A Maid's Charm

Bowler Joe was looking down on me, fighting his emotions from expressing worry as my mana cannon began priming.

“If you know what’s good for you, you’d turn off that little magic trick of yours right now,” he said.

“Negative,” I replied as per protocol. “You abuse your human privileges over me. If immediate hostility is not ceased, you will be terminated.”

I’ve never heard a more threatening tone come out of my mouth. It made me sound so scary. I hated it.

“Boss, this looks serious,” Dart Guy argued.

“And so am I.” Bowler Joe raised up his finger gun and aimed it at my heart, which was beginning to gather up energy to fire my cannon. “We ran away last time with our tails between our legs. This time, we’ll have some pride.”

“If curiosity killed the cat, pride got the dog.”

Bowler Joe had a drop of sweat drip down the side of his face. Half of him wanted to leave, and the other half was ready to die to prove a point. What that point was, I could’t say.

BWOOP!

POP!

Some strange bubbly sound popped into the intersection. The startling sound caught both Bowler Joe and myself off guard, powering down our weapons momentarily.

“What was that?” he asked. “You freaks do it?”

“It wasn’t me…” I replied.

Everyone else heard it too, immediately trying to pinpoint where it came from. A few seconds later, we heard the sound again. As moments of confusion passed, the sound started to patter around like rain.

Then it just stopped.

“She’s so cute!” someone shouted, I guess?

“Yeah, she’s a real firecracker!” another person said. Those were definitely mafia guys, but what was wrong with them?

“What’s going on?” Bowler Joe looked up, trying to find which of his men were acting up. “I’ll tie you guys to a firecracker if you don’t quit with that kinda talk!”

Even after warning his men, they continued to say silly stuff like that.

“Wow, look at that maid outfit! It makes me feel so happy!”

Maid outfit? I turned to look down the street past the intersection. There was a maid with bright yellow hair standing there, holding some sort of glowing pink wand out toward us. She had a pretty face with elegance radiating off of her like a shining star.

“Cynthia…” Marek uttered, also allured by the girl.

Cynthia? Could it be…?

She held the wand confidently up to her mouth like a microphone, then took a pose that mirrored that of an expressive pop idol.

“To all the lovely men in the audience, I bid you a good morning!” Her voice echoed loudly from out of the wand. “Why don’t we start it on the right foot and give our lovely country a round of applause?”

Nearly three quarters of the men dropped their weapons and started clapping their hands in unison. Bowler Joe was livid watching his men fall prey to such a frilly display of infatuation.

“What the hell are you people doing!?” he shouted in a powerful voice. “She’s charming you! Shake it off and shoot her!”

That got some of the men to give him a glance, but they seemed more interested in watching the maid.

“Oh, now that’s no fun, Mr. Bowler Hat Joe!” the maid waved her finger in the air, denying his words. “All these lovely boys have worked so hard, let them enjoy a little show!”

Suddenly, all the mafia guys who hadn’t dropped their guns put them down and cheered for the maid of the hour. It sounded like we’d just stepped into a music concert or something.

“Hey!” Maria shouted, trying to over power all the male cheering. “Nobody ever looks at me like that! I can be cute too!” she said, cutely leaning forward and accentuating her chest with her arms.

“Huh?” Scardy-hulk uttered. “You say something?”

SMACK!

“Guh!” She slapped him. “You dense idiots wouldn’t know cute if it slapped you in the face.”

Because everyone was focused on the maid, my friends saw an opportunity to step into an alleyway and take cover. Unfortunately I couldn’t join them, but this situation was far from over.

“Lauri, get Yamin and Marek to safety,” Uncle ordered.

“Of course,” she said, pulling Yamin toward her, but she couldn’t get Marek to budge.

“No…” Marek shook his head in protest, whipping out his antique pirate pistol. “I’m coming with you.”

“No, you're not. Let Indena and I handle this.”

While they were disagreeing, Bowler Joe aimed his finger gun at the maid, Cynthia.

“Listen, you little wench…” he growled. “I know your tricks. You idol types magically charm your audience to get them infatuated with you. I’ve had a hand in that business for over twenty years, so don’t think you’ll get my eyes.”

Wait, so pop idols use magic to get their audience to love them?

Everyone has a virtual name tag above their head, at least to my vision. Besides the people I knew the names of, most of the tags were filled in with question marks. But any of the men under Bowler Joe had little heart symbols next to their tags, meaning they had the charm affinity. She clearly was using some sort of magic to capture their attention.

Bowler Joe and Dart Guy didn’t seem affected by it. Maria was fine too, but she was a girl so that didn’t count.

“Tisk tisk.” Cynthia shook her head. “Is that all fun is to you? A game of money and girls?” She twirled around, pointing her wand up and causing dazzling sparkles to fill the air. “I think it’s time I show you what real fun is, with twinkles and twirls!”

All the men around turned toward their leader with savage looking scowles. They shouted things like “You’ve insulted the maid!” and “Let’s kill him!”

But Bowler Joe wasn’t the least bit deterred by this forced mutiny, quickly making an example of the first ones who went against his orders.

“Take this!” he shouted with all his might, grabbing the first man and slamming him into the concrete!

PEW PEW!

Then he shot a few of his finger gun bolts at his boys, knocking them out.

“Get a damn grip, men!” his voice roared through the intersection, stopping everyone in their tracks. “Don’t let that little floozy distract you! You’re on my payroll. So if you wanna eat, help me and take out that damn maid!”

The charm affinity started to disappear from a few of their name tags. They were getting back to their senses.

Meanwhile, I was scooting away like a caterpillar.

“Up you go!” Dart Guy picked me up. “You’re not escaping that easy.”

“Rats!” I growled.

But just then,Uncle leapt in and sent a kick into Dart Guy’s back! I dropped to the ground like a bag of bricks, right on my face.

Uncle got onto Dart Guy to try and hold him down, but a magic bullet from Bowler Joe knocked Uncle off and back a few feet.

Dart Guy recovered enough to aim a dart at Uncle and throw it.

“Uncle!” I shouted, knowing it was the holy steel one. It would definitely hurt!

BANG!

PING!

Marek shot the dart out of the air with his gun. Great shot!

Now that this was a free fire zone, Bowler Joe didn’t see any reason to hold back. “Light this place up!” he ordered his men. “Anyone who isn’t one of our targets, take em down!”

BANG BANG! PEW PEW!

They opened fire on us and Cynthia!

Uncle spawned a bubble shield to protect me. Indena had joined the action too and was dodging bullets with the help of her fire jetting her around. Quickly, she was striking out all the mafia men who had guns.

The maid went on the offensive too, waving her wand and returning fire on them with little heart orbs that shot from the tip!

Her wand shot out hearts? THAT'S SO CUTE! I want one!

The hearts hit the guns and turned them pink. All the bullets blasting out the barrels after were little hearts too that didn’t do any damage. Only Bowler Joe and Dart Guy were able to use their ranged attacks against the maid.

“Drop the guns, boys! Go after her!”

Upon Bowler Joe’s orders, about a dozen of the men ran out into the street with knives. They couldn't catch the maid, who was skipping quickly across the street to evade them. She almost appeared to be gliding.

“Let’s spread the love a bit, shall we?” She had such a polite tone, but a fierce purpose! A truly delicate warrior of love and justice, just like a magical girl.

Out from her wand came a sparkly pink whip like strand. She twirled it into the air like a lasso and struck the knives from all the mafia guy's hands.

Even with a major win, she was caught off guard by one of the mafia guy's springing out from the sewers and grabbing her legs.

Marek broke off from the group, rushing at the pinned Cynthia in the middle Of the street. He turned into a marathon man, sprinting without a hint of hesitation in his steps.

“Out of my way!” Marek clotheslined two of the mafia guys, taking them down.

The scaredy hulk jumped in, grabbing hold of Marek's hands, locking them both in an intense wrestle.

“Let me through!” Marek growled. “I'll raise your taxes if you don't!”

“There's only one thing in this world I fear, and it ain't the IRS!”

Speaking of which, Samael was currently sitting on Marek's shoulder.

The intense gaze of Scaredy-hulk suddenly dropped into fear. He had that look like he’d peed himself.

“Ahhh! Snake!”

And that’s when Scaredy-hulk ran off like a pansy again. Marek quickly got back to his feet and dusted off his blue jacket.

“Très bien, monsieur serpent.” Marek pet Samael on his noggin.

“Sss” Samael hissed appreciatively.

The maid was still grappled by the mafia guy, but Marek was on him, stomping him back into the sewer. Others came out to attack him, but he heroically swung fists until all the bad guys were down.

He had bruises all over his body, but he still looked like a champ as he held his hand out for the girl to take.

“Marek…” The maid breathed out his name with a flush red face.

“Cynthia…” He smiled, his face red from blood.

Wait, I knew I had heard of her before! That was the maid Marek mentioned in his dream.

Marek began to fall over, but Cynthia caught him in her arms, easing him onto the side of the street. She held up her wand and twirled it around his bruises and cuts. The damage and swelling subsided a bit.

“Always rushing in to save the girl, aren't we?” She sighed.