Episode 1-4: To Be Understood

Ah, the lunchroom. I definitely didn’t miss this place. Stepping through the doors my eyes naturally move to the table I sat at all last year, at the very very back. No one’s there right now, how fun. It must be waiting for me, the poor thing. Well, probably tomorrow. There’s no way this girl’s interest in me lasts long enough to go past today.

Arriving at the line, I grab a slice of burnt pizza from the little heat box and place it on my tray, skipping past every other option as I arrive at the little register lady’s computer. Showing her my school id, she looks up my number and snickers.

Register Woman - “Actually eating today? The world must be ending.”

Riley - “Haha.”

Walking out of line I see Sarah waiting for me, moving up close and giggling.

Sarah - “Fair warning, if Chris bothers you just tell him to knock it off. He’s a big boy so he can take it.”

Riley - “Noted? Wait, what do you mean both-”

Sarah - “Go go, let's go!”

Dragged alongside her we both reach a table about halfway down the cafeteria. There are two girls and two boys waiting there. I recognize Yuta immediately, messing with the strings of his sweatshirt, while the other boy, who I can only guess is Chris, is passed out on his tray, applesauce swallowing his nose whole.

Sarah - “Chloe, your brother’s gonna die.”

One of the girls looks up from her phone, an amused smile spreading across her face.

Chloe - “We can only be so lucky Sarah. Bring a friend?”

I raise a hand to give a stilted hi when I freeze up. My eyes focus on the other girl who seems absolutely lost in drawing something.

Her black cloak shifts as her head turns to meet my gaze. She seems to always know when I’m looking at her. Her features swim with surprising grace from confusion to surprise to glee.

Marianalotongue - “Riley?! Haiiiii Rileyyyy!”

…I think I’m going to die right here.

Sarah - “Riley, is your nose bleeding?”

I feel under my nose, look at her in confusion, and see a smug grin on her face.

W-what’s she thinking? I feel a cold chill spread over me as I look away.

Marianalotongue - “I don’t see any blood…”

Her words of curiosity go unnoticed as I end up being very eagerly pushed by this weird ass girl with strange curiosities to the seat in front of this long named girl and am forced to sit. Next to me I can see the boy suffocating in applesauce adjust his position, leaving now both of his breathing holes covered.

Riley - “Should…should we maybe wake him up now?”

Chloe - “Hang on.”

Chloe holds her phone out, and a flash comes from her camera as she smirks.

Chloe - “Hehe, alright, wake up time. CHRIS!”

The boy sneezed as he rockets up, his face getting covered in sugary apple slop. He looks this way and that, before his eyes lock on his sister and his surprise turns to annoyance.

Chris - “Mrrrrgh…mmnnnshit…”

Chloe lets out a snicker as he takes a napkin off her tray and wipes his face clean.

Chris - “Next time you want a drink from the vending machine you can pay for it yourself.”

Chloe - “Wah, over a chuckle?! You ass!”

Chris refuses a response, grabbing his milk carton and drinks it down.

Chris - “It’s your fault anyways for keeping me up all night on that ca-”

Chloe - “HUPBABA-New person!”

Chris - “Huh?”

Turning his attention to me he flashes a quick grin.

Chris - “Oh, well, hello there.”

He does his best to look as though I didn’t just see him coated in sugar substance, which honestly is more comical than when his face was covered in sugar substance.

Riley - “Yes, hello.”

Chris - “Friend of Sarah’s I assume?”

Riley - “I don’t know.”

Chris - “...”

Riley - “Yes! Yeah yeah yeah!”

Sarah - “New friend, hurrayyyy!”

Chris - “I see…”

I do my best to focus on my tray so as to not just run off forever. Can’t I just manage being even a little normal?

Slight movement in front of me catches my gaze, and I find myself staring at Marianalotongue’s sketchbook. The art is…very amateurish. Still, I kind of like it. As I watch, I can start to feel myself relaxing a bit.

Marianalotongue - “Do you like it?”

I look up and see her staring at me, a smile on her face.

Riley - “Oh. Uhm, yeah, it’s pretty neat.”

Marianalotongue - “I’m glad.”

Riley - “What, uh, what is it?”

Marianalotongue - “Cover for my webcomic.”

Riley - “Webcomic?”

Marianalotongue - “Yeah! I’ve been working on it for a year now. It’s been a lot of fun.”

Riley - “That’s surprising.”

Marianalotongue - “Mmm? How so?”

Riley - “Just wasn't expecting it. Though I guess you can't just expect someone's hobbies. I don't know what I'm saying.”

Marianalotongue - “Mmm…well I'm sure I can't guess your hobbies either!”

Riley - “You're definitely much more unpredictable.”

Marianalotongue - “How?”

Riley - “You're dressed in a black cloak in the summer. That's highly chaos-energy charged.”

Marianalotongue - “I just like black and red. I can't think of a better reason to wear them than that.”

Riley - “Weather be damned?”

Marianalotongue - “I don't believe in astrology, the sun can’t control me.”

I laugh. She laughs too.

Sarah - “Woah, you two really hit it off huh?”

Marianalotongue - “We met outside at the entrance earlier today. She's a very nice person, if a bit bad at communication.”

Riley - “Y-you don't have to keep mentioning that.”

Marianalotongue - “I thought it didn't bother you, but, oh, right, not bothering you is what bothers you.”

Riley - “You didn't have to mention that either…ahhh, can we just pretend it does bother me to make it easier?”

Marianalotongue - “That would be a lie though…”

Riley - “A lie for convenience's sake.”

Marianalotongue - “Far from a good reason to set aside honesty!”

Riley - “Unghhhhh…”

Marianalotongue - “But I’ll quit mentioning it if that will make you happy.”

Riley - “Your kindness is boundless.”

Marianalotongue - “Thank you.”

I feel my snarkiness fade away when I see her earnest smile.

Riley - “Y-yeah. You're welcome.”

I smile back.

Sarah - “Hehehe…”

Riley - “W-what?”

Sarah - “Oh nothing. Hey, Riley?”

I can feel a small ball of nervousness in my throat.

Riley - “Uhm…yeah?”

Sarah - “Mari’s pretty cute huh?”

Marianalotongue - “Huh?”

I feel that ball expand massively, to the point I can swear I'm close to choking.

Riley - “What?! No way! What are you talking about?!”

I laugh. I don't know if it sounds convincing.

Riley - “You’re really funny! Haha!”

Everyone is looking at me. They're not laughing back.

They don't…look angry. I can't read what they're thinking at all. I can't tell if that's because it's actually complicated or if my sight is just getting hazy.

Sarah - “Uhm…should I…not have said that?”

Riley - “I-It’s fine! Totally fine! You were just joking around! Haha!”

I give a big old grin as my gaze wanders over them all, trying to find a hint of their amusement I can latch onto for escape.

I stop on her face.

She looks…scared.

No.

No.

No no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no no.

Marianalotongue - “Riley…”

NONONONONONONONONONO-

Sophie - “you’re not a ____ are you?”

??? - “You okay? You look pale-”

I get up and start walking. In my head I can feel multiple voices screaming at me telling me to stop but it’s already too late. If I turn around I’ll just look insane. Well no I already look insane. I’d just have to face it if I turned around. I’m fine with you thinking I’m a weird crazy wacko gay loser disgusting monster freak bitch just don’t make me face you while you think it.

I managed to get into the hall before booking it for the staircase. Where? Where am I even gonna go? That’s a stupid question. Just go where you always do.

Riley - “I feel sick.”

Makes sense.

Riley - “I fucked up.”

I’d say so, yeah.

Riley - “Stop agreeing with me.”

Would you rather me disagree?

Riley - “I’d rather you go away.”

You know I can’t do that.

Riley - “I hate you.”

I hate you too.

Riley - “Then tell me to die.”

Would that make it any better.

Riley - “So much better.”

If you really think that then you really do deserve to feel like this.

Riley - “I know.”