Chapter 02

“Buy something from my store first, then maybe I’ll answer you.”

That has been the common answer we received as we asked where rare and exotic species are sold in this alien bazaar located in a moon of some planet orbiting some supergiant star in a faraway galaxy. By “we”, I mean just me and Tank Top as he served as my interpreter in case we needed to communicate using obscure languages. The other three were out doing something else.

I was intent on complying to the conditions of the shopkeepers, but, well, let’s just say it wasn’t as easy as asking for directions to the bathroom.

“Can’t you see that I’m selling velnashythor?!” The shopkeeper of the first stall I stopped at said to me, annoyed, as if the answer is supposed to be common knowledge.

I could only stare in disgust at his merchandise. On the front of his shop were multiple buckets of fat maggot-like things the size of a regular hotdog squirming and trying to climb out of their containers. Considering they were being sold uncooked, I’d rather think it was a pet store. That is, ignoring the fact that I already witnessed people buying and eating the maggot-like things as I waited for my turn to talk to the shopkeeper.

I was recording the whole encounter and I was tempted to point my smartphone at my face so I could make a reaction video. But, I decided against it.

“If you’re not going to buy, then scram!” the shopkeeper scolded the two of us. “You’re holding up the line!”

People, or rather, alien beings were lining up for it despite my disbelief.

I bought a piece of those hotdog-sized maggots even though I had no intention of eating it, nor did Tank Top even had a need to eat as his kind does not have a mouth.

But, the only answer the shopkeeper gave us was, “Head towards the wet market and ask around there, someone might know.”

“What? But I thought you knew?” I protested.

“I never said I did. I just said I’ll answer your question”, backsassed the shopkeeper.

I tried asking again, but I was deliberately being ignored as he tended to the person next in line. Tank Top then pulled me away into the crowd to try somewhere else.

The next few stalls I asked were similar; they were selling alien food.

Some I would recognize as such due to the fact that they appear to be skewered meat. Of course, I have no idea from which animal or creature it came from. Although, some would serve skewers with the critter itself ranging from slug-like creatures that’s as big as my forearm, to bugs and arachnids the size of a baseball.

Some I would think are food because they were being cooked over a fire, whether by wok, a grill, or a spit. But, I wouldn’t be able to recognize any of the ingredients even if you held me at gunpoint.

The rest, I wouldn’t believe were edible if I didn’t see anyone buying and eating them. There was one stand serving copper noodles in what looks like ramen. And they’re not an alien type of copper, it’s the same metallic element that’s used in electric wires back on Earth!

Curiously, I found the mishmash of odors appetizing. There were lots of strong savory smells coming from every corner of the street. But, I immediately lose my appetite when I think that the food is some weird alien being.

Still, I bought what they were selling as they laid the same conditions as the first shopkeeper I talked to, but got the same replies to head for the wet market.

Eventually, we got the hint and moved to the next street where the wet market was located.

The meat section was not like the supermarkets back on Earth where the meats are organized by which animal it came from and their types of cuts. The meats were butchered on demand. Parts that were cut off but weren't bought wholesale were strewn on the stalls or hung to the eaves regardless of what kind of creature it came from. Some stalls even have the carcass hanging from a hook attached to a roof and that's where they slice off the meat to be sold.

Surprisingly, the walkway was clean. The butchers’ area had a metal mesh flooring so all the goo and body fluids coming from all the slaughter were drained into the gutters below it and didn’t reach the customer-facing front.

However, the smells weren’t as alluring as the street had that distinct odor of manure and rotten eggs. There were even visible puffs of air that smelled like very strong farts. I could taste that disgusting bitterness in my mouth and gagged on reflex whenever I walked into one. They were hard to avoid as the foot traffic was shoulder to shoulder.

That said, I was heavily reluctant to buy anything from this part of the bazaar. But, I still asked in a few stalls and they gave me the same conditions as the food sellers, so I bought a few pieces of what looks like chicken drumsticks, slabs of t-bone steaks, and pork chops. Although, I’m pretty sure these aren’t from the animals I’m familiar with so I’m not even sure what I’ll be doing with them later on.

Unfortunately, the butchers were as slimy as the food sellers. They said, “Head for the livestock merchants, surely they’ll know if you’re looking for live critters.”

Although, as frustrating as their answer is, they made sense. But, in my defense, I didn’t know this bazaar also sold livestock.

I mean, back on Earth, there were no supermarkets that sold live animals. Perhaps, in the past, maybe people did in their markets. But, it’s no longer part of modern common sense as it causes hygiene problems.

I looked at Tank Top to vent a bit. I told him, “We should have gone there first!”

I did not know either, was his excuse, but I dropped the issue there. He didn’t need food after all, perhaps he was not familiar with these markets.

Heading for the next street where the livestock was sold, we passed through the produce section. It was more organized than the meat section that walking through their borders felt like passing through two different worlds.

Items that can be held by one hand or larger are stacked by type into pyramids regardless of shape. Whether they were round, square, rectangular, hexagonal, or whatever-gonal, it seems to be the trend.

Stalks of what seems like vegetables were tied together by type and color and stacked onto triangles, if not placed into small baskets hanging on the stall’s posts.

Grains were displayed in open sacks neatly aligned in rows.

We had no business here, though, so Tank Top and I simply passed through.

The street where livestock was sold was significantly wider than the previous two we were in. Entering it, you’d immediately see the reason why it’s more spacious as you can easily spot cages that are three stories tall to keep a large creature of the same size in.

There were lots of cages as most of the animals were kept in them. One exception were small critters that can’t fly like the hotdog-sized maggots that I saw before which can be kept in a bucket. The other exception were aquatic beings, which were kept in tanks of varying colors, which I assume isn’t simply water.

We asked around, but we were still met with the same conditions by the shopkeepers. However, the merchants that were selling tiny creatures were not interested in selling by piece.

"Head for the food stalls if you only want one", they said. But, we've already been there before.

 I did not know what I would do with a bucket full of bugs, so I passed on that.

I tried looking around for critters that are only as large as a house cat. I figured I could maybe turn them into a pet. But, they were expensive and out of our budget.

Goldy gave Tank Top and I a spending allowance that would be equivalent to buying ten Big Macs back home on Earth. Not only had we already spent half of that just to get vague answers, the cheapest cat-sized creature I found was priced a thousand times that.

Alien fishes the size of a small goldfish were even more expensive as the cheapest went for an equivalent of twenty thousand Big Macs.

I went back to try and buy a bucket of maggots, but they cost three times our initial budget.

We had to give up.

After looking around making sure there wasn't a shop selling rare and endangered creatures out in the open, we moved on.

The next street focused on textiles and clothing. Carpets were already out of our budget, so we sought out stalls that sold t-shirts.

Unfortunately, the materials used in the shirts were either giving me rashes or making me sneeze uncontrollably so I was unable to buy anything. But, Tank Top seems to have had a grand time picking out tank tops.

Still, going back on topic, after buying some tank tops, the only answers the merchants gave us was to head for the livestock street. Since we had just been there without finding any leads, we moved on to the next street where the money lenders, money exchangers, pawn shops, notaries and other services were located.

I was already losing hope at this point when one of the merchants called for our attention.

“You two are the ones asking around for rare endangered species, yes?” The small nasally voice came from a three-foot gecko standing upright wearing goggles with dark lenses over his eyes and clad in what looks like a tattered tuxedo with a tail.

“Why?” I sneeringly asked, taking my frustration out. “Are you going to tell us which shop they sell those?”

He laughed heartily.

“Heavens, no”, he replied after. “But I'll tell you what - I like people with a sense of humor.”

“I also like determined people, people who know what they want and don’t give up”, he continued. “So, I'll tell you this as a friendly service; a gift to smoothen the beginning of our acquaintanceship, which can hopefully bloom into a partnership.”

“Get to the point already”, I said impatiently.

“You see, you’ve come to a place of commerce.”

“I mean, I can see that”, I stated sarcastically. We were in a bazaar after all.

“When you were asking for information from the merchants, what did they ask from you in return?”

“They asked us to buy something from them?”

“Yes! And have you not thought about why those merchants were asking you to buy their products first?”

I thought about the answer to his question for a moment, but I was drawing a blank.

Seeing the confused look on my face, the lizard person continued, “You see, they were asking a fee for the information you sought.”

“Are you saying we can buy the information we need?” I said.

“Now you’re getting it”, he enthusiastically replied.

“But then, where could we buy that information?” I countered. “We don’t see any signs that say ‘Information Broker’ or the like.”

“Perhaps, I can help with that”, he said, smiling, looking pleased with himself.