you too. Oh, before I forget, last night did you hear anything weird? I think the TV somehow turned on and I was wondering if it was you.”

“I mean…I don’t think I sleepwalk. Honestly, you were probably just dreaming.”

Dreaming huh? Could that have been it?

“Ah, alright. Well, see you later! I’m gonna get my stuff and head out,” I say as I walk back to my room.

I go to the side of my room where a wooden desk is to unplug my laptop, put it in my backpack, and then grab it alongside my earbud case, pencils, and blue notebook. I stuff them all into my backpack without much care and close it. Before leaving, I go back into the bathroom and brush my teeth for around three minutes before turning off the lights to my room, and bathroom.

I go out towards the front door and before I open the door I look up at the bright sky and begin to think to myself.

Will I continue?

Just how much longer can I keep this up?

Should I give up? This is just an endless fight that I am destined to lose in the end.

No, I have to live. I won’t allow myself to die like this.

If I am to die, it will be of my very own accord, not one that is predetermined.

I refuse to die today or any day shortly, no matter how many times I must resist death.

I close the door behind it and lock it with my yellow key before giving one last glance at my home. I look at it and imagine that they are all in the living room window, waving at me. All wishing me the best of days possible for the coming future. All of them with wide smiles on their faces, all of them, including my siblings too.

“See you later,” I sadly say as I wave before making my way towards the school building.