Here come the gyarus

In modern day Japan in a more normal timeline, a young man named Jouzou Hiroto was hanging out with some gyarus. The gyarus were his friends, Hanabi Nanatsuri, Kazamatsuri Kuragi, Mirai Fujiwara, and Ai Akahage. The five had just recently begun hanging out together in order to discuss their weird dreams and publish them online, but today, they were about to experience something extraordinary.

"Streama festivalen? What's this? Hey JZ, this from your dream?" Kuragi asked Jouzou as she stared at her phone.

"Nope, never seen that before. Though weirdly enough, one of the girls on the advent is that crepe goddess I just told you about."

"That restaurant place you described sounds cool too. Wish it was real," Mirai sighed.

"Maybe it is. They say dreams can sometimes be visions of alternate realities, so maybe it is real," Hanabi smiled.

"Never took you for the sciency type," Ai grumbled.

"I'm only sciency when it comes to dreams, otherwise I don't know jack shit."

JZ decided to tease Hanabi a bit and asked her to name the element on the periodic table that matched his name.

"Uh, Janzennite?"

"Nope, it was a trick question."

Hanabi pouted and smacked JZ in the shoulder.

"Had that coming. Now, what the hell is this?" Kuragi grumbled as she clicked on the Streama festivalen link.

Sudden;y, her, JZ, Hanabi, Mirai, and Ai were all sucked into a portal and transported to a volcanic region.

"What the- What is this place!?"

"Uh, we just isekai ourselves?"

"No, it's gotta be a dream. JZ, wake up!"

"I'm awake, dammit. Ugh, this is cuz you clicked on that weird link, Kuragi.

Kuragi began to frown as everyone glared at her. "AH, alright! Sorry!"

The group cautiously examined their surroundings as Ai pulled out her phone. "Bet that author guy JZ mentioned in his dream did this shit."

Meanwhile, a little ways over, Mimoko and Emeri went on guard as Melinda approached them.

"How did you survive!?" Emeri stammered.

"With a semi-functioning parachute, that's how. Still hirt like hell though. But now, time for some payback. So how about we go another round at the ole casino," Melinda sneered as she held up a JESPER.

"Wait, is she a Desperado?" Mimoko asked.

"Desper what now? Oh right, we got some of 'em collabing with us. But this thing's a JESPER made by ole Jester."

Mimoko scowled as she recognized the name. "So that cheater is responsible for all this then?"

"Whoa, whoa, 'cheater'? Uh, cheating's all he does. But I don't cheat. So anyway, what's your name?"

Mimoko and Emeri went silent, but Melinda decided to look Mimoko up anyway.

"Wow, Mimoko Inoue. Grandmaster!? ... Oh? OH!? Heheheheh. Talk about birds of a feather. Anyway, cruise ship to Malltown leaving right now, and you're coming aboard!" Melinda sneered as a large crusie ship suddenly burst out of the volcano and flew down into the magma river below.

It then approached Melinda and extended a boarding ramp as two guys and a small furry creature exited.

"Ore wa ketsu ga daisuki desu," the small creature grumbled.

"He says, 'I am the great spirit Ketsuketsu of the Yowielands. Now get on my ship, bitches," the man in a lime green bodysuit stated.

Mimoko and Emeri naturally went on guard, as the final man, a guy in a fundoshi and geta began stomping towards them.

"Yeah, no pissing off Ketsuketsu here. Just get on the fucking boat so we can get out of here!"

"No way! I thought you quit making videos!" a voice called out.

Everyone turned to notice Kuragi giddily jumping up and down.

"Ugh, don't run off," Ai grumbled as she and the other gyarus arrived.

"Who is that guy?" Hanabi asked.

"Only the most heinous and offensive guy on the internet! Filthy-"

"'FILTHY'!? I'm Shitty Sal, ya dumb bitch!"

"NO WAY! ...You're rebranding?"

"I've always been Shitty Sal, dammit!" Alright! Kidnapping time! Asses on the boat!" Shitty Sal grumbled as he puled out a wooden paddle.

Kuragi didn't seem scared in the slightest and even giddily ran up the dock. "Yay! We're going to the rice fields!"

"HEY! Don't touch my rice paddies! Shit took forever to grow on the boat!" Shitty Sal yelled as he gave chase.

The other gyarus sighed and began following the two onto the boat. Meanwhile, JZ hid and watched as the lime green bodysuit guy grabbed Emeri and Mimoko and dragged them along too.

"I hope this is a dream, but I don't think it is. Ugh, why'd they all have to run off like that?" he thought as he decided to head after them.

However, Melinda took notice of him and promptly ordered the ship to depart.

"Ore wa ketsu ga daisuki desu!?" Ketsuketsu growled.

"He's too dangerous. We can't let him on," Melinda growled as she dragged Ketsuketsu with her.

The boat quickly began sailing away, as JZ desperately tried to catch up, but he was too late.

"Now what am I going to do?"

"ALOHA!"

JZ looked up as the volcano erupted once more, but this time, a girl came flying out riding a surfboard. He frantically began slapping and pinching himself, but it was all too clear at this point; he was in reality.

The girl then landed before him and struck a pose, before suddenly recoiling in horror. "No way! Why are you here, Meadow Hay maniac!?"

"Huh!?"

"You're the Meadow Hay maniac that beat me with that nasty Meadow Hay Opening!"

It was clear at this point, JZ had been mistaken, for someone else.