(Poem) miss\aligned

i see the light in your eyes
sparkle
like the stars in the night sky,
shine
like the blazing sun,
sprout
through the frosted snow in a barren field of white. 

your smile is so warm, so
sincere, hearty. it feels
like a long greeting, a welcoming embrace, affection
that i had never had before.
if i could wish, i wish to go back
to that time in the past
when i had never noticed your gaze, when i had never felt
the need to notice.

now, all i see
is you
in my memories, my dreams. all i feel
is just a fragment of who you were before
when i let you go, when i
gave you up, when i told myself
i was never good enough
because i wasn’t as bright, as beautiful, as
warm
as you once were to me.

i wish
i could have another chance
to turn back time, to rewind. i wish
i could take back all of my mistakes. i wish it were still possible
to stand beside you, beaming
a smile that’s just as brilliant, blinding like the sun, with eyes gleaming
like the insides of a kaleidoscope. i wish
you still saw me in that light
like how i finally see you
when you eventually gave up and left.