Prejudice and more Prejudice

“You need help?” I ask Daitan, trying not to sound condescending.

“No,” Daitan says, getting up slowly.

“So, you want to explain why you were purging,” I say.

“I WAS NOT PURGING” Daitan yells.

I think to myself “It really is harder to give therapy when the person doesn't want therapy”.

“Ok fine,” she says “Me and Anton like Anime, laugh at me later”.

One way of lying, admitting to a smaller thing, covering up the real thing. I'll give it an 8/10.

I look at her the same way I did to Jiro yesterday but she seems unfazed by it, instead saying “Anyways we should get back to the fireworks”.

Another way of lying is to distract, risky though 7/10, needs effort.

“Nah let's talk instead, I say “You’re doing this to get slimmer”.

“Shut up” Daitan retorts “It's nothing like that I'm just-”

“Being normal?” I guess correctly.

She stammers a bit before saying “It’s called self improvement”,

“Have you seen any improvement?” I ask.

“Well, no” She admits “But it’s a process, and I’ve just gotten started”.

I’m about to say something along the lines of “When did you start” when Daitan just walks away.

“I’ll tell Anton” I blurt out, then muttering to myself “Why am I like this?”.

“OMG FRICK YOU” Daitan shouts out.

“Fair,” I mutter.

“YOU KNOW WHAT,” Daitan continues, shouting right in my face “WHY ARE YOU EVEN HERE”.

I don’t really know how to reply so I just stay silent as Daitan continues, “You know what I think? Back at the car, that wasn't an accident, you did all of this with a reason”.

“That is technically true,” I think to myself.

“SO YOU ADMIT IT?” she shouts, making me instantly realize that I accidentally said it instead of just thinking it.

“And what do you mean by technically true?” She asks.

I realize that this is going to take a lot of finagling to get out of this situation.

I start with-

“Oh so you’re just gonna make an excuse” she interrupts before I can say anything “What is it? Will you say that it was all for good? Will you say that it had to happen?”.

I admit to myself, making sure that I just think it and not saying it out loud, that all of those would be excuses I would make.

Then it all clicks.

“Who was it previously?” I ask.

“Huh?” she reacts.

“Let’s talk about you now,” I say, now condescendingly “You had a boyfriend, but you caught him cheating on you with someone that you thought was more beautiful than you”.

“Wait what?” She questions as she steps back “How did you know that?”.

“You took it personally and started to try to make yourself slimmer but never saw an improvement, so you stopped eating and started to purge,” I say.

“And for how I know that is cause I'm observant,” I say “ which Jiro would say makes me a psychic”.

Daitan gives me the same look that you would give your therapist if he laughs at your mental illness, which is kinda true.

I sigh “Look, you should be you, not what society wants,” I say.

“It is what I want!” Daitan exclaims.

“Is it?” I ask.

She stutters a little bit, before finally sitting down on the couch and saying “Yeah you’re right”.

“Look, I probably don’t know everything,” I say, emphasizing everything “Like I don't know how hard it is to be a streamer, especially a successful streamer”.

“Yea” Daitan says “It is hard”.

“But” She continues, leaning on the nearby wall “It’s a nice ego boost every time I'm able to get to my 24-hour goal, it makes me feel wanted”.

“Speaking of,” I say “Why?”

She looks at me expectantly so I clearly say “Isn't that very unhealthy?”.

“I mean we have universal healthcare,” She says “Unlike America”.

“Speaking of, again,” I say “Are you gonna talk about Anto-”.

“ONCE AGAIN I AM NOT ATTRACTED TO ANTON” she shouts back, standing back up.

“Back to square one” I mutter.

“Look” I try “hiding from it with a wall of arrogance is just the worst thing to do, in any situation”.

“Well yeah,” she says with a sign of resignation, sitting back down “but what if he rejects me?”.

“I mean” Daitan continues “Not only is he attracted to Atsuo, but I haven't exactly been the kindest to him”.

“That's one way to put it” I mutter before clearing my throat and saying “Well, you miss 100 percent of shots you don’t take”.

“You know,” Daitan says “If Reina was here, she would point out that it's copied from the internet”.

“Well I mean she would be right,” I say.

“You know, this really helped me a lot,” Daitan says, looking out the window at Anton “You know what, I’ll do it, but on one condition”.

“What?” I ask.

“You must first confess to Atsuo,” she states.

“Alright fine,” I say “But don’t blame me if it fails”.

“Oh I’ll blame you 100%,” She says jokingly, I think.

“Anyways, you wanna go back to the fireworks, or as Anton would say sparklers?” I ask, walking to the door.

“Nah” Daitan rejects “I’m gonna stream”.

I’m about to look back and say a passing remark but when I look back, she’s just gone.

“You know what,” I say to myself, “Might as well get some extra sleep”.

And that's what I did.

For the first time in quite a while, I woke up without someone waking me up in some way.

I think this is finally the day I don’t almost hit my head on the edge of the table when I slip while getting up and almost hit the edge of the table.

I sigh and get back up “Another awful day coming right up,” I think.

I turn around and see Jiro right behind me.

I stare at him for a little bit for some reason.

“Really? you get startled when Atsuo does it but when I do it you just stare at me?!” Jiro wines.

“Because you look ridiculous,” I say

I haven’t been telling you what they’re wearing cause it doesn't really matter but they all have been wearing the same style of clothes with a slight variation of the colorings.

“That’s what I'm going for!” Jiro says, brightening up “Ridiculous American!”.

“They’re all ridiculous” Daitan interjects.

Jiro yelps and falls on the floor, “Could you not do that?” he groaned.

“Not talking?” she asks “Funny enough that's what I want you to do as well”.

They both laugh at the whole situation and Daitan helps Jiro get up.

“Guess you’re doing better now,” I ask either of them.

“Yeah” Jiro, Daitan, and Reina say.

Jiro and Daitan are both startled, Jiro falling on the floor again.

“Hey I have a new story I’m thinking about,” Reina says “Do you want to put in some input?”.

“You’re writing stories?!” Jiro fakely exaggerates “I thought you were randomly typing on your computer?!”.

“Ok fine” Reina sighs “The 2 of you, care to put in some input”.

“Ok but what is the story, Anton asks”.

Jiro falls on the floor again and Reina says “It’s kinda like one of those sports anime, this is tennis, but it focuses on the character growth of the characters”.

“So, a sports anime,” I say.

“No, that's not what I meant,” Reina says.

“Oh you mean like k-on where they don’t actually do the thing the series is about?” Jiro says.

“No not that either,” Reina says “It’s more like Evangelion”.

“Have you ever played tennis? Atsuo asks.

Jiro falls on the floor once again and Reina says “No I haven't but I can research it, also here's something else I'm thinking about ''.

“You know how some scientists say you only use 10 percent of your brain,” Reina continues.

“That is completely false,” I say.

“Okay… but did you know we only use 60 percent of our muscles?” Reina tries.

“So what, is the whole book gonna be about the characters going 100% in a silly game” Anton asks.

“Says the person who gets excited about American football” Jiro giggles.

“Look it’s kinda complicated, I’ll just show you the first page later,” Reina says as she starts to walk back to her room to type the web novel.

“I guess I’m going to work,” Anton and Atsuo say at the same time.

“Oh right you had that awful part-time job,” I say “Is that where you’ve been disappearing to?”.

“Yeah,” Atsuo says, but something feels off about it, not like she’s lying but something else.

I decided not to worry about it, it’s probably nothing.

“You know what, I’ve been kinda burnt out from work recently,” Anton says “You guys have any good recommendations?”

“I know this good crepe place, but you gotta take me there,” Jiro says.

“Oh? Do I gotta?” Anton says.

“I’ll pay!” Jiro says.

My mood instantly sagged even more. If you don’t know why, guess how Jiro got the money without a job.

………………………….………………………….……………………………………………….. ………………………………………………………………………………………………………………..

If you guessed that he just got a job well you'd be wrong, he fricking sold the antidepressants.

I guess he got rid of them I guess.

“When did you have money?” Anton asks

“I got a job!” Jiro says as he pulls out a business card “I took some online courses and boom! I'm a freelancer now”.

My bad.

“Alright fine,” Anton says “But Masao gotta come as well”.

“Oh, do I gotta?” I ask.

“Yes,” Anton says.

“Fair enough,” I say.

“Ok, so where is that place?” Anton asks Jiro.

“Harajuku,” He says .

“I am not driving for 1 hour on my break day,” Anotn says, doing the quotation thing while saying break day.

“Ok then, let's take the train” Jiro suggests.

We all decided why not and go,

As the train arrives at the station, Anton automatically walks into it.

“What are you doing?” I shout (If you don’t know, the trains in Japan are loud as hell).

“I’m getting on the train?” Anton questions in the same way as yesterday when I asked him why he’s here.

“Ok, but you were about to go on the girls-only section of the train”. I insist.

“Why does that even exist!?” Anton stupidly asks, realizing that he’s standing on it.

Both me and Jiro squint at him as over 100 people go inside the train at the same time.

“Have you ever traveled by train in Japan before?” Jiro says jokingly, I think, I mean there's no way someone who lived here for over 5 years has never gone onto the trains.

“I’ll be honest,” Anton says ‘I saved up to buy a car so that I could avoid the train entirely”.

We both groan, realizing that we are going to have a new person to guide through the trains.

After around an hour, we finally made it to the place.

“Tell me Jiro,” I ask “Was it worth it?”.

“Trust me, the craps are going to be so good, they will change your hair color,” Jiro says jokingly (I’m pretty confident in this one).

“What?” Anton asks.

We continue through the train and I’m not describing it because it doesn't matter, it's just some concrete, some advertising, and too many people.

Also for future reference, I’m not doxing us, you probably noticed that but I’m not saying the location of where 5 human beings are living, not friends, just people.

We get out to see a street with some Pokemon banners on it and Jiro squeals.

“Come on, let's go!” he says as he runs straight into the road.

“Jiro, stop being an idiot,” Anton says.

He does not “stop being an idiot”, just looks back, while on the road, and says “Huh?”.

Then I saw it, a car barreling toward Jiro and stopped centimeters away from him.

Anton grumbles and walks to Jiro dragging the husk of a body away while I just walk carefully.

When we get to the other side, all of us are exhausted. I don’t know about them, but reliving so many memories is bad for you, well, it's memory but the same difference.

Then I realize the reason my plans haven’t been working is because I use someone else's thing, not something of my own accord.

So simple as that, I’m going to hang myself, with my clothes.

It’s a bit hard but all you really have to do is to get to the back of a shop, take off your shirt, tie it with a noose (Strength it with any other article of clothing, I used my undershirt), and now tie it to your head while on your toes, then, let go and wait for your deat- -.

Just then something knocks me down and I look up to see Anton.

“It’s not what it looks like” I try

“Well, guess I'm going to find out what this shit looks like” Anton retorts, loading his gun.

“Look,” I try to assure “I know how that gun works, it just rubber bulle-”.

“YOU THINK I’M JOKING AROUND” Anton shouts.

He then aims his gun at his arm and shoots.

The bullet goes right through his arm, then he holds me by the shoulder, put his gun to my head, and says “Now I will repeat, I’m going to find out what this shit looks like”.