The pain of saying 'I love you'

Then, there was an eerie silence in the monastery, as if all presence of life had faded away. 'Despair' let out a quiet sigh, and then closed his eyes as he allowed his mind to stir with the host's thoughts once again. Slightly, Lumière's senses began to return.

The black cloak immediately fell away from the figure's body, returning to the natural shadows of the monastery's hall. His black hair and pale white face gradually dissipated, and Lumière's features returned along with his lucidity. The darkness in his vision fell away, and the burgeoning eyes that glanced down at him from the shadowy clouds above blinked in unison, and sunk away into the ceiling. In an instant, the scene had returned to normal. Although, for Lumière, he had no idea what had just transpired. He only realised the absence of the intruder and the addition of the massive red portraiture that had been splayed onto the monastery's wall.

Lumière grabbed the poker which had lost its red-hot sheen, and cautiously stepped around the monastery's hall as he checked to see if the intruder was still present. Although taking a look at the bits of clothing around the stain on the wall, he was able to securely assume that the remains belonged to the rat man. Beside his remains, there was a strange rectangular object that seemed to hold a silver sheen around its edges, so he cautiously reached out his hand and picked it up.

When he turned it over, he realised it was of no significance. It was a card pulled from a standard deck of fifty-two cards- the one of spades. There was a shadowy figure on its surface, cradling the black spade gently within its arms. It gave off a terrifying chill, although there didn't seem to be anything else about it. After sating his curiosity, he tossed it back to the ground, and let out a quiet sigh.

The silver flames had burnt away as soon as the intruder had died, so Lumière used the oil lamp he had lit up earlier to locate the other lamps and set them alight. Even as the bright orange glow began to illuminate the monastery's hall, the light shaking of his body and his tense nerves didn't dissipate. His heart seemed to beat a thousand times a minute, and his mind was racing with a thousand thoughts that were unintelligible amidst the noise in his head.

However, one incredibly loud thought rang through his mind.

'Father Benedict and Sister Alinde... I haven't seen their bodies. Does this mean that they were able to get away?'

However, the quiet tension in the air was quickly cut away by more despair.

"Lumi..." A voice called out hoarsely from a room beside him.

Down the hall to the left of the cathedral's main room, a voice had called out his name. He immediately carried the lamp and ran down the hall, swinging the bloodstained door of the left room open. As he shone the light of the oil lamp into the room, his eyes widened in horror.

In the room, the corpses of children had been plastered to the walls and floor. Some had rib cages visible, and others had their heads torn from their bodies. The tables and chairs that once neatly decorated the room were torn apart, their legs and splinters having pierced the now-cold corpses that spilt their blood across the floor. Lumière's mind raced and his stomach churned; he immediately felt nauseous, but before he could spew the contents of his meals out onto the floor, a hoarse, quiet voice shocked him back into lucidity.

"Lumi…"

In the centre of the ash-strewn carnage, there was a woman in black church attire and a head of messied and bloodied blonde hair that fell towards her shoulders. Her cheeks were covered in thick red blood, and that was because it looked as if her eyes had been gouged out of her skull. Her hand which she raised weakly towards the nearby sound of footsteps was missing three fingers, and her right leg had been cleaved from her body. However, all of her wounds were charred black, and the blood had coagulated- as if they had been simultaneously cauterised by the silver flames.

"Elise?" Lumière spoke aloud, the strength in his eyes shimmering as if it had begun to dissipate. He immediately fell to his knees at her side, propping her head up with his hand as he looked down at her.

His lip quivered, and he could tell that his subsequent words would be fraught with shakiness, so he desperately instilled all that was left of his calm demeanour as he tried to soothe her.

"It's all right now, Elise. That person… he's dead." He spoke softly as he brushed a strand of her hair which had grown stiff with blood out of her face. He had tried to make his voice sound as still as possible in an attempt to calm her worries, but if she could have seen his grimacing and horrified face, it would have had no meaningful effect.

"Are the children alright, Lumi?"

Lumière shook his head visibly, but after realising its insignificance to Sister Alinde, he spoke aloud.

"No."

She let out a pained sigh before speaking.

"I could hear their screams, even though I couldn't see them… when everything grew quiet, I had some remaining hope that maybe I had grown deaf too- and that the children's silence was really filled with their laughter that I could not hear."

Her voice was hoarse and shaky, clear that every word she spoke grew weaker alongside her.

"Is the main hall safe now, Lumi?"

"It is. Although, the scent of death lingers."

Sister Alinde smiled painfully, before extending her hand which had lost many fingers to touch gently upon Lumière's face. He almost couldn't contain the anxieties and horrors inside himself as he felt the familiar softness of her hand.

"Can you... take me to the statue of the Goddess?" Sister Alinde smiled painfully.

"I can do whatever you wish."

"You're a wish-granter now, are you?" She teased. Her chiding words were immediately interrupted by a coughing fit, and so Lumière didn't wait for further replies.

Picking her frail form up, Lumière's lip quivered. He stepped up, holding her gently in his arms, and began to move forward. As Lumière carefully carried her through the hall, her coughing fit ceased, and so Sister Alinde spoke aloud.

"You feel warm... like the sun. Isn't that wonderful?"

Lumière couldn't hold himself back anymore.

"Is this the world that you love? Is this okay?" Lumière said with a shuddering breath.

"Say that it is… and it will be…" She murmured.

Her breathing had grown ever shallower, and her body felt slightly cold to the touch.

"The world really is beautiful, Lumière... I hope you'll grow to treasure all the things that I love..." She whispered in a hoarse voice.

"How can I? How can I accept this?"

"Because I asked you too. Please change the world, and admire it in the meantime..." Sister Alinde smiled softly. "Even when bad things like this happen, don't let the world turn you so cruel and callous."

Having reached the main hall, Lumière walked over to the altar at the head of the room, and stared up at the face of the goddess, his face twisted with some sort of adverse hatred. Even if Sister Alinde had said so, he couldn't help but let the world's unfairness twist his heart. He sat down underneath the statue and held the weakened woman in his arms, holding her head up with his palm as he looked down at her with sorrow.

Under the statue of the Goddess's watch, where she was surely watching down on her, Sister Alinde smiled softly.

"Lumière..." Sister Alinde spoke hoarsely. "I love you."

His heart sank immediately.

"I love you too," Lumière replied through his tears.

"No... I'm in love with you."

"I know what you mean, so you don't have to repeat it twice, you stupid girl..."

Lumière could barely speak without his voice choking up.

"No... I changed my mind... say it again."

The air in the monastery was still and quiet, apart from Lumière's sobs. There was no response. His heart sunk to its greatest depths, and a dull pain began to sting every nerve throughout his body. Tears streamed down his face, and his once-calm breaths shuddered.

"Say it again!" Lumière cried out. "Please... please say it again..."

He clutched at her tattered clothes, pulling her closer, although the warmth in her body had already faded away, and so she felt like no more than another corpse. Her bloodied face had shut its eyes, and a soft smile remained on her face, even in her death. So, he just sat in the eerie silence of the monastery's hall and blankly stared at her expression while his tears flowed and gradually dried up against his face.

In the quiet atmosphere of the monastery, Lumière could feel his eyes growing heavy. An eerie calm had pooled in his heart, and his anxieties had vanished. However, illusory murmurs began resounding throughout the room once more, clearer than they ever had been, shocking him back into lucidity as he glanced upwards.

"{Murderer!}"

"{Murderer!}"

"{Murderer!}"

Thick black shadows arose from around him, pooling against the ceiling as burgeoning eyes glanced down upon him. Rather, they seemed to be staring at the bright silvery glow that had blanketed the room in an eerie calm beside him. Lumière's gaze looked downwards and saw that the unimportant card, the one of spades left behind by the rat man, had begun to glow alike to the silver flames that had erupted during their fight. He reached out cautiously and picked it up, flipping it over to reveal its image. The image of the man cradling the black spade now looked upwards towards him, with horrified eyes that had begun to bleed thick black blood down his cheeks. At the same time, Lumière's face felt warm and wet. He reached out to touch his cheeks and retracted his fingers, realised that his flowing tears had turned a pitch-black colour.

A piercing pain burst through his head, and before he could even try and discern the matter, Lumière fell unconscious, his head resting against the altar underneath the watch of the Goddess of Thorns, cradling the cold corpse of his 'sun' in his arms. The spade card fell to the ground, and its silvery glow began to dissipate. Its shadow trembled underneath the faint lamplight and grew small black tendrils which reached slowly over towards Lumière. As they made contact with his own shadow, they seemed to fuse with it before disappearing entirely.

Immediately, his body began to emanate a dark and cold black aura.

—-

Three figures, all cloaked in black, rushed through the ajar door of the monastery, only to reel back in horror and nauseous disgust as they witnessed the sights of the carnage. Father Benedict, Constantine Adler, and Eamon Stroud immediately looked towards each other with glances of agreement. Constantine reached into his jacket and produced a silvery revolver, and Eamon Stroud did the same. Father Benedict followed worriedly behind them, having steeled his heart and his gaze as they re-entered the monastery. Inside, illuminated by faint lamplight, he saw the familiar sight of his childhood friend, the career liar and illusionist, Lumière. He had thick black blood dried up against his cheeks, and he gently held in his arms the Sister, Elise Alinde, who had lost many of her extremities, as well as her eyes.

Father Benedict immediately rushed over towards them, abandoning his caution as he felt for their pulses. Lumière had a faint and healthy breath, but Elise had long grown cold. Father Benedict's lip quivered, but he retracted his hand and stood back up without even a sigh escaping his mouth.

"One survivor in this room. Lumière Croft has survived the attack." Father Benedict spoke with strange professionalism back towards the two figures of the organised criminal group.

Constantine let out a sigh of relief that he didn't show outwardly and began to glance around at the bloodied corpses which had been charred pitch-black by flames. Father Benedict did the same, and his mind began racing immediately, not giving him a moment of reprieve to grieve.

'I have to report this… something as strange as this… the bishop will want to know of this.'

Constantine had different thoughts from the Father, however. At the same time, Eamon began to think the same.

'Has 'he' begun to move?'