Resolve

I was looking down from a cliff. Below me was an all-engulfing inferno that ravaged the land. The screams from burning victims reached the sky along with maniacal laughter. Scared to look for even another second, I turned away, but that only brought my eyes to a different horror.

"Lyn..."

With watery blood trailing her morbid figure, the pale-skinned, wet body of my mother crawled. The broken end of an arrow stuck out from her back, but it seemed to sink deeper into her with every movement. Frightened, I fumbled backwards and ended up falling down the cliff.

The impact was dull, and there was no fire where I landed, but that fact couldn't rise above my fear. I sat up facing the cliff and tried to shuffle away, but then my back collided with something. I immediately turned around and found a group of men surrounding a big bonfire. The men threw things into the fire, and for some reason, I could clearly see the objects being thrown. Each was a body part that had been roughly torn off from someone. I tried to pretend not to know who these pieces belonged to, but our eyes met. They weren't the eyes of one of the men surrounding the fire, but the eyes of the head that was being thown into it. With my blood-drained face clearly reflected, those eyes stared at me, saying nothing only staring.

"!!!"

Carolyn shot up from bed with her body soaked in cold sweat. It was still a dark night, but any trace of drowsiness had left her. She had had similar dreams before, but they usually ended when she fell off the cliff. She never liked how her mother was depicted in the dreams, and now the same went for her father. Just thinking about it made breathing hard, so she pulled her favourite hair tie from her wrist and squeezed it between her hands. She didn't use it frequently inside the village, but she never forgot it.

As she squeezed the hair tie, the warm smile of her mother replaced the nightmare stuck in her memory. However, she was still too scared to sleep, so she stayed up while holding the hair tie. Nothing would be resolved if she stayed like this, but at least she would have some peace.

Early the next day, Hanson visited Teri's house.

"Good morning, Doctor T-, Ouch!"

Before he could even finish his greeting, Teri slapped him across the head.

"I'm not sure what happened, but the missie came back after crying last night. Have you already forgotten what you promised to do, you damn fool?"

After a night of nagging from his wife and some self-reflection, Hanson knew there was no way for him to defend himself.

"I have no excuse."

"Hmph, that's for sure."

"How, is she?"

"Certainly not in the mood to see your face."

"...That makes sense. Can I at least speak to her? I know it may come off as selfish, but I believe this is something I have to do."

"...Fine, but it'll be behind a door."

"That's fine."

The two then moved towards Carolyn's room. The window was shut, so her room was too dark to see anything properly, but she could still hear sounds from outside the room. She heard someone talking with Teri, but she didn't know who it was until they stopped in front of her room.

"Hey, missie, the idiot is here. If you want me to shoo him off, then just say so."

Carolyn easily figured out who Teri meant, but she didn't have a strong reaction regarding the reveal. After her latest nightmare, any anger she felt for Hanson was buried. She didn't want to talk to anyone, but she didn't feel strongly enough to send him away either.

"What, is it?"

Carolyn's hoarse voice was a piercing reminder to Hanson of his mistake. It made him feel so ashamed of himself for being so immature, but he remembered that this wasn't the time for self-loathing. Carolyn was the one who deserved his full attention. With his knees on the floor like a sinner awaiting punishment, Hanson began.

"Firstly, I must apologise for my words last night. I shouldn't have been so inconsiderate."

"..."

"Ms. Carolyn, I know I hardly have a leg to stand on, but you can't let their deaths consume you. While I can't tell you about your parents' true identity, I hope you will listen to what I have to say about them. I was also distraught by the news of their deaths, but it also made me remember the memories we shared.

Rodrick, to be polite, I thought he was an idiot when I first met him."

Carolyn furrowed her brows at that moment, shocked that the first thing Hanson had to say about her father was an insult. However, she soon got a glimpse into the strong bond they shared.

"In terms of fighting strength, I had no complaints, but I always felt that he wasn't worthy of being next to your honoured mother. Still, if I had to pick someone to serve her, then I would definitely choose him. He was slow at times and acted inappropriately due to his background, but I knew that I could trust him to protect my liege. That's why, when they disappeared together, as much as I complained about being left behind, I didn't think I had to worry. Even though I should have been there to give her all the help I could provide."

Hanson paused for a few moments to collect the thoughts that his nostalgia and guilt had disorganised.

"As for your honoured mother, she excelled in any field I could think of and had a kind heart comparable to a saint. However, as much as I loathe to acknowledge it, she wasn't perfect either. Her innocent curiosity often led her to take dangerous journeys, which made my heart weak just hearing about them. I still remember the first time she went to visit the slums with Rodrick as her only company. Thankfully, she wasn't recognised, but they had to fight their way out after she offended the local powers to save a child. I was naturally proud of her, but at the same time, she certainly kept me on my toes."

"There was a time when the two of them snuck out to a festival..."

"I had to spend an entire week covering for them..."

"I couldn't be more proud to be her vassal than at that moment..."

Inaudible to those outside her room, Carolyn chuckled as tears spilled over. She didn't know what her parents were like when they were younger, but as she heard Hanson's stories, they seemed to fit them well. Carolyn remained in bed, but she focused her attention on the other side of the door, listening to Hanson's stories and remembering her own. Before either of them had noticed, the sun had set, and Teri interrupted Hanson.

"You seem to be on a roll, but it's almost nighttime; do you plan on talking all night?"

"Is it that late already? I guess I should return for today then."

Uplifted and slightly disappointed, Carolyn let her voice be heard.

"Hanson, thank you. Next time, I'll share my stories with you."

"...I'll look forward to it."

Once Hanson's steps faded away, Carolyn called out Teri next.

"Mr. Teri, please forgive me for skipping work today."

"Don't worry about that. I don't need an assistant; I'm just teaching you because you asked."

"Even so, thank you."

"Will you be having dinner tonight?"

"I, I might be late."

"Then I'll leave it out for you. Don't let it get cold."

After Teri also left, Carolyn returned her focus to the inside of her room. The window remained closed, so she could barely see a thing, but the hair tie in her hands was all she needed. Her eyes were still watery thanks to Hanson's stories, but she no longer felt like screaming. Hanson's stories reminded her of the happy memories that she had of her parents. They were more bland than the tales she heard from Hanson, but they were also irreplaceable.

"I don't know if I can really move on. But I won't forget. Before the two of you died, you had certainly lived. These memories are proof of that."

It was still sad to know that her parents were gone, but Carolyn felt that she could finally accept that. However, because she couldn't forget, she wouldn't forgive either. At least not without knowing the full story.

Carolyn reached for her necklace, the same one she had found in her mother's book. After showing it to Hanson, he told her not to show it to others and to keep it close, so she always wore it along with her hair tie.

"What it all means, I won't make my decision until I figure that out."